Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your DD has really good SATs and GPA so she will get into PLENTY of schools even without ECs if she applies wisely. However, now may be a good time to get her to try to do something (just a little bit) outside her comfort zone – not because it will help her get into college, but because it will help her work on the anxiety while she is still at home and working with her therapist. It doesn’t have to be a competitive or performance activity either. Don’t know if you are in Montgomery County, but something like these teen writing clubs might interest your DD:
http://host.evanced.info/montgomerycountymd/evanced/eventcalendar.asp?kw=write&ln=ALL&ag=teens&nd=15

Small schools may or not be helpful for your DD because there is no correct answer. Some introverts find larger schools and larger classes more comfortable, others thrive in a smaller setting. When looking for schools, pay attention to the types of activities and opportunities available to students so that there will be something that your DD will feel comfortable getting involved in, even if it just a writing or poetry club that meets once a week. Also pay attention to the mental health services available on campus. As a mental health professional, I was amazed by the variability in this at different SLACs we toured but you definitely have to ask to get answers. Some of the “best” schools we visited had very little to help struggling students.

My DD with anxiety is doing well at St. Mary’s College of Maryland because she feels more comfortable in the small, supportive environment. She loves the campus where there are many peaceful and beautiful places to get away from it all and recharge. Also, knowing that she has the option to drive herself home anytime she needs to has really helped. She has rarely used that option, but just knowing she is relatively close to home has helped.

I know it is hard, but try not to stress over the college application process. There really is a school out there for everyone. You sound like a very caring mother who prioritizes the importance of your DDs mental health and happiness and that alone is the most important thing.

Thanks for your thoughtful response. St Mary’s is a school we will definitely consider.

Anonymous wrote:Most large State U's are numbers based. You're IN based on SAT/GPA on a sliding scale. Keep the unweighted GPA at 3.8 and above and she will have many merit aid offers. She could likely pay in-state tuition at out of state public. Also, I doubt she will have no EC's. She is likely to have something --- she's just late finding her niche. Maybe President/Officer of an Honor Society.

Anonymous wrote:What if she volunteered with much younger students? Would that be less anxiety producing? Or students with developmental delays? It would build her confidence to make a difference in others’ lives.

Anonymous wrote:My DS is very similar. He graduated from high school two years ago, had no ECs, 29 ACT and was in the top five in his class in a very small, well regarded private. What we eventually decided on was finding him a smaller LAC that was close enough to home that he could go home when he needed to.

He is now a very happy sophomore with a 3.8 GPA at a school that fits his needs and is about 45 minutes away from us. It was not as selective as some of the schools his peers decided on - but FWIW he did get into a HYPS but knew that he would not be successful there because he wouldn't have the support he needed. From what I remember, he wrote his common app essay about deciding to switch from public to private in seventh grade and feeling like he was a part of something bigger than himself for the six years he was there.

His social anxiety was so bad with the roommate situation he initially had that we were able to get a medical exemption for housing after his first semester and he now lives in an off campus apartment and has his car if he needs to come home. I would say he probably comes home every other weekend so he has a quiet familiar place to get work done.

He has found a great group of friends in his major who are all quiet, dedicated and driven to succeed - and they have all bonded further by doing charity work through their honor society and going out to dinner at different restaurants. Your DD will find her people if she's in the right environment and has support from you!

Anonymous wrote:Your DD has really good SATs and GPA so she will get into PLENTY of schools even without ECs if she applies wisely. However, now may be a good time to get her to try to do something (just a little bit) outside her comfort zone – not because it will help her get into college, but because it will help her work on the anxiety while she is still at home and working with her therapist. It doesn’t have to be a competitive or performance activity either. Don’t know if you are in Montgomery County, but something like these teen writing clubs might interest your DD:
http://host.evanced.info/montgomerycountymd/evanced/eventcalendar.asp?kw=write&ln=ALL&ag=teens&nd=15

Small schools may or not be helpful for your DD because there is no correct answer. Some introverts find larger schools and larger classes more comfortable, others thrive in a smaller setting. When looking for schools, pay attention to the types of activities and opportunities available to students so that there will be something that your DD will feel comfortable getting involved in, even if it just a writing or poetry club that meets once a week. Also pay attention to the mental health services available on campus. As a mental health professional, I was amazed by the variability in this at different SLACs we toured but you definitely have to ask to get answers. Some of the “best” schools we visited had very little to help struggling students.

My DD with anxiety is doing well at St. Mary’s College of Maryland because she feels more comfortable in the small, supportive environment. She loves the campus where there are many peaceful and beautiful places to get away from it all and recharge. Also, knowing that she has the option to drive herself home anytime she needs to has really helped. She has rarely used that option, but just knowing she is relatively close to home has helped.

I know it is hard, but try not to stress over the college application process. There really is a school out there for everyone. You sound like a very caring mother who prioritizes the importance of your DDs mental health and happiness and that alone is the most important thing.

Anonymous wrote:My DS is very similar. He graduated from high school two years ago, had no ECs, 29 ACT and was in the top five in his class in a very small, well regarded private. What we eventually decided on was finding him a smaller LAC that was close enough to home that he could go home when he needed to.

He is now a very happy sophomore with a 3.8 GPA at a school that fits his needs and is about 45 minutes away from us. It was not as selective as some of the schools his peers decided on - but FWIW he did get into a HYPS but knew that he would not be successful there because he wouldn't have the support he needed. From what I remember, he wrote his common app essay about deciding to switch from public to private in seventh grade and feeling like he was a part of something bigger than himself for the six years he was there.

His social anxiety was so bad with the roommate situation he initially had that we were able to get a medical exemption for housing after his first semester and he now lives in an off campus apartment and has his car if he needs to come home. I would say he probably comes home every other weekend so he has a quiet familiar place to get work done.

He has found a great group of friends in his major who are all quiet, dedicated and driven to succeed - and they have all bonded further by doing charity work through their honor society and going out to dinner at different restaurants. Your DD will find her people if she's in the right environment and has support from you!