Anonymous wrote:Wow this thread is really sad.

The OP is reaching out for help.

Wow this thread is really sad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You prioritize your job over your children. Get counseling please before you screw them up forever.

Not OP but men do this all the time and they don't get grief over it.

Not in my house. Men should get grief too.

100%

It sounds like you're depressed.

I loove my job, but I leave the second I can because I cant wait to get back to my kid.

Anonymous wrote:Child Protective Services real case.

I hope you're joking.

There is a difference between not liking your kids and not liking their behavior or their personality flaws.

I have a suggestion that may not be popular. In addition to the mental health stuff above, can you look into getting a regular sitter who the kids love? Someone older who could stay in their lives for a good 5-10 years, like a surrogate grandmother or nanny. If you really felt for example that you couldn’t do laundry or cooking you might outsource. Maybe finding someone else to give a little extra love and attention to your kids could help their development. Create a village with friends and family.

Saying this because I have many friends who weren’t super close to their moms, who did enjoy work, but who compensated some with hired help, family friends, and their own friends. It is possible for them to get part of what they need from others. That doesn’t absolve you from working through your own emotional blocks and issues. But I would do it in tandem, because why not? Your stuff could take some time and in the meantime your kids still need things.

Talk to your doctor about depression.

NP. I love my kids, but at the end of a long day, their screaming really irritates me. They are playing and I think it will get better as they get older or we move into a bigger house. It is easy to see the kids as one more thing to deal with, but I really try to look into their eyes and see them as the little humans who need me. I am not a kid person I realize (really I always knew this), but I love my kids and I’m doing my best. My mom definitely saw her kids as another chore and that really hurt. I’m trying to be better.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You prioritize your job over your children. Get counseling please before you screw them up forever.

Not OP but men do this all the time and they don't get grief over it.

Yeah, my dad avoided me and I knew it and had a very poor relationship with him before he passed.

If my dh was pulling this, I would hope he would see he needs counseling too. I had a rough beginning to parenting and wish I had had more time off from my kids, but I always loved them!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You prioritize your job over your children. Get counseling please before you screw them up forever.

Not OP but men do this all the time and they don't get grief over it.

Not in my house. Men should get grief too.

OP, we all feel this way sometimes. It's perfectly normal to have and to express negative feelings about motherhood. It's okay to want time for yourself. Start with that assumption. Having said that, I think you should explore some talk therapy or some couples counseling. When one huge part of your life isn't working, it's time to figure out options.

Sounds like depression to me too.

I agree with all the PPs who counseled you to see a therapist/take some medication. I have an anxiety disorder and when my anxiety is really high, I want to avoid everyone and “decompress”. SSRI prescription helps that a lot.

Anonymous wrote:Got pregnant accidentally and then had another by choice (they are now 10 and 5). I find myself actively avoiding them. My husband does all the getting up and making lunches and playtimes etc. I work a lot. My job is demanding. And I honestly just want to be left alone when I’m not working.

What is wrong with me?!?

This was my mom when I was a kid and I really started to notice at around age 10. I'd get some help via therapy now to try to work on the issues.

Or at least start saving for the therapy your kids will need because they will realize you hated being their mom and didn't like them much.