I really like the idea of creating a list and emailing it to each other. That way it can be communicated without any emotion, it is just a simple statement of what needs to be done. I have never really done this with my husband but as our kids are getting older I find it much more stressful to remember everything, softball, golf matches, doctors appointments. I think this method is a gentle reminder to one another about what needs to get done. Hope you can find a system that works well for you! Blessings!

Yes. It we did this when we moved in together well. Wrote marriage and kids. Laid out what needs to be done on a weekly/monthly/yearly basis. And then talked over who will own that task. We talk all the time and the flexibility comes when we need to change the plan or someone takes the task for a while for whatever reason. We have a master home improvement list with costs and time and when we want it done. We get through it a little at a time. When the baby came things shifted but we both strive to be fair and the lists make us aware of all that needs to be taken care of. Granted we are both planners and list people. We do the same with budget items.

Anonymous wrote:I just sit back until wifey tells me what to do and then half the time I do it.

And this is why wives treat their men like children. Why do you have to be asked? It's exhausting having to nag someone you want to have sex with.

My husband has ADD. I made the chore list. He never did his half. I tried everything (letting the mess stay, chalkboard schedule on the wall, reminder alarms), nada.

I think it depends on your partner's temperament. If he wants to split chores fairly, he'll be open to it. If he doesn't, may be best to just let him own his messes.

I just sit back until wifey tells me what to do and then half the time I do it.