Anonymous wrote:I’m a DW and I get up at 2:00 PM. I go to sleep at 5:00 AM, though. Kids are grown & DH and I run our own company, so I get a lot of work done in the wee morning hours when others are sleeping.

This is close to my dream schedule, which is bed around 3am, sleep til 11ish. I did this in school and it was amazing. As is, I go to bed around 1:30 and sleep til 7:45 during the week. I do the dream schedule on Friday and Saturday.

I get up later that my husband. He is asleep by 8pm typically and our daughter is struggling a bit in hs so I stay up until she is done with her homework and I know she is in bed. He takes over in the morning and I sleep in unless I have to be at work at a specific time and then I am just tired.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She sounds depressed. And you’re not her dad.

"depressed" no its just lazy and implying that the OP is somehow out of line an attempt to shame or gaslight the husband into thinking he has no right to expect at 50/50 partnership or to hold his "partner" accountable.

Being depressed is not a free pass, she get help or they divorce.

Idk anybody that is not a teen who sleeps till 10 and I don't know any woman who sits on the toilet for 45 minutes.

Meet my husband. If he's out of bed before 10 AM on a day off I'm in shock. Same if he actually does something around the house.

Op I can't work, but I'm up around 6:30 during the week and have a load of laundry going by 7:30, up around 7:30 on weekends.

DH and I both work, but his schedule is the same daily and I usually only have to get up and go in the morning about 3 times per week. On those days we both get up around 7, give or take 15 minutes, and it varies which one of us is up first (though lately it's him). On days that I don't have to get up and go I get up around 7:30.

There have been times in our marriage when I get up at 6 and he sleeps another hour, and vice versa.

We have one child who needs to be up by 7:45, so we are almost always up before or right around when the kid wakes.

Wife here. I get up 6:45,along with everyone else. Occasionally DH ir I will get up earlier to work out. And when he travels, I'm up at 615 to get myself ready and drink coffee before kids up . We both work and share duties more or less equitably, though it took a few years to get there and I know he will never, ever clean it a drawer, closet, pantry, etc, or pay a bill...

My mother was like ops wife. She was up with us when we were little but from grade school on it was mostly my dad. She cooked dinner nightly until I was about 10 but it dwindled...and did afternoon pick up until she hired a student to do ut...she slept in weekends past noon or 1pm, relied on a housekeeper to do all cleaning, and complained about spending her life catering to my dad and us. By 14,I was making dinner for us and taking the bus everywhere. I'm not really sure what my mom did with her time, except she often stayed up until 3 or 4am, working herself into anxiety or rage She was depressed, angry, emotionally damaged. My parents divorced when I was a teenager.my mom blamed my dad for being selfish, only years later do I see how profoundly dysfunctional my mom was as spouse and parent....she just couldn't handle much.

My mom has the gall now to criticize our parenting, and how much I work, etc. She never worked and was a terrible parent in many ways, but took me yearsto see it. I had grown up believing her marytdom. But she had a husband who did a lot, no household demands, and independent, well behaved kids. She could have oursued a career...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a stay at home parent and I get up around 6:00 to get my teenagers up for their 6:45 bus. I go downstairs and make lunches for the kids and my husband if he requests it. If anyone wants breakfast, they can grab a cereal bar. Nobody wants cooked food that early in the morning. At 7:00 I wake up my youngest child for his 8:00 bus. I then take a shower while he watches TV and eats his cereal bar.

Once the last kid is out the door, I probably spend 1-2 hours online reading the news and assorted social websites. I frequently make myself daily to-do lists as a reminder to not spend all day on the computer (which sometimes happens if I'm feeling down). The list includes domestic chores and errands. If I get half the list done I feel pretty good about myself. Kids start coming home around 2:30 which is when I need to perform air traffic control to keep them from killing each other. Some days I have a hot dinner ready for everyone by the time husband comes home. Other days, kids have short order items (grilled cheese or scrambled eggs) and husband has to fix his own meal when he comes home. It really depends on how the day rolls. I almost always do the dishes at the end of the day.

That is a significant amount of time. If your effective working time is from 8 - 2:30 that is 6 hours - 2 = 4 hours or 2/6 = 1/3 of the time.

Wait, you 'stay home' with school age / teenagers and can't even be bothered to cook them meals?

You are incorrect. I cook and prepare all of their meals. It's just not always an organized "main dish" involving a large hunk of meat and hours of roasting/simmering. Sometimes I do cook a big dish, other times I cook quick meals to order. One kid wants grilled cheese, another wants an omelette, etc. and they each get what they want. I'd say about half the time there's a big meal, and the other half it's short order style. My poor DH sometimes gets the short end if he comes home and has to quick prep his own meal. There's always some sort of protein around that can be used to make a quick hot meal.

See the bold above. You admitted that you feed your kids cereal bars and let him watch TV instead of cooking a healthy breakfast...

The teenagers refused to eat breakfast as soon as they became teenagers. They won't even eat the cereal bars anymore. Anything cooked at 6:00am would just sit there making everyone feel nauseated. They tell me they're not even hungry before lunchtime. The youngest (pre-teen) won't eat a prepared breakfast, either. It would be a waste of food and time in our house. Nobody wants hot food before the sun rises.

Anonymous wrote:Mine consistently sleeps until about 9:20 - 10:00 then warms up the breakfast I make before I leave for work. She sits on the toilet for about 45 minutes while she looks through her social media. I just called her and she is still sitting in the bathroom. When I get home I'll get to wash the breakfast dishes and I'll find her plate still sitting at her place on the table.

Can anyone here remind me what the benefit of marriage is for men these days?

Your wife seems exactly like my husband except he sleeps later.

Anonymous wrote:My wife was up at 5 am today, and she will nap from 1 pm-2 pm. But that is not really what you are asking, are you?

Your wife may be depressed, may have undiagnosed medical issues (check her thyroid) or may be she has ADD.

It could also be that there is nothing in her day that is pressing and needs to be done. In anycase, if she needs someone to help her with household chores, then you should get a cleaner.

If she is sleeping until 10 am and spending an hour in the bathroom the only issue with her chores is that she isn't doing them. I think you were just trolling.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a stay at home parent and I get up around 6:00 to get my teenagers up for their 6:45 bus. I go downstairs and make lunches for the kids and my husband if he requests it. If anyone wants breakfast, they can grab a cereal bar. Nobody wants cooked food that early in the morning. At 7:00 I wake up my youngest child for his 8:00 bus. I then take a shower while he watches TV and eats his cereal bar.

Once the last kid is out the door, I probably spend 1-2 hours online reading the news and assorted social websites. I frequently make myself daily to-do lists as a reminder to not spend all day on the computer (which sometimes happens if I'm feeling down). The list includes domestic chores and errands. If I get half the list done I feel pretty good about myself. Kids start coming home around 2:30 which is when I need to perform air traffic control to keep them from killing each other. Some days I have a hot dinner ready for everyone by the time husband comes home. Other days, kids have short order items (grilled cheese or scrambled eggs) and husband has to fix his own meal when he comes home. It really depends on how the day rolls. I almost always do the dishes at the end of the day.

That is a significant amount of time. If your effective working time is from 8 - 2:30 that is 6 hours - 2 = 4 hours or 2/6 = 1/3 of the time.

Wait, you 'stay home' with school age / teenagers and can't even be bothered to cook them meals?

You are incorrect. I cook and prepare all of their meals. It's just not always an organized "main dish" involving a large hunk of meat and hours of roasting/simmering. Sometimes I do cook a big dish, other times I cook quick meals to order. One kid wants grilled cheese, another wants an omelette, etc. and they each get what they want. I'd say about half the time there's a big meal, and the other half it's short order style. My poor DH sometimes gets the short end if he comes home and has to quick prep his own meal. There's always some sort of protein around that can be used to make a quick hot meal.

See the bold above. You admitted that you feed your kids cereal bars and let him watch TV instead of cooking a healthy breakfast...

Anonymous wrote:What is the point here, besides to bash women? You had me until your misogynist question?

LOL bet you are still in bed.

My wife was up at 5 am today, and she will nap from 1 pm-2 pm. But that is not really what you are asking, are you?

Your wife may be depressed, may have undiagnosed medical issues (check her thyroid) or may be she has ADD.

It could also be that there is nothing in her day that is pressing and needs to be done. In anycase, if she needs someone to help her with household chores, then you should get a cleaner.

Wife here..up at 6 am M-F...7:30 am on the weekends

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a stay at home parent and I get up around 6:00 to get my teenagers up for their 6:45 bus. I go downstairs and make lunches for the kids and my husband if he requests it. If anyone wants breakfast, they can grab a cereal bar. Nobody wants cooked food that early in the morning. At 7:00 I wake up my youngest child for his 8:00 bus. I then take a shower while he watches TV and eats his cereal bar.

Once the last kid is out the door, I probably spend 1-2 hours online reading the news and assorted social websites. I frequently make myself daily to-do lists as a reminder to not spend all day on the computer (which sometimes happens if I'm feeling down). The list includes domestic chores and errands. If I get half the list done I feel pretty good about myself. Kids start coming home around 2:30 which is when I need to perform air traffic control to keep them from killing each other. Some days I have a hot dinner ready for everyone by the time husband comes home. Other days, kids have short order items (grilled cheese or scrambled eggs) and husband has to fix his own meal when he comes home. It really depends on how the day rolls. I almost always do the dishes at the end of the day.

That is a significant amount of time. If your effective working time is from 8 - 2:30 that is 6 hours - 2 = 4 hours or 2/6 = 1/3 of the time.

Wait, you 'stay home' with school age / teenagers and can't even be bothered to cook them meals?

You are incorrect. I cook and prepare all of their meals. It's just not always an organized "main dish" involving a large hunk of meat and hours of roasting/simmering. Sometimes I do cook a big dish, other times I cook quick meals to order. One kid wants grilled cheese, another wants an omelette, etc. and they each get what they want. I'd say about half the time there's a big meal, and the other half it's short order style. My poor DH sometimes gets the short end if he comes home and has to quick prep his own meal. There's always some sort of protein around that can be used to make a quick hot meal.

My wife is a SAHM so she gets up 6:20 to get kids breakfast and ready for school while I also help and get ready for work. She also does all meal prep and meals, keeps a reasonably tidy house and runs all the little stuff at schools and such that I don't have to worry about.

I feel for you OP, I would question the benefit of marriage too if I were you. DTMFA

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a stay at home parent and I get up around 6:00 to get my teenagers up for their 6:45 bus. I go downstairs and make lunches for the kids and my husband if he requests it. If anyone wants breakfast, they can grab a cereal bar. Nobody wants cooked food that early in the morning. At 7:00 I wake up my youngest child for his 8:00 bus. I then take a shower while he watches TV and eats his cereal bar.

Once the last kid is out the door, I probably spend 1-2 hours online reading the news and assorted social websites. I frequently make myself daily to-do lists as a reminder to not spend all day on the computer (which sometimes happens if I'm feeling down). The list includes domestic chores and errands. If I get half the list done I feel pretty good about myself. Kids start coming home around 2:30 which is when I need to perform air traffic control to keep them from killing each other. Some days I have a hot dinner ready for everyone by the time husband comes home. Other days, kids have short order items (grilled cheese or scrambled eggs) and husband has to fix his own meal when he comes home. It really depends on how the day rolls. I almost always do the dishes at the end of the day.

That is a significant amount of time. If your effective working time is from 8 - 2:30 that is 6 hours - 2 = 4 hours or 2/6 = 1/3 of the time.

Wait, you 'stay home' with school age / teenagers and can't even be bothered to cook them meals?