Dh travels on weekdays and I say I'm "solo momming" it through the weeks. He's unreachable 99% of the time so I do feel a bit like a single mom but I don't mind. I was in the ER for 30 hours before someone could even get ahold of him.

There's a world of difference with moms, single or not, between those that have support systems and those that don't. A single mom with lots of family around may have an easier time than a married mom who only has her husband to help, especially if he travels 5 days. I agree that it's just a label, meaning you are not partnered.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the "true single mom pp"

Is the single woman who adopted by choice without a man greater than the single mom whose husband died when the infant was 2 weeks old?

Who of the two is the truer single mom?

I don’t care. What does it matter? That’s the point of my post.

I didn’t initiate the “true single mom” term. OP did. I responded.

+1
The people who are taking issue with your post are projecting- you literally said you just considered yourself a Mom and folks are losing their shit. It's like they completely missed the context of the "true single Mom" part of your post!

The only people missing the context is you two.

The "true single mom" poster wanted to make a point about how the "label" of single mom doesn't matter, but in order to do so, made that *very* distinction ("I'm a true single mom") to give herself the credibility she wanted (she's *actually* a single mom so you'd better listen up). That's EXACTLY what OP's referring to.

Ah the irony.

After I got divorced someone called me a single mom, and I thought they were nuts. She has a father. He is in the picture. There is a co-parent. So I said I was a co-parent who happened to be single relationship wise.

Single is a martial status but often it makes no sense when used as a single parent. My husband's ex used to claim that. She had a live in boyfriend who paid the rent, child support, a Dad would would take the kids any time including custody and still bitterly complained.

Anonymous wrote:Single = one.

One paycheck. One decision maker. One logistics coordinator. One retirement. One college saver. One household manger. One default parent. One boo boo kisser. One vacation planner and payer.

If your ex is present and cooperative, and you receive support, there are essentially TWO paychecks, TWO decision makers if you compare t correctly, TEO logistics coordinators, TWO college savers. I’ll give you the retirement, but not the household manager or default prent, because inevitably this sometimes falls on one parent in a two parent household.

Single = one.

One paycheck. One decision maker. One logistics coordinator. One retirement. One college saver. One household manger. One default parent. One boo boo kisser. One vacation planner and payer.

Those of you who claim to be single while married, because your husband is traveling. Is it OK if your husband tells women at the bar that he's single because you're far away?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the "true single mom pp"

Is the single woman who adopted by choice without a man greater than the single mom whose husband died when the infant was 2 weeks old?

Who of the two is the truer single mom?

I don’t care. What does it matter? That’s the point of my post.

I didn’t initiate the “true single mom” term. OP did. I responded.

+1
The people who are taking issue with your post are projecting- you literally said you just considered yourself a Mom and folks are losing their shit. It's like they completely missed the context of the "true single Mom" part of your post!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There have been many, many threads discussing who gets to claim the label of “single mom,” like it was some prize or something.

I am a “true single mom.” I adopted a newborn as a single woman and have done it all in my own. But, really, I’m a “mom.” I don’t understand the obsession with labeling what kind of mom I am.

Why did you bring this up, OP?

You so fit the stereotype of a "Single Mom By Choice" who belongs to one of those support groups that doesn't allow those of us with ex's to participate.

Yep, you have your own groups. Why would you wven want to join?

Anonymous wrote:What if you are married, with two kids, but your husband had an accident and is a quadriplegiac?

Are you a single mom?

Did you just compare a person with a disability to someone who doesn’t exist?

If your husband has a disability he is still your husband and you are still married and thus, not single.

Anonymous wrote:What if you are married, with two kids, but your husband had an accident and is a quadriplegiac?

Are you a single mom?

Sure, but you're not a "true single mom" like the PP who adopted as a single woman. None of you will measure up to that.

What if you are married, with two kids, but your husband had an accident and is a quadriplegiac?

Are you a single mom?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why can’t women just support other women, whatever their situation is? It’s not a competition. You don’t get a prize for being the worst off.

Because its always a competition between women. I hate it too pp, but it is the way it is. We're our own worst enemies.

Not the OP, but I didn't view the question as a way to compete, it was simply a question. By using the word competition, you essentially turned it into one...

Anonymous wrote:For the "true single mom pp"

Is the single woman who adopted by choice without a man greater than the single mom whose husband died when the infant was 2 weeks old?

Who of the two is the truer single mom?

I don’t care. What does it matter? That’s the point of my post.

I didn’t initiate the “true single mom” term. OP did. I responded.