Anonymous wrote:Anyone wonder if this post was from the mom murdered in Reston?

I was wondering the same thing.

I feel so bad for that family!

Anyone wonder if this post was from the mom murdered in Reston?

Anonymous wrote:Why is everybody assuming that the high schooler in the OP is a girl who is dating a male loser?

Exactly. Plenty of female losers out there.

Anonymous wrote:My sister's first boyfriend was an exciting loser. She was 17, he was mid-20s. He never went to college, had crappy minimum wage jobs, rode a motorcycle, sold pot at the mall.

My parents evident disapproval did nothing to deter this, though they never flat-out forbade her to see him.

Eventually she went off to college in another state, met other non-loser guys, and broke up with him. He tried to convince her to drop out and move in with him, but no deal.

Ultimately her good judgment prevailed. That's pretty much what you have to count on. There is simply no way you're going to stop her from having sex with this guy if she's determined to do so.

+1
This was my own experience when in college and dating a loser. I was infatuated though, and nothing my parents said could drag me away from him... until I graduated and started working. All of a sudden, I met interesting, responsible, intelligent, guys who were actually going somewhere in life. I was still dating the loser, but I started looking at him with new eyes and realized how much I was selling myself short. We broke up and I started dating the man I eventually married - who was the same age as the loser, but an actual "man," rather than a man-child who didn't want to grow up. Sometimes it takes getting out in the world to see what you're missing by dating a loser.

Anonymous wrote:It depends...is the loser male or female? It’s socially acceptable to push the male losers away, but if it a female losers it’s really hard.

THIS x100. My son had to deal with a girl who would not take no for an answer. They were friends, but she wanted much more. He kept saying no, as nicely as possible. Finally, after she had bothered him for weeks, he very bluntly told her, "We are not dating. That is final." She went off the deep end, started spreading rumors about him, and got all her friends to gang up on him for "being cruel" to her. It was unbelievable. Luckily, he had plenty of friends who understood what a nutcase she was, and he was able to cut her and her outraged, looney friends out of his life.

Imagine if the gender roles here had been reversed - a boy constantly hounding a girl to date him, refusing to take no for an answer. I imagine most parents here would have involved the administration, guidance counselors, and the boy's parents. He would have been shamed, punished, ostracized for his persistence. None of that happens when the girl is the aggressor (which is the case much of the time in middle and high school). No one wants to admit that a girl could do something so rotten, but it happens. They need to be punished just as a male aggressor would be.

Our jobs as parents of older teens is not to cock block them. It is to ensure they have the information they need to make good decisions about sex and access to birth control. They will soon be on their own and they need to know we have their backs -no matter what.

I will act like I escaped from an asylum wheb I invite him over, act super creepy, and then threaten to cut his manhood off while I chop vegetables like Lorraina Bobbit. If that does not scare him off, we go in a ride in my car to a graveyard and I force him to walk the graveyard at night with me while I continue to creep him out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is everybody assuming that the high schooler in the OP is a girl who is dating a male loser?

If your son wants to pump and dump some skank, who cares?

Those skanks get pregnant at 17-20 because they hate school and see no future outside of having kids. All the better if the baby daddy has a future and family money. They don't hide this either, look at their social media, they follow all kinds of cute baby accounts.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My dad conveniently cleaned his rifles any time a boy came to pick me up.

“I’ve got a .45 and a shovel, and I doubt anyone would miss you.”

Haha that is one of my favorite movie quotes ever.

Ha! I literally do have both!

I tell my DW, I will need to have a conversation with the young man... something like this...

"Now, I need to make something very clear young man. Our no-returns policy."


Best way to make her not want to date that loser is to tell her you think he is perfect and ask her why she's not dating him. Bam. She'll go right off of the idea.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is everybody assuming that the high schooler in the OP is a girl who is dating a male loser?

If your son wants to pump and dump some skank, who cares?

Me

Anonymous wrote:Why is everybody assuming that the high schooler in the OP is a girl who is dating a male loser?

If your son wants to pump and dump some skank, who cares?

Start inviting the loser to do things with your family. Things like going to classical music concerts, plays, and trips to the botanical garden. You get my drift. Invite him/her into the fold. Invite his/her parents over for coffee. They will drift away in short time.

Why is everybody assuming that the high schooler in the OP is a girl who is dating a male loser?

NE boarding school.