Anonymous wrote:If I had to go to classes every night, I would feel like I never had any downtime. Are these classes required or optional?

+1 get rid of the classes and enjoy your evenings resting at home

Meal prep and planning will help with the after-work frazzled feeling. DH is a much better cook than I am, but I want to get better (and tend to get home earlier than he does). We plot out 2-3 recipies that I can handle (this week, I'm doing homemade pizza with premade cauliflower crust and and a simple salmon dish with asparagus). He takes 2 nights and preps them so all I have to do is heat them up, pop them in the oven, etc. I had similar after-work frazzlies and that helped quell some of my stress.

OP.
To answer a couple of questions. My son will continue to go to the same daycare he is at now once school starts so it will continue to make sense for me to do pick ups and drop offs if I stay at my current position and job. As far as our ability to outsource goes we had done that right after our son was born but then once he got a bit older we stopped having a maid come. We may need to reevaluate that choice maybe go to two times a month just to help with some of the deep cleaning stuff. The two classes a week will be ending here soon but with school starting I know there will be plenty of other activities and things and homework and to be honest I am already dreading the school year. I think I need to make a decision if I want to keep a managerial position or not. Working in the human service field does not pay a lot even at the manager level so while I would be taking a pay cut it would not be tens of thousands of dollars. I think I am going to have husband and I write out the things that we do daily weekly monthly just to kind of see where some of this division of labor lies. I tend to think that I get the brunt of it but maybe he feels the same about himself. He does do the mowing and yardwork but I get just as many oil changes for the cars I do groceries along with all of the household tasks so I do think that seeing it on paper may make him realize how many things that I do just to keep our lives running the way they currently are. That brings me to number two do we want things to continue running the way they are. I mean our house isn't spotless or immaculate but it is picked up the rooms are all nicely painted dishes are put away at the end of the night and so on and so forth maybe that is no longer a realistic picture of what our household will be. And we need to decide if we want to little more chaotic household but have more free time or what we want to do. Thanks to everyone for their feedback and I agree we do tend to put work first and then try to balance our life around that. I guess that is possibly the larger question I am asking do I want to continue with my current work and how my life try to balance around it or do I want to pick a life I want and adjust my work to fit around that. I'm going to meet with my therapist next week maybe get some of this out to a neutral third-party will help as well thank you