In order to avoid that awful yellow tinge you have to use special shampoos, and gray hair needs to be "colored" with a clear no-color glaze at least once a month to avoid those crooked wire hairs that stick up. And your cut has to be high quality and kept up regularly. You need deep conditioning on a regular basis. So you end up spend just as much time and money as if you kept coloring

No. Not needing any of this.

Gray hair looks bad when you aren't doing very high maintenance on cut, daily styling, eyebrows, makeup, skin care, and clothing. You don't have any wiggle room to slack off when you're gray. My mom, who was a full time homemaker her entire married life, wears at least lipstick and blush every single day and wouldn't think of putting her hair into a ponytail unless she was scrubbing a toilet. She has had gorgeous silver hair since she was about 45 and is constantly complimented on her glamorous look. If you can do all the grooming and styling, then by all means go gray. But for those of us who are too lazy/busy/whatever and know we'll spend weekends running around without makeup and won't always manage to have our brows done every 7 days, we will look like those sad women who have just given up if we go gray. Those are the people who give gray a bad rep. And don't think for a minute that going gray is going to save you money. In order to avoid that awful yellow tinge you have to use special shampoos, and gray hair needs to be "colored" with a clear no-color glaze at least once a month to avoid those crooked wire hairs that stick up. And your cut has to be high quality and kept up regularly. You need deep conditioning on a regular basis. So you end up spend just as much time and money as if you kept coloring.

I was thinking of getting silver highlights because most of my gray is in the front by my face and not in the back. Highlights would make my hair more silver overall. I've never dyed my hair or gone to a salon to dye it. What do highlights cost on average for shoulder length hair?

I’m in my mid 40’s and stopped dying my hair years ago, when it was only a little grey. To not make the transition line not as noticeable I got highlights to blend it. I also did some natural dye shampoos that wash out over time. There’s also some products that make it not so “brassy”.
A coworker, a few years older than me, had shoulder length hair and just grew it out. Took a couple years. I don’t know how she did it since the line would have driven me crazy.

Anonymous wrote:The great thing about having done it many years ago is it's no longer "a thing". It's nothing I think about. Reading this thread has made me feel like I'm missing out on making it a crusade. I should have made it a personal crusade and should be getting accolades!! Instead I think about other things. I don't wake up thinking about my gray. Do I want new Fall clothes,... how about this new makeup. I actually give a lot of attention to my eyebrows probably because they are graying and I want them to be a good compliment to my hair.

You are more confident in your appearance than I am. I worry about it, which annoys me. Accolades seem uneccessary, but it is admirable not to follow the status quo herd!

Anonymous wrote:Would you recommend this? Or just let it grow out, no drastic cut?

Or did you revert back to coloring?

I am feeling very close to OVER all of the expensive, ridiculous maintenance I do. I'm in my early 40s with white hair/mixed with some natural brown, currently colored in attempt to retain youthful appearance.

I have an older boss with a helmet of stiff dyed hair. I don't want to look like that, but I empathize very much.

I searched for threads, and only found frequency of coloring.

Please do tell? Also any related information that has to do with your hair program, such as your work environment, age bracket, and if you care what other people think about your appearance.

Thank you.

So I have never dyed my hair and I am starting to get my first grays. I am almost 46 and I am okay with this.

I think as women age their coloring softens and suits gray better.

You can also tone gray hair, give it highlights, etc.

Also remember if you hate it you can always go back to coloring it.

The great thing about having done it many years ago is it's no longer "a thing". It's nothing I think about. Reading this thread has made me feel like I'm missing out on making it a crusade. I should have made it a personal crusade and should be getting accolades!! Instead I think about other things. I don't wake up thinking about my gray. Do I want new Fall clothes,... how about this new makeup. I actually give a lot of attention to my eyebrows probably because they are graying and I want them to be a good compliment to my hair.

It's so dependent on your hair. Some people have a naturally great grey color and texture. Me, mine is straight but wiry without the layer of color added.
I have friends with great grey hair and they look amazing being tall with striking features. That's not me though.

Anonymous wrote:If I saw a woman do this my only thought would be how amazing, and wish I could be as brave. I am 35, color my hair every 3 weeks, started going grey in my teens. I am fed up of the color and honestly just want to stop. Everyone in my family goes grey in their teens, and my mom at 65 still colors her hair all the time. My aunt stopped at 53, and her hair looks amazing at 57. It's really dense, lush, thick, and healthy, even though it's completely grey.

We need more women embracing this to make it easier for the rest of us.

Raising hand to join. I agree wouldn't it be awesome if all the gray haired ladies of all ages just did a mass protest in solidarity- no more dye!

Does your Aunt ever discuss what it's like to be gray in a sea of colors?

If I saw a woman do this my only thought would be how amazing, and wish I could be as brave. I am 35, color my hair every 3 weeks, started going grey in my teens. I am fed up of the color and honestly just want to stop. Everyone in my family goes grey in their teens, and my mom at 65 still colors her hair all the time. My aunt stopped at 53, and her hair looks amazing at 57. It's really dense, lush, thick, and healthy, even though it's completely grey.

We need more women embracing this to make it easier for the rest of us.

Anonymous wrote:Why would you not be doing demi-permanent washes until the real color grows out? Then the demi-perm fades you will have all gray underneath

This is what I thought about doing. Any one try this? It makes sense.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Talk to a good colorist about how to grow it out well. If your current one doesn't give you answers you like, find a new one! Smitten Salon in Clarendon is awesome, if you need a rec.

Thanks! The colorist I go to now and have been for years is great, but is NOT into the gray concept. It's their bread and butter to collect hundreds of dollars per month from many, many customers though. The owner is a little older and she herself sports a solid shock of obviously colored but fashionable hair. Seems like it would be hard to find someone who would recommend against the service they provide.

An honest colorist I really like is Tais at Plane Jane salon in Bethesda. I went to her for the first time a month ago, on reccs from DCUM. First thing she said to me was that she recommended I stop coloring my hair and just get a few highlights because it would look more natural, even with the grays I have on my part. (I'm 47). I couldn't imagine not coloring so I went ahead with my booked appointment for color and highlights but now I'm seriously considering following her advice and letting her transition me out of all-over color and into natural, graying hair.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Facebook group Gray and Proud helped me when I decided to stop coloring at age 45. I used root cover up spray for the first 4-5 months, then got a pixie cut at 6 months. (wish I had gotten the pixie cut sooner) My hair is 100% white. With a stylish pixie cut and some make up (especially red lipstick) I receive compliments almost daily.

Would you mind sharing your age? This is what I want to do, but am scared. Sounds gorgeous.

Probably late 40s, or still under 50?

Anonymous wrote:The Facebook group Gray and Proud helped me when I decided to stop coloring at age 45. I used root cover up spray for the first 4-5 months, then got a pixie cut at 6 months. (wish I had gotten the pixie cut sooner) My hair is 100% white. With a stylish pixie cut and some make up (especially red lipstick) I receive compliments almost daily.

Would you mind sharing your age? This is what I want to do, but am scared. Sounds gorgeous.

The Facebook group Gray and Proud helped me when I decided to stop coloring at age 45. I used root cover up spray for the first 4-5 months, then got a pixie cut at 6 months. (wish I had gotten the pixie cut sooner) My hair is 100% white. With a stylish pixie cut and some make up (especially red lipstick) I receive compliments almost daily.