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To answer OP and the pubic hair PP.

As a young teen, I basically grew all my body hair overnight. My parents wouldn't let me shave my legs/bikini area, so I swiped a razor from their bathroom. Ungodly mess. Please, please, PLEASE don't leave your kids to try to remove their own hair. They will totally do it.

That said, I wouldn't wax until midway through the teenage years. Give their skin a chance to mature more. Eyebrows and face are easy -- threading -- bikini line is a little dicier. I don't know what's best. Maybe a depilatory?

Would anyone mind if I hijacked the thread a little? It seems like most folks are responding in some vein of "if it bothers her it's time to do something" vein, but then again, most of the examples are of the more extreme variety. My very blond daughter, who has slightly darker blond eyebrows, that are full and beautiful, is bugging me to go to an eyebrow waxer because she wants them insanely thin (she showed me examples online). I'm telling you, there is objectively nothing at all odd about her eyebrows. (I wish I had them!) And also, it's not even like she's asking for a little "shaping." She's just got this warped sense of her beauty and what they look like and what she thinks she wants. I'm not inclined to take her and I certainly am not interested in wasting my money helping to make her look ugly. (Just FYI, if I am still losing this battle when she's 15/16, maybe I will tell her to go take her own money and do it and hope that she hates the results and never does it again. But at barely 12, I don't see why I have to do this for her.) For now, I've emphasized how painful she's going to think it is (she's got the world's lowest pain threshhold).

In case it matters to anyone, I let her shave her armpits. And I would let her shave her legs if she wanted to. (Her leg hair is very light and so no one can really see it and she hasn't brought it up.)

But what I really want to ask about is pubic hair. Despite how blond she is everywhere else, her public hair is black. It's also... well... surprisingly well-developed. She hates it and wants it ALL removed. It kind of happened out of the blue (puberty works fast!) and I'm guessing the quick change she sees in herself has something to do with why she hates it so much. But also... well... I wax completely and that is something she has been aware of for several years. So she wants to "look like me." She's expressed concerns about wearing a bathing suit. I have said that when summer comes and that concern is a reality, we can talk about her trimming the edges and how to keep up with that I've told her I don't feel comfortable with her removing it all. She says she doesn't like it and doesn't want any of it and why can't she do it if I do it? Admittedly, one of my first thoughts is "my wax pass is very expensive and I have no intention of paying for that for you for the next X years" but honestly, she'd probably just offer up her allowance and the truth is... that's not the real reason. I just feel like it's inappropriate. I feel like it's somehow connected to sexualizing her. But am I just being old-fashioned??? For me, I didn't think about shaving down there until I became sexually active in college. Clearly that's not why she wants it gone. She wants it off because she doesn't like it. But I also feel ... I don't know, like the right thing to do, at least for now, is to try to get her to love herself and the way she looks and not reject something as normal as public hair and that when she's more of an adult, she can have any version of it she wants? The whole thing is mind-boggling. I just didn't think she's turn 12 and want this stuff. PLEASE TELL ME SOMEONE ELSE IS STRUGGLING WITH THIS RIGHT NOW.

My daughters 11 and does dance, hair seems to be sprouting everywhere which she does not like so yes I take her to get waxed. I would rather she get it done profesionally than take a razor to certain body areas.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez if she has a mustache then now! I saw some little south Asian girls in sleeveless dresses the other day. The poor kids were so hairy. I can't imagine the kind of bullying they will have to go through.

I can't imagine living in a community where kids get bullied for this before they even hit puberty. Thank god for my small, amazing village.

It is the girls.

It is worse in small towns/private schools/small communities.

I am sure the tween & teen girls in your village are just as bad about this kind of thing as all the other tween & teen girls.

If you don't think this happens then you were obviously not a hairy girl.

I come from a small village. Town of less than 4k in farm country. I would go so far as to call it amazing overall. But still, kids started getting picked on for such things well before puberty.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Geez if she has a mustache then now! I saw some little south Asian girls in sleeveless dresses the other day. The poor kids were so hairy. I can't imagine the kind of bullying they will have to go through.

I can't imagine living in a community where kids get bullied for this before they even hit puberty. Thank god for my small, amazing village.

It is the girls.

It is worse in small towns/private schools/small communities.

I am sure the tween & teen girls in your village are just as bad about this kind of thing as all the other tween & teen girls.

If you don't think this happens then you were obviously not a hairy girl.

The first time she expresses discomfort with lip hair or a monobrow, help her to wax it.

Do not listen to posters who say wait util she is older.

Girls are horrible and being a tween/young teen with a visibke moustache or unibrow is just soul crushing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5Rs71RUc70

Sorry forgot to attach to previous post!

OP check out this video. Kind of long but skip to the end and see how the young girl has great eyebrows after waxing yet they are still full and natural looking. They do not look waxed. I second the PP who suggested threading for both the brows and upper lip. I love threading!

I also recommend threading. I'm Italian and DH is Indian, so our daughter is blessed with gorgeous, but hairy face! She's 15 now, but we probably started getting her eyebrows threaded around age 11 and upper lip a little later.

I started around the same age with bleaching for a few years, then waxing. I hadn't seen threading until I went to India for the first time 20 years ago. Now it's everywhere in the US - even the malls! Threading is great - those middle-eastern and south asian ladies know what they're doing when it comes to facial hair removal!

Good luck!

If it's bothering her, it's time.

Just reiterating what others have said -- if she doesn't care, don't push.

My very dark haired 14 y.o. has a moustache and hairy legs, neither of which she cares about. I have informed her that if and when she wants to address either one, I can help her out, but she has told me she's not interested right now and I haven't pushed. Since this isn't part of some overall refusal to groom or be presentable, I am not making an issue of it.

Anonymous wrote:Thread or wax, if she'll agree to it. For eyebrows maybe only do the center if there's a bit of a unibrow. Thin brows will look odd on her.

They can be shaped without making them thin.

Anonymous wrote:Don'y bleach, get it threaded. Bleach looks terrible, it's so obvious!

Yes, don't bleach. Then you just have a blonde mustache.