switch to an all cash budget. don't use the card at all. Have cash in envelopes. When the cash is gone, you are out of money until next week.

are you getting a tax return?

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP - Do you have an actual budget where you provide an allocation amount for all expenses? You need to get one and follow one. We use an app (Home Budget) to track our expenses and we have money allocated for every category. This may help you on the control side if you know what you have allocated to spend on that category and whether you have money left that month.

[/quote]

No we don't really have a budget .. we don't track it at least. I have tried in the past but run into difficulty tracking all 3 of the spenders. My nanny has a bank card my husband and myself.
can home budget link all the spenders somehow ? or more than one person has a log in, or is it an app ? thanks very much I agree it would help a lot[/quote]

There are a number of Apps out there. We like the simplicity of HomeBudget for tracking. We figure out the budget amounts we want to set separately and just enter them into HomeBudget App and then enter expenses and they total up against the budget amounts to let you know where you are. We use the paid version of the App (it was a couple of dollars) and it syncs up what DH and I put in separately. there are a number of Apps on the market but I really like this because it gives me a monthly running total by category and I can see where I am going over.

We don't have fixed expenses like our mortgage and utilities on there because they do not change much and are not optional. We have categories for groceries, pets, restaurants and entertaining, beauty (haircuts, products, etc), household, car, and clothing. We have been doing this kind of tracking since late fall and it is eye opening and helpful.

PP
No the HHI does not include the rental income ($25K)
Okay I will take the time to go through our bank card to see where the $ is going thank you for the above break down of categories very helpful thank you

Does your $235k HHI include rental income?

Your budget is too vague to figure out where the money going. Break your budget out like this:

Mortgage 1
Mortgage 2
Utilities
Cell phones
Cable/Internet
Housekeeper
Nanny
Home Maintenance/Improvement
Car payment 1
Car payment 2
Car payment 3
Car insurance
Car fuel
Life Insurance
Student Loan (what is the balance?)
Groceries
Eating out
Entertainment
Children’s activities
Clothing
Personal maintenance (haircuts/nails/makeup)
Gym/health
Savings
529 savings
Credit card minimum payment

You could pay it off and then have the credit card company lower your credit limit. But that could adversely affect your credit score, so I wouldn't do it before buying a house or a car. (frankly, if you're maxed out, I wouldn't advise doing either of those things anyway.)

Living Expenses ... I guess the problem is they are whatever we spend .. BUT I did a budget last night and came up with this..
Monthly Expenses
Mortgages- $4,830- (own two homes one is a rental)
Cars+Insurance - $988 (own 3 cars one for nanny to use)
Monthly Utility - 878 (cell, bge, tv, internet, house cleaners)
Nanny - $2479
Life Insurance - $235.75
Student Loan - $268

Those are what have to be paid then I figure
Monthly Expenses Average
Groceries- $1200
Kids adventures- $200
That above is a total out of $11,080/ month

and we bring in after taxes and 401 k and funds - $12,500 a month
so not sure where the extra $1500 is going at the moment.
and then bonus is usually like clear $15K at year end in addition to above salary.

What do you guys think?

[quote=Anonymous]OP here , yes we have "savings" as I said enough to pay it off.. no we don't have what I would consider an "emergency fund" like I said in prior post which I consider 6 months of income. Anyway, I get it .. I have to make a change and it is up to me to do it and it is literally just will power pretty much. [/quote]

What are your monthly living expenses?

OP here , yes we have "savings" as I said enough to pay it off.. no we don't have what I would consider an "emergency fund" like I said in prior post which I consider 6 months of income. Anyway, I get it .. I have to make a change and it is up to me to do it and it is literally just will power pretty much.

This will sound dumb, but literally freeze it. Pay it off and freeze it.

My SIL & BIL had to do this. They paid theirs off, but didn't want to cut it up because of the same reason of not having an emergency fund with 3 kids. She got a huge bowl, put the card in it w/ water and froze it. Un-thawing it takes too much time to use it on frivolous purchases but not so much time that you can't get to it should a big emergency arise.

No more credit cards. Time to go debit card only for awhile.

Paying interest on a credit card is literally flushing money down the toilet. All you are doing is paying MORE for every item you buy. If you went into a store and it had two signs, one for paying $5 and one for paying $7, for the exact same thing, which would you choose? The $5 option is paying cash, for you.

There are smart ways to do debt. Credit card debt is NOT one of them. Until you are financially savvy enough to get that, you should not allow yourself to carry any sort of credit card balance.

Steps:
Pay off the credit card entirely.
Make savings a priority. Make sure you have a 6 month emergency fund. DO NOT SPEND THIS.
After that, you can start seeing how your finances look. What other debt do you have? Work towards paying it off.
Do not use credit cards again until you have a secure handle on things, so I'd say maybe in 5 years.

Do you have savings or not? You say you do, but in a previous post you said you had no emergency savings.

Pay off and close the cards. Save an emergency fund.

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here- I like the idea of paying it down half then calling and having them lower my limit .. 13K may not be terrible but it is a lot to me. We have a HHI of 235k and both work with 3 children I need to get this under control.
I am also going to employ the buy nothing month and see if I can break the cycle.
[/quote]

You are a disaster. On that income you should not be using credit, except for your home. Period. The end.

You need Dave Ramsey and a psychologist to figure out why you find such happiness in such shallow endeavors as shopping.

No gimmicks, no ice, no safe deposit boxes, none of that BS. Pay off the card, cancel it, and set up automatic deposits into a savings account.

What does your retirement look like? Your kids 529? I'm betting weak to non null.[/quote]

Yikes ! I mean maybe I need you to be so unfriendly but perhaps not.. our retirement and kids 529s are fully funded. Like I said in the beginning we have the savings in an account I am just nervous to use it to pay off the CC cause I think I will just rack it up again and I am trying to stop the cycle. I appreciate the helpful responses on here and I am going to employ a budgeting app today as another user suggested.

OP, good for your for recognizing you want to break the cycle. This is the money columnist for the Washington Post:
http://www.michellesingletary.com/21-day-financial-fast.html

She is quite conservative with risk and savings, which sounds like what you need to "reset" yourself and stop using that credit card

If you are local and okay with going through a church, you could go to her in person seminars:
http://www.prosperitypartnersministry.org/calendar-prosperity-partners-ministry

[quote=Anonymous]OP here- I like the idea of paying it down half then calling and having them lower my limit .. 13K may not be terrible but it is a lot to me. We have a HHI of 235k and both work with 3 children I need to get this under control.
I am also going to employ the buy nothing month and see if I can break the cycle.
[/quote]

You are a disaster. On that income you should not be using credit, except for your home. Period. The end.

You need Dave Ramsey and a psychologist to figure out why you find such happiness in such shallow endeavors as shopping.

No gimmicks, no ice, no safe deposit boxes, none of that BS. Pay off the card, cancel it, and set up automatic deposits into a savings account.

What does your retirement look like? Your kids 529? I'm betting weak to non null.

[quote=Anonymous]OP - Do you have an actual budget where you provide an allocation amount for all expenses? You need to get one and follow one. We use an app (Home Budget) to track our expenses and we have money allocated for every category. This may help you on the control side if you know what you have allocated to spend on that category and whether you have money left that month.

[/quote]

No we don't really have a budget .. we don't track it at least. I have tried in the past but run into difficulty tracking all 3 of the spenders. My nanny has a bank card my husband and myself.
can home budget link all the spenders somehow ? or more than one person has a log in, or is it an app ? thanks very much I agree it would help a lot