When i wanted something as a kid, i sometimes told my parents i was teased for not getting x,y,z, or i was feeling left out at school b/c everyone was talking about 90210 and i wasn't allowed to watch it. none of this was true but i totally suckered my parents into buying me stuff and letting me do stuff they otherwise would have thought better of.

Get her the clothes!!! Please.... do not tell her to suck it up. Get her the clothes. I went through this as a kid and it is not something that I easily recovered from. Please get her the clothes.

Anonymous wrote:Does the OP shop at one of those stores for the poors?

Uhh what exactly is "The Poors"???

It also depends where you live and your social circles. Where we are, I have not heard of any pressure, or else my 15 yo DD ignored it. But, her friends are not the ones to tease.

Anonymous wrote:There is a middle ground- buy her some name brand things within your budget and to the degree you think appropriate.
I'm not a fan of spending $100 on lululemon leggings, but I supplement DD's babysitting earnings to help her get a pair or two. These things make a difference between struggling socially and doing well for some kids.

I agree with this.

Growing up, we didn't have a ton of money but my parents would buy me something name brand for a birthday or Christmas and maybe one or two things for back to school. They wouldn't buy me really trendy things. A nicer jacket, jeans that were a good brand and a plainer style, or a pullover or a few shirts. Sometimes we would go outlet shopping for name brand bargains too, which is a good option.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have your DD tell the main who is doing the bullying "I can't wear that brand - it's a fat girl brand. But it's a great look on you!" Said with a huge grin and sweet as pie voice. That will shut her up quick.....

Why would you tell your child to say something like this?

Were you born rotten, pp, or did you acquire this character deficiency later in life?

Because she is a middle school child that's why.
And being in middle school is not all niceties and politeness like the adult world.
So sometimes it's better for a middle school child to fight back on a middle school level.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a 10 year old girl in an upper NW public elementary and there is ZERO focus on name brands in her school. She's one of the "it" girls and she wears Old Navy, Gap, and Target. (how she ended up as super charismatic/popular/cool is fascinating to me..as a former childhood geek.. but that is another post).

Enjoy it while it last. Save your pennies up for name brand Junior high clothes or the 'it' girl will be the 'was it' girl.

interesting. OP's daughter is 11. Will this change by next year?

Anonymous wrote:I have a 10 year old girl in an upper NW public elementary and there is ZERO focus on name brands in her school. She's one of the "it" girls and she wears Old Navy, Gap, and Target. (how she ended up as super charismatic/popular/cool is fascinating to me..as a former childhood geek.. but that is another post).

Enjoy it while it last. Save your pennies up for name brand Junior high clothes or the 'it' girl will be the 'was it' girl.

Does the OP shop at one of those stores for the poors?

If you are surrounded by upper SES then yes, not having the very expensive brand name stuff is going to be a huge deal. But, if you live in a SES diverse area, $110 pants is ridiculous for an 11 yr old. Can't you get someting a bit more reasonable but fashionable?

Thank goodness we live in a SES diverse area. I see 11 yr olds wearing clothes from Target, my DD/DS included.

Anonymous wrote:I have a 10 year old girl in an upper NW public elementary and there is ZERO focus on name brands in her school. She's one of the "it" girls and she wears Old Navy, Gap, and Target. (how she ended up as super charismatic/popular/cool is fascinating to me..as a former childhood geek.. but that is another post).

Um, she's 10. Middle school is a whole new ball of wax.

Anonymous wrote:Have your DD tell the main who is doing the bullying "I can't wear that brand - it's a fat girl brand. But it's a great look on you!" Said with a huge grin and sweet as pie voice. That will shut her up quick.....

Why would you tell your child to say something like this?

Were you born rotten, pp, or did you acquire this character deficiency later in life?

I have a 10 year old girl in an upper NW public elementary and there is ZERO focus on name brands in her school. She's one of the "it" girls and she wears Old Navy, Gap, and Target. (how she ended up as super charismatic/popular/cool is fascinating to me..as a former childhood geek.. but that is another post).

Unfortunately in this area the kids are going to be wearing the expensive stuff and your kid is going to need a few things just to fit in. It will do amazing things for self confidence to fit in.

Ebay is also another place to get some bargains on name brand stuff.