So I have 1 super picky DS, and the other DS is a real foodie. I hear you OP, and with my picky one, I always tell the parents not to worry if he doesn't eat. We'll either feed him ahead of time or he'll have fruit or bread. The adventurous one has friends come over and I made dinner and 1 of his friends doesn't eat meat, only plain pasta, and some fruit. It's a short period of time, let them enjoy playing and don't over think the food. It's not like they're adults and you've gone out of your way to made an extravagant dinner. It's just a playdate and kids are learning about each other including food dislikes, etc. Agree that when I grew up, we have a large family, you ate what was served. Our generation wasn't picky, but then again we didn't have food allergies etc.

But really OP, did he eat the hotdog?

Anonymous wrote:When you say scraped the toppings off the pizza I'm assuming you made the error of ordering pizza with gross shite on top. That was your bad.

Wrong. Plain pizza. Cheese and tomato sauce.

Anonymous wrote:Why not ask the kids what they will eat before making it?

Oh, well, gee I don't know... maybe because some adults don't believe in catering to kids like we're their servants?

We are French and have not noticed this - who are you socializing with, OP?

My main concern is navigating between different allergies and food policies: my son has a lethal nut allergy, so we have to be careful with Asian restaurants (except Korean and Japanese) and baked goods. One friend is allergic to pumpkin. One friend is vegetarian. I always ask ahead of time.

No one, in the 18 years we've done this, has ever sat down and declared they couldn't eat something.

I can’t believe every single one of your kids friends is that picky! Maybe it’s just the crowd they hang out with. The few kids that have come over to our house for dinner eat whatever I’m making.

Anonymous wrote:“Here’s what I’ve made. If you’re hungry, you’ll eat it.”

Why be rude? You could say I've made hotdogs and fries, help yourselves. If you don't like either and are hungry we have cereal, fruit,cheese a turkey sandwich (or anything else you happen to have). Offer a couple alternatives that don't really create work for you and don't stress about whether they don't like what you made.

Anonymous wrote:I think you are on the right track when serving simple, plain food. Hotdog, bun ,French fries and some fruit. Let kids pick and choose the foods they prefer. Larlo doesn't like fries? Have another hotdog. Perhaps the child speaking their preferences out loud is the problem. Teach your children to not comment on the menu and to say thank you!

My kids don't eat hotdogs. They will just not eat if I tried to give them hotdogs. One DC won't eat pizza either. If you offered a bowl of spinach and some blueberries, no problem. I can't see forcing a guest to eat hotdogs or fries.

Well I was feeling bad about my toddlers eating only half a thai veggie dumpling, a bit of chicken satay, and picking the pineapple out of the pineapple rice until this post. It is definitely not a European v. American thing--I lived as a child in both the US and Italy. Honestly it is the quality of food and spices used/kids are exposed to. It also is partially the parents palates. If you don't expose them enough when they are small, it wont happen until they are in their 20s

“Here’s what I’ve made. If you’re hungry, you’ll eat it.”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why not ask the kids what they will eat before making it?

I agree with this. If you're going out of your way to cook foods that the kids will like, might as well ask first.

Because one will say I hate pizza, another one will say I hate bread, the third will hate meat, the fourth vegetables, the fifth sugar.

You can't please everyone!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Oh. Tough luck then. I hope you're not going to be TOO hungry".

Or simply "you don't have to eat them."

Would the southern refrain work in this instance? "Well bless your heart!"

Anonymous wrote:"Oh. Tough luck then. I hope you're not going to be TOO hungry".

Or simply "you don't have to eat them."

Anonymous wrote: our kids' friends (ranging in age from 8 to 12)

OP what stood out for me from your post was not the pickiness but the fact that these kids were so up front about it.

By age 8-12, shouldn't kids start to know when to state their food preferences and when to keep their mouths shut? And if they are really hungry and there's nothing they can even stomach, when and how to politely ask for something different? And the difference between close friends you can be more open with, and families you just met?

I think that many cultures do better than the US does with adult-child relationships and how we talk to each other. Europe is one but I can think of others.

I think one reason European children are less picky is that the cafeteria lunches are better over there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:From your complaint, it’s Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. Kid won’t eat your “fancy” meals and you complain. Kid won’t eat crappy kid food and you complain.
Honestly I think you’re being too sensitive. Kids comment. Who cares? Put out a few things and if they’re hungry they’ll find something. If not, oh well.

I guess my expectation is that kids won't complain when served food at the house of someone they barely know. Basic manners, y'know?

Eh. From what you posted it was a matter of fact kid statement. He didn’t say - that’s gross (which is rude) but that he didn’t eat like French fries (a statement of opinion). I know adults who say I don’t eat that because it’s carbs or whatever. People are allowed to have food preferences. I just really think op is blowing it out of proportion.

Exactly. I agree with this and the person who said put out whatever and they’ll eat it or they won’t. Don’t take it personally.

Yup. I had a bunch of boys over today. I told them we have apples, grapes and pretzels for snack. One ate pretzels, the other declined all three. Really no big deal.
PS oven fries are gross—I would not hold it against any child that doesn’t like them.