Anonymous wrote:Taking a different angle here. Your DD may feel like I did as a teen. I didn't have sex until college. I remember being completely confused by the idea that people could get "caught up in the moment" and have unprotected sex. Seemed totally bizzare to me because I knew the risk of getting pregnant and how it would impact my life. I knew that no amount of making out and foreplay was going to have me take that risk. I really just didn't understand how that could happen. Tell her to be prepared to use condoms and make sure she knows about the morning after pill (God forbid she ever find herself in a situation she can't control).

I was like this as well. Nowhere near ready as 15, the guys I knew in high school just did not get me that excited. Even when I did lose my virginity, I got myself to student health services, had an exam, and waited through the window for it to start taking effect before actually having sex. I was confident enough in my own bodily autonomy to tell my partner that was the timeline, and would not have stayed with someone who didn't respect me that way.

OP, I think it's important to show your DD that HER choices are worthy of respect, not pressure her to take the pill because "everyone's doing it." How do you expect her to stand up for what she wants with men if her own mother doesn't respect her wishes about her own body? Set an example! Just let her know about PP's recommendations, and also how long it takes for the pill to be effective when you start it, and let her make her own decisions.

Taking a different angle here. Your DD may feel like I did as a teen. I didn't have sex until college. I remember being completely confused by the idea that people could get "caught up in the moment" and have unprotected sex. Seemed totally bizzare to me because I knew the risk of getting pregnant and how it would impact my life. I knew that no amount of making out and foreplay was going to have me take that risk. I really just didn't understand how that could happen. Tell her to be prepared to use condoms and make sure she knows about the morning after pill (God forbid she ever find herself in a situation she can't control).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you know why she doesn’t want to be on birth control? Have you suggested an iud, which is much less cumbersome, generally comes with fewer undesirable side effects, and does not increase the risk of blood clots, which, as a previous poster mentioned, is a legitimate concern.

OMG don't give a 15-year-old an IUD. Jesus. Why would you put her through that?

NP. It’s not a traumatic event ffs. Quit being such a drama queen. Would you rather she be unreliable with the pill or condoms and get pregnant? Why would you put her through that?

I would definitely not force her onto birth control. That’s insane. It’s her body. But a good compromise would be waiting until she’s ready then choosing a method more foolproof than the pill, which would include IUDs. It sounds like OP is concerned about the habits and consistency needed for the pill, and the IUD would eliminate the oops factor.

Er, no. Where did you get that? It sounds to me like OP is concerned with her daughter has a brain and is saying that she doesn't want to put some unnecessary drug into her body for no reason, also probably doesn't enjoy discussing her sex life with her mother, and probably also doesn't enjoy trying to convince her mother that she isn't a skank like her older sisters and that her mother should leave her alone to be a 15 year old girl.

Do not make her. Just let her know thecoption is always there if she wants it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you know why she doesn’t want to be on birth control? Have you suggested an iud, which is much less cumbersome, generally comes with fewer undesirable side effects, and does not increase the risk of blood clots, which, as a previous poster mentioned, is a legitimate concern.

OMG don't give a 15-year-old an IUD. Jesus. Why would you put her through that?

NP. It’s not a traumatic event ffs. Quit being such a drama queen. Would you rather she be unreliable with the pill or condoms and get pregnant? Why would you put her through that?

I would definitely not force her onto birth control. That’s insane. It’s her body. But a good compromise would be waiting until she’s ready then choosing a method more foolproof than the pill, which would include IUDs. It sounds like OP is concerned about the habits and consistency needed for the pill, and the IUD would eliminate the oops factor.

Anonymous wrote:P.S. No sane pediatrician will put a 15 year old girl on birth control for no reason at all except that she has a nutcase mother.

+100

And I hope they would talk to the girl before prescribing it.

Also, is she going to stand there and force her daughter to swallow the pills?

This is so f@cked up beyond belief. Subjecting the kid to hormones for no reason.

This has to be a troll post. No one would be forcing birth control on their DD. how weird.

Anonymous wrote:This just proves that DCUM is hillbilly heaven

Indeed. The MD/PhD kind of hillbillies, who have a modicum of respect for their child as well as knowledge of pharmacology.

Anonymous wrote:This just proves that DCUM is hillbilly heaven

How does it prove that? The vast majority of PPs think the OP is a total nutcase.

This just proves that DCUM is hillbilly heaven

Anonymous wrote:OP here.
I'm aware of side effects. Her doctor would be very thorough about those, so that's not a concern. She also knows about condoms, but those aren't 100% especially in the heat of the moment. DD is responsible, but she's a teen.
I don't want to force it on her, but I'd prefer to get ahead of things.

You are nuts. Why aren't side effects from hormones a concern to you? Not everyone feels good taking a pill a day. Saying "I don't need to introduce foreign substances into my body for no reason" is legit. If she gets a boyfriend, she can make a new decision.

Are you always this intrusive?


You need to learn boundaries.

Anonymous wrote:Do you know why she doesn’t want to be on birth control? Have you suggested an iud, which is much less cumbersome, generally comes with fewer undesirable side effects, and does not increase the risk of blood clots, which, as a previous poster mentioned, is a legitimate concern.

OMG don't give a 15-year-old an IUD. Jesus. Why would you put her through that?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do not force her on birth control! I have a genetic clotting condition (factor 5) that’s really common and not routinely tested for. When I was diagnosed as an adult, my doctor said I was lucky to have never been on the pill as it could have killed me. There can be other dangerous or unpleasant side effects as well...crazy and insulting to subject a teen who is not sexually active to that against her will.

Your highly unusual condition is hardly a reason for op's daughter to avoid the pill.

It’s not as unusual as you think.
Other side effects include depression, lower sex drive, bloating and even altering who you might pick as a mate.

https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/birth-control-pills-affect-womens-taste/
It’s not like drinking water you know. You are totally crazy to be pushing this on your DD!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wtf?
You are bizarre.
There are a lot of health consequences to going on the pill. Bad side effects etc.
She isn't even having sex!
If she decides to have sex, she should explore options with a doctor. The pill may not be the best choice.
And she should use condoms if she has sex.

You sound kind of bizarre. Of course OP's daughter should use condoms, but two forms of birth control prevents those "oops" situations. Encouraging the Pill is not at all bizarre.

I think PP was trying to say that everyone who is on the pill should ALSO use a condom. The pill does not prevent STDs, condoms do.