Anonymous wrote:I did in my 20s for about six months. He would come over once a month, we would make small talk then jump in bed, then he would leave and I would cry and feel like total crap. And we wouldn’t talk until the following month.

Cutting it off entirely was one of the better decisions I have made.

Yup. All you are doing is sharing yourself with someone who has rejected you at some level.

No. When I leave, I never look back. They can find someone else, because I've already moved on.

Sounds to me like you should steer clear of him OP. You probably dodged a bullet.

I miss the fantastic sex I had with one ex, but I'm very aware that we wouldn't have lasted. I try to just be glad I had the experience of fabulous sex with that relationship (while married to a MUCH better man, who just isn't as good a lover.)

Hang in there until you don't miss him so much. Get the hitachi magic wand in the meantime.

I did this but only because we became long distance fwb.

he may not be a player. he drop up with you and already hurt you, he may have gone along a little with not wanting to hurt you more by immediately negatively dismissing you when you asked if you could still get together. He sounds like he doesn't' want anything to continue.

Just end it. No more contact.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my 20s. On and off in between other reltionships. Eventually we realized we would never find "the one" if we kept having this ongoing thing to fall back on. We stayed friends, but not physical, and in the next year we both met other people - my now husband, and he had a long term girlfriend, and after that his now wife. We are still friends, but breaking off the benefits part was good for both of us to proceed into healthier relationships.

NP... Why weren't you a couple? And how do you now continue to be friends? Doesn't it feel weird?

I'm asking because I'm considering starting a business with an ex (we're both now married, no chance/interest in getting together), but I think it would just be weird.

We just weren't meant to be. In college and beyond we had similar interests and just had a lot of fun together. But I guess we both had little quirks that we couldnt get past that caused bickering. And general bigger values/religion/long term goals that were not aligned. We always had/have fun together, but we are not couple material.

I adore him as a person and think his wife is a wonderful person and a good fit for him. My husband and I are a good team in a way that the ex and I never were.

This isn't for everyone, I know. But we are mature enough and our spouses have and respect co ed friendships.

Anonymous wrote:Are you the OP of the thread about being broken up with because your ex is an addict in recovery?

I hate posts like this, where people always try to relate it to other threads. Deal with this particular thread.