Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will encourage my DD to take a gap year, preferably as an Au Pair. We have had several Au Pairs and I'm impressed with the way the program immerses girls in new culture but in a safe(r) setting of a host family. I also like that it forces the girls to assume the role of an adult in the household in a way that is harder to do at home, teaches childcare skills, and gives them a perspective on what it takes to manage a household.

What can an American Au pair expect to earn ($) working during her gap year? I thought most Au pairs were college grads.

I was under this impression too. Most au pairs are college grads or at least have some college. Not sure I know of many au pairs that are just out of high school.

Anonymous wrote:This seems like another layer of helicoptering. A gap year your parents make you do and organize or pay for is likely to do nothing for their actual development.

Is it just the parent paying for it that bothers you? Why/how is a parent paying for college for the same aged child not "helicoptering"? Most people benefit greatly from exposure to other cultures.

I am curious as to what exactly qualifies as a "gap" year. If a kid who is a mediocre student decides to attend CC for a year to improve college chances and starts a 4 year college as a transfer student, could that kid be labeled as having taken a gap year?

This seems like another layer of helicoptering. A gap year your parents make you do and organize or pay for is likely to do nothing for their actual development.

I wish I had done this. I was part of the RMIB and after graduation, I was DONE. 2 months was just not enough time to recover. I coasted through college but I wonder "what if". I just didn't have the energy anymore to take the challenging classes, to find the meaningful extras, to get involved in campus life. What I did have the energy for was to take basic classes that were far easier than HS and watch tv. I didn't get my sh*t together until senior year and by then it was too late.

Because college is effing expensive, and the kids better be ready to buckle down and study. Giving them another year to mature, save money, or blow off steam can only be a good thing.

We have saved to allow for our kids to each take a gap year. Ideally that would be a mix of volunteering and an international internship or job of some sort in a field they may be interested in. I think that its a perfect age to pause, learn a bit about the world, and then move forward with clearer vision.

What are most kids doing during gap years? Are most of them really doing tours of Europe, or are they hanging out at home and working at the mall?

Anonymous wrote:I will encourage my DD to take a gap year, preferably as an Au Pair. We have had several Au Pairs and I'm impressed with the way the program immerses girls in new culture but in a safe(r) setting of a host family. I also like that it forces the girls to assume the role of an adult in the household in a way that is harder to do at home, teaches childcare skills, and gives them a perspective on what it takes to manage a household.

What can an American Au pair expect to earn ($) working during her gap year? I thought most Au pairs were college grads.

I think a gap year would be a great call for one of my kids. TJ student, top half of his class academically, but not top 10%. ADHD. I worry about the amount of pressure in the high school, and the sheet volume of work/ late nights/ pressure. Plus, the ADHD. I hope he decides to take a year to intern, work, save money, travel, have some downtime before college. I'm afraid that otherwise, he is going to start on a college plus grad school path already burnt out. Plus, with the ADHD, an extra year for his pre-frontal cortex to develop wouldn't hurt him at all.

I don't expect miracles. But, I think that for this specific kid, it could be beneficial. But, it will be his call. I see no point in a gap year unless the kid plans something productive and buys in.

I will encourage my DD to take a gap year, preferably as an Au Pair. We have had several Au Pairs and I'm impressed with the way the program immerses girls in new culture but in a safe(r) setting of a host family. I also like that it forces the girls to assume the role of an adult in the household in a way that is harder to do at home, teaches childcare skills, and gives them a perspective on what it takes to manage a household.

Anonymous wrote:OP, I watched my child be immature his whole life. This killed him in ninth. Now after 11th, he's grown up substantially, but I honestly feel a year off to let that brain keep catching up would do him wonders and improve the chances that he will handle college well. He doesn't want to, though.

I think people looking for miracles are mistaken, though.

Of course he doesn't want to! Most kids just want to get out of the house (and party). But parents control the purse strings.

If a kid can totally immerse in another culture for an extended period of time, and witness first-hand that people can be quite happy with few material possessions and a strong sense of family/community, the life lesson to be learned is huge. Living in the DC bubble teaches them that happiness in life is determined by how much money you make, whether you have a prestigious diploma and/or a high status job, and how nice is your house, car, vacation home, etc. Once you are exposed to a different outlook on life, it can help you see that there are many paths to happiness.

I can't see any reason not to and will be strongly encouraging my kids to do it. My DH and I both did, we are both from Europe where it is common. Both of us worked for around 6 months (he worked in a store, I was really lucky and had an amazing paid internship in the field I wanted to work in at the time), and then traveled for 6 months, taking time to study languages and volunteer in some of the places we were in. It was an amazing break from the pressures of school (I was in a very academic, Big-3 style school in my home country), and an incredible opportunity to be completely independent, meet totally different people, see new things, etc. I returned feeling refreshed and really excited to start college - and because gap years are more common where I am from (I'd say about half of the first students had done one and half not) there was a real difference between those who had and those who hadn't had gap years.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is the new name for it that is trendy. Foreign exchanges have been around for 40+ years. DH did one between HS and college in the 70's. Taking time off to save up for college has been around longer. My Dad worked at a Ford plant for a year to save up money to go to college.

gap years aren't exchanges. It is just taking a year off to travel, work or do other things of interest.

I know plenty of people that refer to their exchange between HS and college as a gap year. I don't see why they should not be considered a gap year.

+1 Of course an exchange is a gap year. It's one of many options for a gap year.

Why on earth do you care about language? I used to say "took a year off" when I went on exchange (35 years ago) because there was no other vocab. If you take off with the intention of attending school soon thereafter, often with a deferred admission, it is a "gap" in your education between high school and college. Do you really care about vocab?