Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 20:28     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
Anonymous wrote:No, my kids don’t have anxiety. They are successful college students. My 17 year old started early, yay!! He is gifted.

No, we didn’t do carpool. Why would we? We, the parents drove them where they needed to go.


Wow, this is unusual. You ask "why would we?" There are a million reasons! One of the many: did your kids never get invited anywhere with anyone?
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 20:25     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
Anonymous wrote:We are caravaning to Florida with my parents. They are hoping to occasionally let our DC ride with them in their car. The car we will be taking has a 5 star rating in all departments except one, where it’s a 4 star. Their car is known for poor ratings in every department. You hear horror stories, and my better judgement is telling me not to allow it. I don’t want to flat out say that their car is unreliable in a crash. What would you say? Also, my husband thinks I’m being paranoid so he’s no help.


Your husband is helping. He told you you're being paranoid and you are.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 20:21     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
4 vs. 5 star means nothing. Its the driver you need to be concerned with and the car seats.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 20:17     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
I always check safety ratings of cars, that’s how we decide what car to buy.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 20:16     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
No, my kids don’t have anxiety. They are successful college students. My 17 year old started early, yay!! He is gifted.

No, we didn’t do carpool. Why would we? We, the parents drove them where they needed to go.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 19:56     Subject: Re:I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
NP here. I have never ever let my kids drive in the car with anyone but DH and I. My kids are 19 and 17 now. I’m glad I didn’t. There was no need.


Holy crap!?!?!
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 19:38     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:NP here. I have never ever let my kids drive in the car with anyone but DH and I. My kids are 19 and 17 now. I’m glad I didn’t. There was no need.



So in 19 years, your kids have never been in a carpool, gotten a ride home from school or practice from someone else, gone out with their friends after everyone got their drivers’ licenses... nothing? Ever? And you think not letting them do any of that is a good thing? Wow.


Seriously. These parents are freaks and have probably turned their kids into freaks as well.


The kids are going to grow up with so much anxiety--and mom will wonder, bewildered, how they ended up that way.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 19:36     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
Wait-how old are the kids? Little ones, I'd say no. Over age 10 or so, I'd probably be more ok with it.

In the end, it is the OP's choice and the grandparents shouldn't be pushing her.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 19:15     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:NP here. I have never ever let my kids drive in the car with anyone but DH and I. My kids are 19 and 17 now. I’m glad I didn’t. There was no need.



So in 19 years, your kids have never been in a carpool, gotten a ride home from school or practice from someone else, gone out with their friends after everyone got their drivers’ licenses... nothing? Ever? And you think not letting them do any of that is a good thing? Wow.


Seriously. These parents are freaks and have probably turned their kids into freaks as well.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 19:05     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
Anonymous wrote:NP here. I have never ever let my kids drive in the car with anyone but DH and I. My kids are 19 and 17 now. I’m glad I didn’t. There was no need.



So in 19 years, your kids have never been in a carpool, gotten a ride home from school or practice from someone else, gone out with their friends after everyone got their drivers’ licenses... nothing? Ever? And you think not letting them do any of that is a good thing? Wow.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 19:01     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
Anonymous wrote:NP here. I have never ever let my kids drive in the car with anyone but DH and I. My kids are 19 and 17 now. I’m glad I didn’t. There was no need.



Double wow!!

Do they drive themselves??
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 18:54     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
Anonymous wrote:I'm curious: do you read the ratings for every car your child rides in? Is this a standard you apply universally?


I hope this is the case (well, not really because I think it’s an overbearing level of control!) - otherwise you are being two-faced.


Just say that you are only comfortable having DC with you on long haul trips. Maybe one of them will ride in the backseat in your car and keep DC company.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 18:41     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?

Don’t die on that hill, OP.

What matters is that the drivers are responsible, not tired or disabled, and the roads are good and you all avoid driving in low light or at night.

Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 18:37     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
You should seek help for this level of anxiety. It surely impacts your and your family’s life in other ways also.
Anonymous
Post 03/10/2019 18:36     Subject: I don’t want my kids in their car. Reasonable?
That is super paranoid, OP. Like, if you were a friend, we would be having a heart to heart about you seeing a therapist for anxiety.