Anonymous wrote:Your soon googled those pictures intentionally. Maybe he didn't fully expect to see what he saw, but he was not googling mint candy. I'm with the pp who thinks he heard some other boys talking about this stuff at school and wanted to find out for himself.

Or someone else in your house is googling that stuff intentionally and it was a saved search and he clicked on it. Either way you have a problem.

Other possibility is your son was chatting with or on a website he shouldnt have been and someone sent him the image.

Your soon googled those pictures intentionally. Maybe he didn't fully expect to see what he saw, but he was not googling mint candy. I'm with the pp who thinks he heard some other boys talking about this stuff at school and wanted to find out for himself.

Or someone else in your house is googling that stuff intentionally and it was a saved search and he clicked on it. Either way you have a problem.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^^If this is it, op you need to expose your kid to the broader world. He should know that some men dress like women. And most men have a penis. If it wa truly just a guy lounging there, it shouldn’t be all that distressing.

This is OP. You cannot be serious. An 11 y/o kid does not need to see a woman with a huge dick. That's not the same thing as knowing that there are people who are different in the world. He doesn't need to see anyone naked right now. He doesn't need sexual images in his world right now. He certainly does not need that cognitive dissonance of a woman with a penis right now.

I am a 49 yo woman and confused by it. Why does a gay man want to have sex with a man that has boobs and dresses like a woman?

the majority who abuse these men aren't gay men.

Don’t mirror his fear and anxiety - he will take his cues from you. Be calm and matter-of-fact as you comfort him. Explain what he saw in simple terms - a lot of his fear is rooted in what he doesn’t know or understand, and if you are also tearing up and silent then it’s just going to magnify itself in his mind and be so much worse.

Sit him down, Be matter-of-fact and explain what he saw in a way he can understand. Thankfully, he didn’t witness an actual sex act - that would make things harder. Hopefully, if your DS has some facts, he’ll perceive what he saw through a different lens and that will calm his fear.

Don’t let this be an elephant in the room. Keep your cool and talk with your DS, even if he’s resisting. It’s important.

Anonymous wrote:OP, I totally agree that your son had no need to see this. But crying and being frightened seems extreme -- rather than curious, confused, and grossed out. Is there something else going on with him? Is he unusually sensitive?

The boy looked up the image on purpose. He thought he could sneak it by mom , but when he noticed she was watching. He"screamed & cried and came up with the mint candy story to stay out of trouble.

OP, I totally agree that your son had no need to see this. But crying and being frightened seems extreme -- rather than curious, confused, and grossed out. Is there something else going on with him? Is he unusually sensitive?

Anonymous wrote:Your son is lying to you about what he was googling. This image just doesn't appear when you are googling mint candy.

He may have heard the phrase at school and wanted to check it out for himself out of curiosity.

Your son is looking up porn intentionally and you need to address that.

11 is young, but it's not so young that he is not curious about sex and naked bodies etc. Porn is no good , but it's readily available and how many people get trapped in it is my trying to find answers to their normal age appropriate questions.

You need to be talking to your son and stop thinking of him as a baby.

+1

Kid is naive. So is mama.

What he needed to know at 11 before being upset is different from what he needs to know now.

What kind of delicate snowflake are you raising that he CRIED? I mean, holy shit.

Your son is lying to you about what he was googling. This image just doesn't appear when you are googling mint candy.

He may have heard the phrase at school and wanted to check it out for himself out of curiosity.

Your son is looking up porn intentionally and you need to address that.

11 is young, but it's not so young that he is not curious about sex and naked bodies etc. Porn is no good , but it's readily available and how many people get trapped in it is my trying to find answers to their normal age appropriate questions.

You need to be talking to your son and stop thinking of him as a baby.

Yes, clearly the best thing to do is use it as a teaching moment. There are many kids who identify as non-binary. Just explain in simple terms.

Tell him to beware women in sundresses

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^^If this is it, op you need to expose your kid to the broader world. He should know that some men dress like women. And most men have a penis. If it wa truly just a guy lounging there, it shouldn’t be all that distressing.

This is OP. You cannot be serious. An 11 y/o kid does not need to see a woman with a huge dick. That's not the same thing as knowing that there are people who are different in the world. He doesn't need to see anyone naked right now. He doesn't need sexual images in his world right now. He certainly does not need that cognitive dissonance of a woman with a penis right now.

Not to split hairs here, but there is no such thing.

Poor kid. Op this was going to happen sooner or later. This crap is out there now for all to see. Tell them that there are weird adults who post pictures of themselves doing things that even you don't understand. If he runs across something like that again, don't look and close it as fast as he can.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^^^If this is it, op you need to expose your kid to the broader world. He should know that some men dress like women. And most men have a penis. If it wa truly just a guy lounging there, it shouldn’t be all that distressing.

Nope. Nope. Nope.

No one needs to use porn to teach children. You are a sicko.

Sicko? He’s already seen it. I’m not suggesting pulling up an image. Op needs to explain it, which would be a heck of a lot easier if he already knew the two facts mentioned above.

Anonymous wrote:^^^^If this is it, op you need to expose your kid to the broader world. He should know that some men dress like women. And most men have a penis. If it wa truly just a guy lounging there, it shouldn’t be all that distressing.

Nope. Nope. Nope.

No one needs to use porn to teach children. You are a sicko.