Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 08:52     Subject: Re:Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It's pretty obvious OP is NOT talking about kids being allowed to have wine with adults at dinner parties, etc. She is talking about kids partying either with parents approval or with their actual provision.

My mom has a bunch of siblings and 2 of her younger siblings have 4 kids clustered in age together within 3 years. They do a lot all together and kind of raised them all together. They are the "cool" parents. Nothing happened to their underage kids, thank God, maybe bc they also chauffered them to all their parties and picked them up (drunk). But it definitely did NOT stave off them partying hard in college and adulthood. It just carried on the same really as before. The idea that 15 year olds will learn how to drink and then have limited alcohol in college seems to be a bit of a myth.


It’s usually the alcoholic parents allowing young kids to drink.


That's what is kind of weird, everyone in my extended family is a social drinker really, no heavy drinkers and of these parents I would say 2 of the 4 are pretty light drinkers. It was interesting to see and not sure why the dynamic worked that way. I'm glad that all the kids are mid 20s now, responsible and all that. But could have gone a different way.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 07:06     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:If the kiddos have good marks, are involved at school (clubs, sports, stu gov) & volunteer who gives a damn if parents let them booze? Rather have kids enjoy a few beers at my house than be God knows where with kids pushing drugs and random boys creeping on them.




Here's a third option: they can go to concerts, movies and other age appropriate entertainment and NOT drink. That is how my friends and I spent our free time as teenagers.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 05:39     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:God help any parent who serves my child. I will end them.


Bet your kid will never tell you.


My kids won't need to tell me. DH is in cybersecurity, if you were sitting in an airport right now or anywhere connected to wifi, he could pull up your phone, get through all of your security settings and see exactly what you were doing on your phone, look through all your pictures, see your texts, know everything about your life as it relates to your phone.

I can assure you, unless my teen uses a landline to communicate about these things or writes notes, we're gonna know, who, what, where, when and it will all be documented.


A violation of privacy - but pretty cool in case of emergency.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 05:38     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:
When I invite parents and children over for dinner, and serve wine at that dinner, I ask the teens if they want to taste, with their parents' permission. We are French, and this how children start drinking responsibly in France. A sip, not more.

I can't imagine offering alcohol to minors without their parents' express permission, let alone letting them drive themselves home afterward.


Or to stagger home alone, drunk, only to have them freeze to death in a pond.
Now those are some cool parents!

https://www.google.com/amp/s/wtop.com/montgomery-county/2017/12/cause-bethesda-teenagers-death-released/amp/

Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 05:23     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:SES has a lot to do with it. OP if you’re a scholarship family I’d tell my kid to stay the hell away from any party where liquor was being served, even with adult supervision.

If something goes wrong, your family may not have the financial or social resources to make it “go away”.

Only scholarship kids must stay away?
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 05:03     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:God help any parent who serves my child. I will end them.


Bet your kid will never tell you.


My kids won't need to tell me. DH is in cybersecurity, if you were sitting in an airport right now or anywhere connected to wifi, he could pull up your phone, get through all of your security settings and see exactly what you were doing on your phone, look through all your pictures, see your texts, know everything about your life as it relates to your phone.

I can assure you, unless my teen uses a landline to communicate about these things or writes notes, we're gonna know, who, what, where, when and it will all be documented.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 03:46     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
SES has a lot to do with it. OP if you’re a scholarship family I’d tell my kid to stay the hell away from any party where liquor was being served, even with adult supervision.

If something goes wrong, your family may not have the financial or social resources to make it “go away”.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 03:32     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
If the kiddos have good marks, are involved at school (clubs, sports, stu gov) & volunteer who gives a damn if parents let them booze? Rather have kids enjoy a few beers at my house than be God knows where with kids pushing drugs and random boys creeping on them.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 03:27     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It's the thing at the homes of popular kids, so parents go along. We never did but it cost our kids socially. We knew this and still refused.


Addition

Our neighbors were "cool parents." A kid died after leaving their house and getting in a wreck. Their son ended up in rehab, their marriage broke up and so did that of the kid who died and the parents of the kid who was driving.


Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 03:00     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:God help any parent who serves my child. I will end them.


Bet your kid will never tell you.


My parents had the same attitude as the first PP and I never drank. I was too afraid of the consequences. The attitude that “they’ll do it anyway and lie about it” may be true for a very small portion of kids, but there are plenty of good kids who follow the rules of their parents. Stop using “they’ll just do it and lie about it” as an excuse to be a lazy, shitty parent.
Anonymous
Post 02/09/2019 00:14     Subject: Re:Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
It’s usually the alcoholic parents allowing young kids to drink.


...in the USA.
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2019 22:12     Subject: Re:Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:It's pretty obvious OP is NOT talking about kids being allowed to have wine with adults at dinner parties, etc. She is talking about kids partying either with parents approval or with their actual provision.

My mom has a bunch of siblings and 2 of her younger siblings have 4 kids clustered in age together within 3 years. They do a lot all together and kind of raised them all together. They are the "cool" parents. Nothing happened to their underage kids, thank God, maybe bc they also chauffered them to all their parties and picked them up (drunk). But it definitely did NOT stave off them partying hard in college and adulthood. It just carried on the same really as before. The idea that 15 year olds will learn how to drink and then have limited alcohol in college seems to be a bit of a myth.


It’s usually the alcoholic parents allowing young kids to drink.
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2019 21:56     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:I cannot believe how many parents are having teens over and providing or allowing them to drink. My daughter is a freshman and there have been several occasions where this has been the situation. Makes it hard to parent! And what are they thinking? This is private school kids FWIW, but I’m sure that part doesn’t matter.


The country club crowd does this from what I hear from parents in high school grades. One such father bragged to a group of parents how wasted his 9th grade daughter was after a dc party. We were all in shock as that is young to drink in our opinion and would not be tolerated. Ask any psychologist and kids are happier and have more self worth when they are given guidelines and boundaries.
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2019 18:25     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:God help any parent who serves my child. I will end them.


Bet your kid will never tell you.




Bet she will notice the signs IF her child drinks or uses drugs. What kind of life do some of you, who believe it's an inevitability that all kids will be hard partying drunks, live?
Anonymous
Post 02/08/2019 18:13     Subject: Parents serving alcohol or allowing it in their homes
Anonymous wrote:God help any parent who serves my child. I will end them.


Bet your kid will never tell you.