Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are preschoolers so we haven't had to deal with this yet, but now you've got me thinking.

I think I'd probably ask them, "what should Larlo call you?" and I'd encourage my kids to ask the same question. What does everyone think about that?

Personally, I'd be happy if other kids called me my first name. I don't want them to call me Mrs. Larlos-last-name because I never use that - I didn't change my name when I got married and I have a PhD anyway (which our kids' friends would probably never know) so if we're really being formal then my title is Dr, which I find pretentious. And Mr. Larlos-last-name won't work for my husband since the kids have my last name and not his.

I'd be okay with my kids calling them Mr or Mrs whatever, if that's what they asked to be called, but honestly I probably wouldn't be encouraging those friendships because I'd think they're a bunch of snobs. Kids calling them by their first name when they haven't been invited to do so is rude though, I agree.

And btw for the "social class", "unclutured" (sic) PP above, we've traveled extensively, lived on multiple continents, my kids have several citizenships, and we both have graduate degrees from good schools in challenging fields.

Anonymous wrote:Usually Ms Firstname and Mr Lastname or I get a lot of “hi Sally’s Mom! Hey sally’s Mom can I have a snack?”

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All first names, they usually ask and often refer to them as "Sam's mom or dad" but not a single one of their friends parents has asked or required being Mr or Mrs X. You all sound so old fashioned.

I think it's a social class thing. My kids are exposed socially in a lot of formal settings often times with familiar people. They have had to learn proper social graces. They would appear unclutured, rude, and common if they didn't address adults in a way that is socially appropriate.

Anonymous wrote:My kids are preschoolers so we haven't had to deal with this yet, but now you've got me thinking.

I think I'd probably ask them, "what should Larlo call you?" and I'd encourage my kids to ask the same question. What does everyone think about that?

Personally, I'd be happy if other kids called me my first name. I don't want them to call me Mrs. Larlos-last-name because I never use that - I didn't change my name when I got married and I have a PhD anyway (which our kids' friends would probably never know) so if we're really being formal then my title is Dr, which I find pretentious. And Mr. Larlos-last-name won't work for my husband since the kids have my last name and not his.

I'd be okay with my kids calling them Mr or Mrs whatever, if that's what they asked to be called, but honestly I probably wouldn't be encouraging those friendships because I'd think they're a bunch of snobs. Kids calling them by their first name when they haven't been invited to do so is rude though, I agree.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All first names, they usually ask and often refer to them as "Sam's mom or dad" but not a single one of their friends parents has asked or required being Mr or Mrs X. You all sound so old fashioned.

I think it's a social class thing. My kids are exposed socially in a lot of formal settings often times with familiar people. They have had to learn proper social graces. They would appear unclutured, rude, and common if they didn't address adults in a way that is socially appropriate.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless a parent indicates otherwise, we emphasize the use of "Mr. and Mrs. Lastname."

We've found a lot of our younger DD's friends use "Miss First Name or Mr. First Name". Which drives me nuts. We aren't your preschool teachers.

Mr/Mrs first name for us. Why are preschool teachers less deserving of respect than you?

Anonymous wrote:All first names, they usually ask and often refer to them as "Sam's mom or dad" but not a single one of their friends parents has asked or required being Mr or Mrs X. You all sound so old fashioned.