Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't you have a calendar notice you are required to send out in advance for personal time off, appointments, vacations?? If you already notified your boss in writing regarding your personal meeting schedule before the company meeting invite was sent then you should be fine. If you didn't notify them then you messed up (: i've messed up before too and regretted it. It is best to send a calendar notice the same immediately after you make your personal appointments etc. That said, your kids come first. Do whatever you have to do to attend your child's meeting.

I would attend the school meeting. But I've learned the hard way to block off my calendar when I have a personal appointment that can't be missed. I don't say what it is, I just put in a calendar item that says "personal." You can even say "private" if you'd rather.

Same and I code it as out of office so people don't try to double book me.

Anonymous wrote:Don't you have a calendar notice you are required to send out in advance for personal time off, appointments, vacations?? If you already notified your boss in writing regarding your personal meeting schedule before the company meeting invite was sent then you should be fine. If you didn't notify them then you messed up (: i've messed up before too and regretted it. It is best to send a calendar notice the same immediately after you make your personal appointments etc. That said, your kids come first. Do whatever you have to do to attend your child's meeting.

I would attend the school meeting. But I've learned the hard way to block off my calendar when I have a personal appointment that can't be missed. I don't say what it is, I just put in a calendar item that says "personal." You can even say "private" if you'd rather.

Anonymous wrote:You say

At least at my office, big meetings like this are labeled mandatory because they know that most people wouldn't take the time to walk down the hallway and meet the big-boss (because we don't really care about that big boss). It's not intended to make someone miss a major family appointment or vacation or anything like that.

+1 Totally this. I probably wouldn't even address it unless someone mentioned it to me or it was a very small group mandatory meeting - 50+ people? Nope.

You say
I'm so sorry Bob, but I'm not able to make the mandatory meeting. I have an unavoidable meeting for little Larla. I will be sure to get notes from Suzy, and if there is anything I can do before the meeting to help out, please let me know.

That's the end of it.
At least at my office, big meetings like this are labeled mandatory because they know that most people wouldn't take the time to walk down the hallway and meet the big-boss (because we don't really care about that big boss). It's not intended to make someone miss a major family appointment or vacation or anything like that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Change the school meeting. For future reference, always take off when you have an important school meeting. Don't risk that your calendar will stay clear.

Another special needs mom. She cannot change the school meeting. There are multiple teachers and administrators whose schedules had to be arranged and it's the end of the school year.

You simply and firmly tell your boss that you will have to miss that meeting, and you are sorry but as he knows you had scheduled this leave far in advance and it is a mandatory ADA and Family Friendly Leave Act protected event you cannot miss. You ask to be casually introduced to the big boss on another day.

If necessary you contact HR.

I am a parent of a SN child as well. I've been at this for years and while I know it's hard to reschedule, it can be done. The team is not there for this meeting along and the team will be together again to deal the more kids. Last thing I would want is an antagonistic relationship ship with my boss because this meeting is not a one time thing for which OP is going to need off.

I am also a mom of special needs children. The OP indicated that the school district Superintendent and the school Principal would be at the meeting.This is not a run of the mill IEP meeting. There is no way to cancel this one.

Just say you have an appointment that can't be changed. For a meeting like this it just should not be a big deal. I would not mention your legal rights unless you get push back. If you were asked to present to your CEO or meet with the a senator, that would be trickier - but what you described doesn't sound like a big deal to miss.

Anonymous wrote:DCUM has been blocking my postings because my browser blocks some of its ads, so I've lost two lengthy efforts to respond. So I'll keep this brief.

I routinely invoke the FMLA to attend school IEP mtgs. My employer is a large Federal Agency. Everything is explicit and upfront. Approval to use FMLA for such purposes is outlined in my FMLA authorization package.

ditto. I and others in my agency use FMLA for IEP related stuff.

^^ Uhmm, several posters in this chain (wrongly) asserted that FMLA cannot be invoked for school meetings, so, yeah, some folks definitely need to be educated about workplace protections.

That said I don't know enough about OP's child to know whether FMLA would apply. Moreover, I went through lengthy paperwork before invoking it for such purposes.

Anonymous wrote:DCUM has been blocking my postings because my browser blocks some of its ads, so I've lost two lengthy efforts to respond. So I'll keep this brief.

I routinely invoke the FMLA to attend school IEP mtgs. My employer is a large Federal Agency. Everything is explicit and upfront. Approval to use FMLA for such purposes is outlined in my FMLA authorization package.

I don't think anyone would suggest that OP can't use leave (FMLA or otherwise).
But if you are working as part of a team and don't want people to write you off as unreliable and/or inconsiderate, you inform them of appointments or other needed absences as early as possible. It's not clear so far if OP requested leave/blocked out the time on the schedule/whatever or not.