Anonymous
05/16/2018 02:02
Subject: Re:Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
YIKES!!!!! This thread has taken a turn for the worse. MY GOD.
Anonymous
05/16/2018 01:38
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
My MIL had my husband when she was 16. My husband never met his dad and never even knew his name until 5 years ago, when MIL finally told him. My husband tried to find him, but he’s no longer alive. MIL went on to marrying 4 times, is currently engaged to the 5th guy. She had three more kids, all of which my husband was heavily relied on to babysit when he was just a boy. He was 10 when the middle child was born and 12 when the twins were born. He basically raised them, as MIL would go to work after he got home from school and leave them with all 3. He can change a diaper better than any dad I know. MIL has been in several toxic relationships, abuse coming from both sides. She is 52, my husband is 36.
Anonymous
05/16/2018 00:55
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
I had two high school friends drop out because of pregnancy.
My own mother had her first baby when she was 16. My grandmother made my dad marry her (he had joined the Air Force and she called his commander or whatever and explained the situation and he said he's not leaving and my grandmother said yes he is, and they took up a collection and got him the money to go home and get married. Or so the story goes.)
My mom rode the bus from Oregon to Texas to be with my dad. She was about 6 months pregnant, ultimately went into early labor and the baby died. They had another one later the same year, and on and on until I was born 15 years later. My mom went to community college nursing school in the early 70s so she had a way of earning money when my parents divorced when I was about 3. I think they had been married about 18 yrs. My mom remarried within a year or so, but my dad never did. He drank heavily until he dropped dead on the kitchen floor when I was 14 (he was 48.)
My own mother had her first baby when she was 16. My grandmother made my dad marry her (he had joined the Air Force and she called his commander or whatever and explained the situation and he said he's not leaving and my grandmother said yes he is, and they took up a collection and got him the money to go home and get married. Or so the story goes.)
My mom rode the bus from Oregon to Texas to be with my dad. She was about 6 months pregnant, ultimately went into early labor and the baby died. They had another one later the same year, and on and on until I was born 15 years later. My mom went to community college nursing school in the early 70s so she had a way of earning money when my parents divorced when I was about 3. I think they had been married about 18 yrs. My mom remarried within a year or so, but my dad never did. He drank heavily until he dropped dead on the kitchen floor when I was 14 (he was 48.)
Anonymous
05/16/2018 00:51
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
When I was in middle school, the most beautiful girl in school got pregnant at 13 and gave birth to twins at 14. I came to find out a few years ago that she ended up killing herself by drinking acid.
Anonymous
05/16/2018 00:08
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
A friend from middle school had a baby at 16 and her child went on to have a baby at 16 or 17. I had lost touch with her after high school and was shocked to see on Facebook that she was a grandma at 36! I had just had my second child.
Anonymous
05/16/2018 00:06
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:One of my childhood best friends got pregnant at 14 and had her baby just a month after turning 15. My parents had forbidden me from hanging out with her halfway through 6th grade when she became a "bad kid" in their eyes (got caught smoking and then got caught stealing from Icing in the mall). We still spoke but only at school and our friendship suffered because of this. She still invited me to her baby shower and I got her a gift on my own, but my parents wouldn't let me go. They thought it was appalling that her parents were carrying on as if it was a completely normal situation, throwing the showers, having a big 15th birthday party, the dad remodeling the basement to make an apartment for her and the baby's father to live in, etc. She switched to homeschool after the baby was born and we pretty much lost touch for years. She contacted me on Facebook about 3 years ago because it turned out we had another mutual friend through our kid's soccer team and FB suggested me as a friend. The baby she had in HS is turning 21 this year. That's crazy since we're both turning 36 this year. She has a 10 year old and a 6 year old now and is married (not to the HS baby daddy). It's funny because even though so much time has passed, we both still remember each others childhood secrets. I really wish my parents hadn't made me stop being her friend all those years ago.
Why the hostility from your parents?
Once the baby was born it should have been all about moving forward and not looking back.
Seriously??? Because their daughter was in 6th grade and DD's friend was caught shoplifting and smoking...and they were not excited about the prospect of their DD being influenced by the friend's questionable decision-making skills. Birds of a feather and all that... And we all know that the more we hang out with our friends, the more we make excuses for their poor choices (getting pregnant and having a baby at 15 was arguably not the best choice for this girl's life path), and the parents did not want this "normalized" by their teen daughter.
Great that they are friends now, but I think PP's parents made the right call to have PP keep her distance at the time.
Anonymous
05/15/2018 23:42
Subject: Re:Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
I know someone who is a grandmother at 38. That woman’s mother is in her early 50s, maybe 52-53, and she’s a great-grandmother! Three generations (at least) of teen pregnancies.
Anonymous
05/15/2018 22:57
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
My cousin had 4 children by the time she turned 21. To this day, I’m not sure if she’s ever told her oldest that she has a different father than her siblings. She now is 40 and has 3 grandchildren.
Anonymous
05/15/2018 21:15
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
I had a friend who got pregnant at 15 and had the baby at 16. The baby daddy was dead before the baby arrived (he fell, hit his head in the shower and drowned). She had family support and went on to college, graduated, got a degree, has a career. She got married and has no other children.
My parents discouraged my friendship with her because I guess they thought it might be contagious. My parents were of the "if want to see your future, look at your friends" mindset.
My parents discouraged my friendship with her because I guess they thought it might be contagious. My parents were of the "if want to see your future, look at your friends" mindset.
Anonymous
05/15/2018 20:06
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:One of my childhood best friends got pregnant at 14 and had her baby just a month after turning 15. My parents had forbidden me from hanging out with her halfway through 6th grade when she became a "bad kid" in their eyes (got caught smoking and then got caught stealing from Icing in the mall). We still spoke but only at school and our friendship suffered because of this. She still invited me to her baby shower and I got her a gift on my own, but my parents wouldn't let me go. They thought it was appalling that her parents were carrying on as if it was a completely normal situation, throwing the showers, having a big 15th birthday party, the dad remodeling the basement to make an apartment for her and the baby's father to live in, etc. She switched to homeschool after the baby was born and we pretty much lost touch for years. She contacted me on Facebook about 3 years ago because it turned out we had another mutual friend through our kid's soccer team and FB suggested me as a friend. The baby she had in HS is turning 21 this year. That's crazy since we're both turning 36 this year. She has a 10 year old and a 6 year old now and is married (not to the HS baby daddy). It's funny because even though so much time has passed, we both still remember each others childhood secrets. I really wish my parents hadn't made me stop being her friend all those years ago.
Why the hostility from your parents?
Once the baby was born it should have been all about moving forward and not looking back.
Im a parent and I would never let my kid maintain a close relationship with a pregnant 14 year old. Or attend a shower. This is not normal or acceptable behavior. Its proven that more normalized this becomes the more likely girls are to get pregnant and think its cool. Its not.
Yes, it's best just to shame and isolate the child. That will certainly ensure a great future for her and her baby. /s
NP here. Honestly, I wouldn't care what happens with the teen mom and baby. My interest would be in protecting my child. Who would want their kid to be around someone who makes such bad decisions? Clearly, the teen mom would potentially be a bad influence on my child (all teens are affected by what their peers do).
As my father used to say, you lay down with dogs, you wake up with fleas.
I'd rather use it as an opportunity to have an open discussion with my kid about sex and its consequences, and to teach compassion and kindness.
Thank you. Glad to see some kindness and decency on this board.
Anonymous
05/15/2018 19:54
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:One of my childhood best friends got pregnant at 14 and had her baby just a month after turning 15. My parents had forbidden me from hanging out with her halfway through 6th grade when she became a "bad kid" in their eyes (got caught smoking and then got caught stealing from Icing in the mall). We still spoke but only at school and our friendship suffered because of this. She still invited me to her baby shower and I got her a gift on my own, but my parents wouldn't let me go. They thought it was appalling that her parents were carrying on as if it was a completely normal situation, throwing the showers, having a big 15th birthday party, the dad remodeling the basement to make an apartment for her and the baby's father to live in, etc. She switched to homeschool after the baby was born and we pretty much lost touch for years. She contacted me on Facebook about 3 years ago because it turned out we had another mutual friend through our kid's soccer team and FB suggested me as a friend. The baby she had in HS is turning 21 this year. That's crazy since we're both turning 36 this year. She has a 10 year old and a 6 year old now and is married (not to the HS baby daddy). It's funny because even though so much time has passed, we both still remember each others childhood secrets. I really wish my parents hadn't made me stop being her friend all those years ago.
Why the hostility from your parents?
Once the baby was born it should have been all about moving forward and not looking back.
Im a parent and I would never let my kid maintain a close relationship with a pregnant 14 year old. Or attend a shower. This is not normal or acceptable behavior. Its proven that more normalized this becomes the more likely girls are to get pregnant and think its cool. Its not.
Yes, it's best just to shame and isolate the child. That will certainly ensure a great future for her and her baby. /s
NP here. Honestly, I wouldn't care what happens with the teen mom and baby. My interest would be in protecting my child. Who would want their kid to be around someone who makes such bad decisions? Clearly, the teen mom would potentially be a bad influence on my child (all teens are affected by what their peers do).
As my father used to say, you lay down with dogs, you wake up with fleas.
I'd rather use it as an opportunity to have an open discussion with my kid about sex and its consequences, and to teach compassion and kindness.
Anonymous
05/15/2018 19:47
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
It’s really common where I grew up. My next door neighbor got pregnant at 13, had baby at 14 (that was uncommonly young).
One of my good girlfriends got pregnant at 16. A few other classmates at 17-20.
One of my good girlfriends got pregnant at 16. A few other classmates at 17-20.
Anonymous
05/15/2018 19:45
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
One of my best friends in HS got pregnant at 17. She graduated from hs, put herself through college and has gone on to an extremely successful career as a journalist. She married the father, but they divorced fairly quickly. She remarried in her 20s and had two more children. She is still with husband #2 20 years later. She is one of the most "successful" people I know.
Anonymous
05/15/2018 19:43
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:One of my childhood best friends got pregnant at 14 and had her baby just a month after turning 15. My parents had forbidden me from hanging out with her halfway through 6th grade when she became a "bad kid" in their eyes (got caught smoking and then got caught stealing from Icing in the mall). We still spoke but only at school and our friendship suffered because of this. She still invited me to her baby shower and I got her a gift on my own, but my parents wouldn't let me go. They thought it was appalling that her parents were carrying on as if it was a completely normal situation, throwing the showers, having a big 15th birthday party, the dad remodeling the basement to make an apartment for her and the baby's father to live in, etc. She switched to homeschool after the baby was born and we pretty much lost touch for years. She contacted me on Facebook about 3 years ago because it turned out we had another mutual friend through our kid's soccer team and FB suggested me as a friend. The baby she had in HS is turning 21 this year. That's crazy since we're both turning 36 this year. She has a 10 year old and a 6 year old now and is married (not to the HS baby daddy). It's funny because even though so much time has passed, we both still remember each others childhood secrets. I really wish my parents hadn't made me stop being her friend all those years ago.
Why the hostility from your parents?
Once the baby was born it should have been all about moving forward and not looking back.
Im a parent and I would never let my kid maintain a close relationship with a pregnant 14 year old. Or attend a shower. This is not normal or acceptable behavior. Its proven that more normalized this becomes the more likely girls are to get pregnant and think its cool. Its not.
Yes, it's best just to shame and isolate the child. That will certainly ensure a great future for her and her baby. /s
NP here. Honestly, I wouldn't care what happens with the teen mom and baby. My interest would be in protecting my child. Who would want their kid to be around someone who makes such bad decisions? Clearly, the teen mom would potentially be a bad influence on my child (all teens are affected by what their peers do).
As my father used to say, you lay down with dogs, you wake up with fleas.
Anonymous
05/15/2018 19:38
Subject: Anyone on here have your very 1st child as a young teenager? 14? 15? 16?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:One of my childhood best friends got pregnant at 14 and had her baby just a month after turning 15. My parents had forbidden me from hanging out with her halfway through 6th grade when she became a "bad kid" in their eyes (got caught smoking and then got caught stealing from Icing in the mall). We still spoke but only at school and our friendship suffered because of this. She still invited me to her baby shower and I got her a gift on my own, but my parents wouldn't let me go. They thought it was appalling that her parents were carrying on as if it was a completely normal situation, throwing the showers, having a big 15th birthday party, the dad remodeling the basement to make an apartment for her and the baby's father to live in, etc. She switched to homeschool after the baby was born and we pretty much lost touch for years. She contacted me on Facebook about 3 years ago because it turned out we had another mutual friend through our kid's soccer team and FB suggested me as a friend. The baby she had in HS is turning 21 this year. That's crazy since we're both turning 36 this year. She has a 10 year old and a 6 year old now and is married (not to the HS baby daddy). It's funny because even though so much time has passed, we both still remember each others childhood secrets. I really wish my parents hadn't made me stop being her friend all those years ago.
Why the hostility from your parents?
Once the baby was born it should have been all about moving forward and not looking back.
Im a parent and I would never let my kid maintain a close relationship with a pregnant 14 year old. Or attend a shower. This is not normal or acceptable behavior. Its proven that more normalized this becomes the more likely girls are to get pregnant and think its cool. Its not.
Yes, it's best just to shame and isolate the child. That will certainly ensure a great future for her and her baby. /s