I think it is just something about this area. And lots of people are just "pretend" wealthy. I know lots of down to earth wealthy people from outside the DMV and I can totally relate to them. Not here though.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it depends on where they got their moeny. I'm in my 40s with $1m HHI and have a few friends in similar situations. All of us are entrepreneurs, and we all grew up middle class at best. At least from waht i"ve noticed, no one is snobby and we treat waitstaff very politely,etc. Maybe it's the mindset that comes when you start your own company and the fight to build it up etc.

x10000

Earned money is nbo comparison to inherited money. I know of people (not my friends) who are practically waiting for either their parents or ILs to die, so they can spend, spend, spend - and are quite smug about it. In reality, they have nothing to be smug about, at all. I secretly wish those types some big surprises.

Eh. I'm a trust fund baby and grew up with hired help that my mother fired in screaming fits whenever she was upset. I swore I'd be different when I grew up, and I am. DH and I are not particularly snobby and always treat and tip waitstaff well. Just because I inherited doesn't mean I don't work hard.

I’m going to ask again, how many of these servers who you tips so well and are so nice to are you actually friends with? How many people are you actually friends who have far less money than you? Being a good tipper proves nothing.

Anonymous wrote:No not really.

We still live in a middle class neighborhood and hang with middle class friends and neighbors. We have a net worth of over $5M in our late 30s (perhaps that is not considered rich though) but you wouldn't know it by our house, the way we dress, or the cars we drive, etc. We just don't feel a need to flaunt it.

We do take some nice vacations though.

This is us. Our circle of closest friends is the same from when we were in our 20s. We're now mid 40s and through work, we have a net worth of around $10M. It hasn't changed much about our life. We take awesome vacations. That's about it.

My thought is what made you get caught up in that lifestyle in the first place? That says something about you. I always knew I didn't want to be a big law partner or hang out at the golf course or belong to the fancy country club. But I suppose it's good you figured it out.

Point being, there are plenty of rich people not living the life you're trying to get away from and that you don't like.

Anonymous wrote:No not really.

We still live in a middle class neighborhood and hang with middle class friends and neighbors. We have a net worth of over $5M in our late 30s (perhaps that is not considered rich though) but you wouldn't know it by our house, the way we dress, or the cars we drive, etc. We just don't feel a need to flaunt it.

We do take some nice vacations though.

I don’t understand your point. All you are saying is that you are (relatively) rich but you have nothing to do with other rich people. That’s no different than me. If you think that the rich are so awesome, why aren’t you moving to their neighborhood and hanging out with them?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it depends on where they got their moeny. I'm in my 40s with $1m HHI and have a few friends in similar situations. All of us are entrepreneurs, and we all grew up middle class at best. At least from waht i"ve noticed, no one is snobby and we treat waitstaff very politely,etc. Maybe it's the mindset that comes when you start your own company and the fight to build it up etc.

x10000

Earned money is nbo comparison to inherited money. I know of people (not my friends) who are practically waiting for either their parents or ILs to die, so they can spend, spend, spend - and are quite smug about it. In reality, they have nothing to be smug about, at all. I secretly wish those types some big surprises.

Eh. I'm a trust fund baby and grew up with hired help that my mother fired in screaming fits whenever she was upset. I swore I'd be different when I grew up, and I am. DH and I are not particularly snobby and always treat and tip waitstaff well. Just because I inherited doesn't mean I don't work hard.

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a silly nanny (ESL) who is trying to write a romance novel. No, I don't care how much money someone has. If they are decent people, who cares?

Because they’re not decent people.

No not really.

We still live in a middle class neighborhood and hang with middle class friends and neighbors. We have a net worth of over $5M in our late 30s (perhaps that is not considered rich though) but you wouldn't know it by our house, the way we dress, or the cars we drive, etc. We just don't feel a need to flaunt it.

We do take some nice vacations though.

It is great that your money privilege is allowing you to live the life you want, meaning distancing yourself from people you don't like. You should acknowledge that. Sadly, most of people are not in your position and have to put up with people they dislike in order to make a living. So, as long as you know that, live anyway and with anyone you want.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’ve probably traveled to more places on earth than anyone you know. It only reinforces my view. I’m not religious, but the “harder to fit a camel through the eye of a needle than get a rich man into heaven” saying rings true to me.

Amen. Middle class here.

You sound like a silly nanny (ESL) who is trying to write a romance novel. No, I don't care how much money someone has. If they are decent people, who cares?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't consider law firm partner money wealthy.

I expected someone might say that, just to provoke a rise. Of course they're rich. If you're making over $1 million a year, sometimes much more, and your net worth is ten times that and you can quit anytime you want, then you're rich by almost any definition except an unreasonable one.

Many, many rich people work even though they don't have to. Doesn't mean they're not rich.

How on earth would they stay motivated? I could see volunteering, or a part time job, but what I don't see is being part of the 9-5 grind, if you know you don't really have to be.

They stay motivated because they are driven by money and enough is never enough. They don’t call it the golden handcuffs for nothing.

Anonymous wrote:So I'm picking up that "big law firm partner wealthy" peers didn't make you feel warm and fuzzy? They worked by the hour right? Maybe they aren't the best standard to use in assessing quality of folks with "wealth."

Rich surround themselves with rich. So when you’re a big law firm partner your clients are mostly rich and you live in a neighborhood and send your kids to school where most people around you are also rich. So it isn’t “I hate rich lawyers,” it’s “I hate rich people.” I’ve been around many, and all kinds, and for a long time. Yuck. No more.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't consider law firm partner money wealthy.

I expected someone might say that, just to provoke a rise. Of course they're rich. If you're making over $1 million a year, sometimes much more, and your net worth is ten times that and you can quit anytime you want, then you're rich by almost any definition except an unreasonable one.

Many, many rich people work even though they don't have to. Doesn't mean they're not rich.

How on earth would they stay motivated? I could see volunteering, or a part time job, but what I don't see is being part of the 9-5 grind, if you know you don't really have to be.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with you OP. I don't know if we're rich but we have a mid 6 figure HHI, large college and retirement funds, paid off house etc. Wr have chosen never to trade up to wealthier neighborhoods because we feel the same way. I interact with many affluent people in my work and as a rule find them and their children less kind, more materialistic, more competitive, and more entitled.

This. I agree too and we also have chosen not to move to a wealthier neighborhood, even though we easily could. OP, I think the PPs are missing your point -- it is more subtle than they seem to understand.

+1

Never buy the one of cheapest houses in the neighborhood, you don't belong there.

Anonymous wrote:I think it depends on where they got their moeny. I'm in my 40s with $1m HHI and have a few friends in similar situations. All of us are entrepreneurs, and we all grew up middle class at best. At least from waht i"ve noticed, no one is snobby and we treat waitstaff very politely,etc. Maybe it's the mindset that comes when you start your own company and the fight to build it up etc.

x10000

Earned money is nbo comparison to inherited money. I know of people (not my friends) who are practically waiting for either their parents or ILs to die, so they can spend, spend, spend - and are quite smug about it. In reality, they have nothing to be smug about, at all. I secretly wish those types some big surprises.