Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 16:02     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

ZachF wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had happy years married and miserable years married. The miserable years were made worse because I could remember when ex was a decent, mostly sane person. Averaging all those years, probably slightly happier married but you have to manufacture your own happiness. I was very lonely and isolated the last 8 years of the marriage.

Now I'm not lonely, and looking forward to a great relationship with a younger, tighter, more successful woman.


You sound like a lovely person.


Because I want what's best for me, for a change?


NP. Because you're an annoying delusional loser


What is so delusional about wanting to choose a better partner next time, after suffering one who wasn't? This option is available to all single people. It's a driving force in the decision to get divorced. The choice between years of worsening misery in a bad relationship, or getting out of the relationship and being free to pursue someone better.


NP here, but I think people are objecting to his goals: "younger, tighter, more successful". It sounds shallow. I think if he'd said "more fun, loving, and generous" no one would have objected.
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 15:54     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

On the surface I am always happy, but deep down I am only happy when someone loves me back.
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 15:53     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

Much happier happily married than single but my mom would be 10x happier divorced from my dad than in their miserable marriage. So it depends on how happy the marriage is.
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 15:46     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I was never one of those girls that always had to be dating somebody. So I am happy single. I did get married and I loved being married (22 years). But now I am getting a divorce and I look forward to being single again, not because I want to date, but I am so sick of having to coordinate every single minutia of my life with somebody else.

The real answer is I am always happy and my life situation does not dictate my happiness. I find the good in my situation and love my life whether single or married.


Why are you divorcing? Did you initiate the divorce or did he? Do you have children?


He cheated. Yes (I guess) but not really. Yes... off to college.
ZachF
Post 09/06/2017 15:39     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had happy years married and miserable years married. The miserable years were made worse because I could remember when ex was a decent, mostly sane person. Averaging all those years, probably slightly happier married but you have to manufacture your own happiness. I was very lonely and isolated the last 8 years of the marriage.

Now I'm not lonely, and looking forward to a great relationship with a younger, tighter, more successful woman.


You sound like a lovely person.


Because I want what's best for me, for a change?


NP. Because you're an annoying delusional loser


What is so delusional about wanting to choose a better partner next time, after suffering one who wasn't? This option is available to all single people. It's a driving force in the decision to get divorced. The choice between years of worsening misery in a bad relationship, or getting out of the relationship and being free to pursue someone better.
ZachF
Post 09/06/2017 15:35     Subject: When were you happier? Married or single?

Single and in a good relationship that either of us could end at any time if it doesn't work. Not married and trapped in a bad one that isn't so easy to get out of. I'll never marry again. Done raising kids. There isn't enough value to marriage to ever convince me to do that again.
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 13:11     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

Anonymous wrote:I was never one of those girls that always had to be dating somebody. So I am happy single. I did get married and I loved being married (22 years). But now I am getting a divorce and I look forward to being single again, not because I want to date, but I am so sick of having to coordinate every single minutia of my life with somebody else.

The real answer is I am always happy and my life situation does not dictate my happiness. I find the good in my situation and love my life whether single or married.


Why are you divorcing? Did you initiate the divorce or did he? Do you have children?
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 13:00     Subject: When were you happier? Married or single?

I love being in a relationship, and most of my life that has meant married. I don't mind, for the most part. Mostly I've been happy. Some bits have been extremely difficult, unhappy, and I wanted to end it. But remembering that there were good bits was helpful to keep me in it.

Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 12:45     Subject: When were you happier? Married or single?

I love being married but I was also happy single.
The only time i was really miserable was when i was in a bad relationship.
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 12:24     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

Love my husband but I was happier and more 'at peace' being single. I married after 30 and was content and happy where i was. I enjoyed and still enjoy DH company but man, I LOVED my alone time, being able to come and go as I please without having to tell someone; being able to spend $250 on a pair of killer boots just because without anyone giving me the side-eye (i only bought stuff (and still do) i could afford so save the judgement).
I love having someone to do stuff with, but to be honest, we are a bit too opposite in some ways. THings that made me love him to begin with are growing more annoying overtime. I want to move, he never does. I want to travel more, he doesn't. I want to have some alone time, he never does. I want to clean the house on a saturday morning, he does not. I want to keep a clean house clean for longer than 2 minutes, he doesn't care.
I love that he is more laid back and easy going and he has made me a better person in some reguards, but i do feel like a little part of who I am died over the years. Compromise is great, but to think that over time that doesn't kill a bit of who you are is not true.
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 10:00     Subject: When were you happier? Married or single?

I am divorced and happily dating someone but probably won't get married again.

Happiest exactly right now. Single. I have a great life, and I'm in control of it.

Good luck, OP!

Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 09:32     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

I was never one of those girls that always had to be dating somebody. So I am happy single. I did get married and I loved being married (22 years). But now I am getting a divorce and I look forward to being single again, not because I want to date, but I am so sick of having to coordinate every single minutia of my life with somebody else.

The real answer is I am always happy and my life situation does not dictate my happiness. I find the good in my situation and love my life whether single or married.
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 09:28     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

That's a complicated question. I guess married, but I'd love to be as young as I was when I was single.
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 09:24     Subject: Re:When were you happier? Married or single?

I find nothing lonlier than a bad relationship.
Anonymous
Post 09/06/2017 08:56     Subject: When were you happier? Married or single?

Anonymous wrote:I've been single, married and widowed. Most happy married.


Same