Anonymous wrote:My preschooler is mean. I try but she does not care. Nothing works. She takes things from others, bites, slaps, screams, and must manage everyone with them doing exactly what she says. We pulled her out of her 2 a week half day preschool and she is back to staying at home. We meet with kids at the park to play and other playdates and it works with other kids that are alpha like her. They have their pissing contests and they are done. Time outs work for a little bit but that is it. I am sorry your LO is going through it. I hope they pull their kids out.

Hugs to you. It will get better.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're dealing with physically aggressive kids, then I don't understand why you would wait a few weeks to talk to the school. If it's a case of some kids not being nice, then I think you might be overreacting.

Three- and four-year-olds are just figuring out friendship, so you get a lot of kids saying "You're not my friend" when what they mean is "I don't want to play with you right now" or "I'm mad that you won't do what I want." That's totally normal, and not the same as "mean kid" behavior.

It really matters what you mean by "the treatment." Three- and four-year-olds are rarely bullies or mean kids. They are often immature, impulsive, and tactless.

Seriously, this!

I get tired of people ascribing all kinds of bad behaviors to children who are just trying to figure out how to relate to their peers

The op was very specific. The behaviors were out of bounds and need to be addressed.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're dealing with physically aggressive kids, then I don't understand why you would wait a few weeks to talk to the school. If it's a case of some kids not being nice, then I think you might be overreacting.

Three- and four-year-olds are just figuring out friendship, so you get a lot of kids saying "You're not my friend" when what they mean is "I don't want to play with you right now" or "I'm mad that you won't do what I want." That's totally normal, and not the same as "mean kid" behavior.

It really matters what you mean by "the treatment." Three- and four-year-olds are rarely bullies or mean kids. They are often immature, impulsive, and tactless.

Seriously, this!

I get tired of people ascribing all kinds of bad behaviors to children who are just trying to figure out how to relate to their peers

It may be developmentally normal for kids to be unkind without realizing it/intention, but it also developmentally normal for adults to step in and correct the behavior when it happens. Refusing to parent kids isn’t helping them - they are never learning the difference between socially acceptable behavior and mean behavior/bad manners. Sure, eventually you need to let them work things out on their own, with little to no guidance (depending on the situation), but that is only *after* they’ve been appropriately guided/patented and given the necessary tools/knowledge to make those decision. “Lord of the Flies” - that’s what happens when kids are left to their own devices without proper parental intervention!

Anonymous wrote:If you're dealing with physically aggressive kids, then I don't understand why you would wait a few weeks to talk to the school. If it's a case of some kids not being nice, then I think you might be overreacting.

Three- and four-year-olds are just figuring out friendship, so you get a lot of kids saying "You're not my friend" when what they mean is "I don't want to play with you right now" or "I'm mad that you won't do what I want." That's totally normal, and not the same as "mean kid" behavior.

It really matters what you mean by "the treatment." Three- and four-year-olds are rarely bullies or mean kids. They are often immature, impulsive, and tactless.

Seriously, this!

I get tired of people ascribing all kinds of bad behaviors to children who are just trying to figure out how to relate to their peers