Anonymous
Post 06/04/2017 15:35     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Anonymous wrote:I see this between two friends of mine.
Friend B copies Friend C all the time and is obsessed with her. Copies her sayings, bigs her up constantly and feels she can't put a foot wrong, likes ALL her posts on Facebook, attends all her yoga classes throughout the week, always has to be involved in a conversation which C is in. I find it incredibly weird.


the horror!
Anonymous
Post 06/04/2017 15:33     Subject: Re:Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Anonymous wrote:I have a mom friend who copies a lot of what I do with / buy for DS. I just assume she think she I have good taste.


I have a (long distance but very close) friend I do this with and I never really thought about it. She just has pretty effortless good taste and good ideas in areas where I don't have the time, skills, or interest in trying to be original, and I trust her judgment. I assume it doesn't bother her because she'll often volunteer recommendations!

On the flip side, I have another friend whose children are younger than mine, and she'll be like "I swear I'm not trying to copy you!" when she "copies" something I've done or bought, which is pretty often. I'm glad! I like feeling like I've made good choices that people want to emulate and that work for them.

I don't post pictures of myself or my activities that often on instagram or facebook, so I don't know that someone who I'm not constantly texting with (friend 1) or see in person all the time (friend 2) would have enough info to copy me even if they wanted to.
Anonymous
Post 06/04/2017 15:24     Subject: Re:Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
I'm not sure why these things that mean a great deal to you become less meaningful when someone else does them...can't you just not look at her posts?
Anonymous
Post 06/04/2017 13:55     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Anonymous wrote:Like a single white female type of thing?

I have a friend who, if I wear a certain article of clothing, the next week she will go out and post a picture of her wearing something nearly identical to facebook. If I do a certain activity, the next week she will post a photo of her doing the same.

It happens to a staggering and almost embarrassing extent.

We used to be best friends but no longer, though we still have many mutual friends and are cordial.

At what point is it acceptable to block her, because I am sick of having styles/activities/interested coopted by someone else, harmless though it may be. It's still annoying


Unless you are under 16, in which case i get it..you need to let this one go. Take it as a high form of flattery and trust that she must feel very insecure/inadequate to copy you to that degree. Let it go, give her a break and stop acting childish! You don't have to be her best friend but be kind and always trust that everyone is fighting some kind of battle, big or small. She obviously looks up to you and that really is not so bad is it in the scheme of things!
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 22:59     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why don't you just stop following her on social media? If she copies you and you don't see her posting it, then who cares? And she'll likely never know you stopped following her.


She'll know. The thing is I have lots of photos with her and shared history and I don't want her to destroy everything in a fit of vengeance


You are such a drama queen.

Why do women create this turmoil in their lives?


Not all women. I'm shaking my head at this thread just like you are.


+ 1
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 22:37     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why don't you just stop following her on social media? If she copies you and you don't see her posting it, then who cares? And she'll likely never know you stopped following her.


She'll know. The thing is I have lots of photos with her and shared history and I don't want her to destroy everything in a fit of vengeance


You are such a drama queen.

Why do women create this turmoil in their lives?


Not all women. I'm shaking my head at this thread just like you are.
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 22:32     Subject: Re:Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
I have a mom friend who copies a lot of what I do with / buy for DS. I just assume she think she I have good taste.
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 22:23     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Anonymous wrote:Are you 13? You sound like my teen. Look at it this way--maybe you're just basic, and your "copycat" is too.


My daughter is 14 and was just telling me about being annoyed friend who copies her.
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 22:20     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Don't you think others in your social circle have noticed her copycating you and know who the Original is?


A couple do and have mentioned it to me, but... it just feels like intellectual copyright on a certain level. I mean, many of these things mean a great deal to me, and it's just constant with her. I'm really getting sick of it, but I can't see a way to solve it, other than going dark on social media, which I have done for a while, but it's really not fair to me.

How old are you? You sound like you haven't had kids yet? You need to just focus on living instead of someone you say lives away. Who would even know she copied you? Navel-gazing at its best. I could see if she were your neighbor or coworker. But lives far away? Big deal.
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 20:59     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP I have this situation, and I bet if some of the snotty pps did, they'd be just as frustrated.

It's annoying to have someone join all the clubs or groups you join, friend the same people on facebook, suddenly become an expert on issues they didn't know existed until you got involved, show up at the same activities as you, and on and on and on. It sounds petty and small, but when it happens all the time, it is very frustrating. I want to scream, "I get it lady, your life sucks. But mine's really not that much better, so no need to try to be me."

I can't block her out completely, because her husband works with mine, but I sure have limited my contact. She's on the acquaintance FB list, which has really limited the mimicry.


Yes!!! Thank you.

The snotty PPs don't bother me, i assume when you post a question about friends on DCUM you are basically asking for a lot of the unhappy, and frankly socially stunted, women on here to call you "petty", "vapid", and many of the other gendered language directed against young women. Rinse, repeat. But I do it because when you wade through the BS you can occasionally get people who give you legit advice

It's really frustrating, and I feel like, as with your situation, it makes it difficult because of social media. Putting her on an acquaintance list would be a good idea- I'm considering blocking her from instagram though, as that's where I post most of my stuff. We don't live in the same place, so if not for social media, she wouldn't have access to what I was doing.

And, as you said, it's frustrating. A lot of these things mean a lot to me, and it really cheapens everything to just have co-opt them without any meaning behind it. Like someone taking your grandmother's recipe that you cherished and claiming they invented it. It may not be rational, but it's obnoxious as all hell.


The better you become at life, the more it will reproduce. Copying you is a form of strengthening your brand. If it's you're, of course. Nothing authentic can be duplicated. Just mimicked.
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 09:56     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Anonymous wrote:Well, I'm a guy who likes style but have a terrible time putting together my own look. So I'll take style cues from other people. Directly copying the look of one person, no.


There's a difference. We all take cues from other people. Copying is different.
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 07:56     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Well, I'm a guy who likes style but have a terrible time putting together my own look. So I'll take style cues from other people. Directly copying the look of one person, no.
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 07:55     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
I see this between two friends of mine.
Friend B copies Friend C all the time and is obsessed with her. Copies her sayings, bigs her up constantly and feels she can't put a foot wrong, likes ALL her posts on Facebook, attends all her yoga classes throughout the week, always has to be involved in a conversation which C is in. I find it incredibly weird.
Anonymous
Post 06/03/2017 07:10     Subject: Have you ever had a friend that copies you?
Not a friend, but a roommate when I was in my 20s. She had mental health issues and I felt bad for her more than anything. As long as she didn't try to go full on twinsies it didn't bother me too much.