OP here. I cannot thank everyone who has taken the time to respond enough. From kind words not making me feel alone, to information about some online support groups and in person support groups, I have been able to take some steps to be more connected. I am rethinking our treatment team and asking about new medications. The time you took to respond has made a positive mark on my heart. Thank you!!

if you are in DC, ChAMPS is free and will come to your house. They can't put hands on a kid in crisis but will talk with them, tell you about other services, and call 911 and go to the hospital with you.

I wouldn't say it helped us with long-term stability, but having someone there was a good break for me--I found them soothing, if young and somewhat naive. They talk nicely to DS. And I think they were helpful in actually getting DS admitted to the hospital instead of sent home from the ER.

Anonymous wrote:I have an almost 12 year old son with bipolar and when his meds are good, he is such a sweet boy with a heart of gold. When the meds are off it is terrifying. As a consequence of genetics and abilify, he weighs over 160 pounds and is 5 foot 5. He can do real damage. When raging he has broken windows and doors. He has a hard time every spring and just blew up and punched me. His little brother is (justifiably) terrified as the older one ramps up and escapes to a neighbors for safety. He was hospitalized in the Fall and it was the most horrible experience for everyone. Just don't know how I'm going to keep riding this out. Sorry. Just needed to vent.

I am so sorry OP. That must be so hard for all of you.


My brother has multiple developmental disabilities but high functioning and was 6'2 by the age of 15. My mother told me the best advice she ever received was "Take a break before you need one." Which I understand its so hard to put yourself first but if you can keep ahead of your own self care it might help.

OP - Go to the National Association for Mental Ilness - NAMI or their web site and get info on a local chapter. It Is a support group for family members of persons with a mental illness.

OP, I am so sorry you are going through this. It can be very isolating but you are definitely not alone. My son has prolonged rages. Things were going pretty well for a year but he's been worsening over the last couple of months. Two weeks ago, it got so bad I had to call the police and he was hospitalized. I'm struggling to stay positive and hopeful.
Take care of yourself. I also try to maintain my son's privacy and am very selective in who I rely on. I have a couple of friends whose children also struggle with mental illness. It is so helpful to talk to them because they truly understand and they can also help me keep perspective that this is a chronic illness with ups and downs. Maybe be you can find a support group.
If you're not already, find someone your younger child can talk to. My younger child is so resilient so I thought he was fine. It's only after this last episode that he revealed he had nightmares that his brother is going to kill him. He hadn't told me because he thought I had enough to worry about.

Last poster here - no idea why that font is so small. Meant to say that there is no rationality or control. They are gone in a rage state.

Never allowed to be violent?!!!!! In my families experience when my brother was off his meds - he was so irrational that there was no method to get him NOT to be violent. It wasn't a matter of talking to him - he raged and destroyed things and hurt people. Not all cases can so easily be put as "not allowed"...you are very lucky that was your situation. It is truly frightening to see someone out of control..I can't tell you the number of times we had to call the police to manage the situation because nothing else would work without putting ourselves in grave danger.