Anonymous
07/22/2016 12:45
Subject: Not dropping off for a 7 year old's birthday party
Just say something along the line of "you can just drop off your daughter and go do an errand, do not have to stay," hopefully, she won't leave the sibling with you. You can repeat that when she shows up too.
Sometimes, parents just want to see what it's like before keeping their kid(s) there for more than an hour. If I've never even stepped my foot into the house before, I would very much be curious about what it's like inside-mainly to see if there are no obvious stuff that would endanger my child. I mean if the house is a BIG mess, and there are beer bottles and cigarettes around, nails, trash, and guns hanging on the wall, inappropriate photos on the wall, you think I would want my child there longer than necessary.
She could also want to get to know you better. I mean, if our kids are going to be friends, you need to know the parents. She could also want some company for herself and her child.
I don't like the idea of not knowing you and dropping my child off at your place. I might have spoken to you a while but the inside of a home can tell some things about you.
Sometimes, parents just want to see what it's like before keeping their kid(s) there for more than an hour. If I've never even stepped my foot into the house before, I would very much be curious about what it's like inside-mainly to see if there are no obvious stuff that would endanger my child. I mean if the house is a BIG mess, and there are beer bottles and cigarettes around, nails, trash, and guns hanging on the wall, inappropriate photos on the wall, you think I would want my child there longer than necessary.
She could also want to get to know you better. I mean, if our kids are going to be friends, you need to know the parents. She could also want some company for herself and her child.
I don't like the idea of not knowing you and dropping my child off at your place. I might have spoken to you a while but the inside of a home can tell some things about you.
Anonymous
07/21/2016 09:47
Subject: Not dropping off for a 7 year old's birthday party
Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't write "enjoy your night off ... etc"
as its not addressing the issue directly and its rude, frankly.
but you're right the mom doesn't need to be there and the toddler definitely doesn't.
you might be better placed to say "apologies for the confusion, we aren't having siblings this time as its a very small group, you're welcome to pop in for a drink with me in the next room if want to..."
I see two sides on this - probably depends on the personalities and relationships involved. "Enjoy your night off" could be passive aggressive "You're not welcome to stay" and I assume that's what you mean. I could also see it giving the guest's mom a polite exit from an awkward situation. Depending on delivery tone, it could also be quite rude to tell someone flat out "You've made a wrong assumption; you're not welcome to stay." The gentle suggestion to "enjoy the night off" could be just that.
Not trying to change anyone's mind, and I see that OP has already resolved this, but want to point out how important tone can be in delivery.
Anonymous
07/20/2016 14:34
Subject: Not dropping off for a 7 year old's birthday party
It's embarrassing how many people just blindly reply without reading. The OP replied awhile ago - the issue was quickly resolved! No need to keep replying!