Anonymous wrote:What is "pleb tier"?

I think it means "lower tier" school.

You need to look in the mirror. What kind of parenting led to this? You sound like you are super-successful working with *no one* from a mediocre college? State school or community college, or make the kid pay himself and chances are he'll work harder.

Anonymous wrote:Without naming college names, the prospect of writing a $30,000 check for each of the next four or five years for a place that is pretty much open door for UMC students troubles me. Feels like parents are boxed in a corner even if our children haven't earned it. We're socially pressured to buy our underachieving kids the equivalent of a new sports car. Hey, nice work getting all those inflated B-pluses, here's a new Porsche 911 ($120,000), pal. There's no chance my son is equipped to handle a STEM, so whatever lightweight degree he ekes out from an already subpar university makes for pretty dim prospects, yes? What a crock.

Thanks for putting into words what many of us think. Bravo.

Anonymous wrote:Don't most state schools cost $25-30K per year?

UMD College Park is 25k/year (inclusive of COL). OP doesn't have to pay all of that. OP's child could earn 5k/year through part time and summer jobs, kick in another 8k/year in student loans. That leaves OP responsible for 12k/year. Or, kid can live at home.

Anonymous wrote:Well then OP, don't pay so much. Tell kid they are going to a state school or community college and those are the only options. That's what the parents of my lower achieving middle class friends did.

...state schools are quickly approaching 30k a year.

Don't most state schools cost $25-30K per year?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What a sad excuse for a Dad

Love my kids, just frustrated. I look around and don't work with anyone from these mediocre colleges. And the inability to pursue a STEM at a crappy school just exacerbates the already bleak outlook.

Well if you are bitching about spending 120k on your kids education, your prestigious college has let you down. Maybe if you went to a better college you would have had more success it life.

Well then OP, don't pay so much. Tell kid they are going to a state school or community college and those are the only options. That's what the parents of my lower achieving middle class friends did.

So how would you feel about paying $70K a year for a patrician tier college?

College names/examples pls? No idea what you are talking about.

Anonymous wrote:In what way are you motivating your kid to work hard for life's luxuries if you're accepting it as a reality that you have to buy him a $120K car that he doesn't deserve? Sorry pop, I think this situation is on you a little bit.

Go back and reread what OP wrote. It's not what you think.

I agree college costs are too high. So, here's the thing. Don't pay more than its worth. PPs are right about community college being a good intermediate option for lots of kids. Or at least tell them you'll pay for only a big state school rather than a "crappy" private school. You can get a really excellent education at many state schools. Or, I suppose, you could tell your kid they'll have to finance it themselves. I'd feel bad telling my kids that if they were hardworking, straight-A students, but not so bad if they've been eking by. I'm not sure where this social pressure you speak of comes from.

That said, I went to a middling liberal arts university and got a great education. I was intimidated by the large classes and general crush of the big state university I was admitted to, and didn't even apply to fancy Ivy Leagues or the like. I got a small merit scholarship that helped alleviate the burden on my folks, fortunately, but nowhere near the whole shebang. The relatively small, nurturing community was exactly what I needed at that point. Went on to get a law degree and graduate at the top of my fancy law school class and am doing just fine. So, I don't know if you would consider my undergrad education "crappy". It probably was overpriced, but it was also exactly what I needed.

Also, why the fixation on STEM? Plenty of good careers out there that aren't in STEM. What are your kids' strengths?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In what way are you motivating your kid to work hard for life's luxuries if you're accepting it as a reality that you have to buy him a $120K car that he doesn't deserve? Sorry pop, I think this situation is on you a little bit.

Can you seriously not read? He's saying that paying for his kid's crappy college feels like the equivalent of buying him an un-earned Porsche.

Kids with A's deserve a Porsche? Shouldn't they have earned merit scholarships or grants... do they really deserve a Porsche? Maybe if they worked harder they would not need $120k from their parents.

Anonymous wrote:In what way are you motivating your kid to work hard for life's luxuries if you're accepting it as a reality that you have to buy him a $120K car that he doesn't deserve? Sorry pop, I think this situation is on you a little bit.

Can you seriously not read? He's saying that paying for his kid's crappy college feels like the equivalent of buying him an un-earned Porsche.

In what way are you motivating your kid to work hard for life's luxuries if you're accepting it as a reality that you have to buy him a $120K car that he doesn't deserve? Sorry pop, I think this situation is on you a little bit.