Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I can certainly see why you, as his girlfriend, would be intimidated by this. However, he's been friends with her for years and you've only been in his life for a few months. I would be pretty pissed if a new boyfriend started telling me that I shouldn't be friends with my close male friends because he was concerned that our texting about work BS and Game of Thrones was a threat to our relationship.
If I wanted to text my husband about these things, I would (and do!). Doesn't change that I'm also going to talk to other people in my life that I'm close to.
I think you need to figure out what exactly bothers you so much. That he chooses to talk to her instead of you? Do you want to talk to him for 3 hours while he's driving to see you? Do you want to text him incessantly?
I know this is my own insecurities. She is educated, I am not, she is single living extremely well(saw pictures of her home), I am back living with parents with son from previous relationship, she is well traveled, I haven't been off the east coast. I ask myself why has he picked me over her and if she isn't interested now but changes her mind and snaps her fingers does he just disappear out of my life. I feel like a second fiddle, like he settled for me cause he couldn't have her.
Anonymous wrote:The fact that the texts haven't crossed into inappropriate territory is what makes each think that what they're doing is all fine and innocent. Just friends. Despite the frequency and the timing (all day until "good night") and they also get to see each at the office.
Op- they're both hooked on each other.
Anonymous wrote:What is your long-term plan with the boyfriend? Do you both talk about the future, or is it just casual? Long-distance relationships are hard enough when there is a plan to live closer together.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Super hot? And what about your boyfriend. Good looking?
OP - the sheer volume of texting for the past year has created an intimacy between them that both enjoy. A lot. Even if talk never went beyond pop culture or whatever show they like, they have already developed a bond and I bet the sexual tension is thick between them.
He works out daily, incredible body. Great face and jawline. Big sigh....so this maybe one of those things where opportunity just hasn't been there. One office party with booze, one lunch with drinks and game on. I really need to think about this. He has chosen to be with me. He comes a great distance to be with me but he has his day to days with her. Best of both worlds
Have you just straight up asked him? Or are you just snooping through his text messages and feeling insecure? It sounds like there is plenty of opportunity for him to have a romantic relationship with this woman, but he still chooses to be with you.
Nope have just casually asked him about her. His response doesn't reflect the level of intimacy that I detect from the text. I haven't asked probing questions cause I don't want to come off as jealous(though I am).
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Super hot? And what about your boyfriend. Good looking?
OP - the sheer volume of texting for the past year has created an intimacy between them that both enjoy. A lot. Even if talk never went beyond pop culture or whatever show they like, they have already developed a bond and I bet the sexual tension is thick between them.
He works out daily, incredible body. Great face and jawline. Big sigh....so this maybe one of those things where opportunity just hasn't been there. One office party with booze, one lunch with drinks and game on. I really need to think about this. He has chosen to be with me. He comes a great distance to be with me but he has his day to days with her. Best of both worlds
OP...what do you do for a living? Any way you can get more local and then maybe he can let her go?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Super hot? And what about your boyfriend. Good looking?
OP - the sheer volume of texting for the past year has created an intimacy between them that both enjoy. A lot. Even if talk never went beyond pop culture or whatever show they like, they have already developed a bond and I bet the sexual tension is thick between them.
He works out daily, incredible body. Great face and jawline. Big sigh....so this maybe one of those things where opportunity just hasn't been there. One office party with booze, one lunch with drinks and game on. I really need to think about this. He has chosen to be with me. He comes a great distance to be with me but he has his day to days with her. Best of both worlds
Have you just straight up asked him? Or are you just snooping through his text messages and feeling insecure? It sounds like there is plenty of opportunity for him to have a romantic relationship with this woman, but he still chooses to be with you.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Super hot? And what about your boyfriend. Good looking?
OP - the sheer volume of texting for the past year has created an intimacy between them that both enjoy. A lot. Even if talk never went beyond pop culture or whatever show they like, they have already developed a bond and I bet the sexual tension is thick between them.
He works out daily, incredible body. Great face and jawline. Big sigh....so this maybe one of those things where opportunity just hasn't been there. One office party with booze, one lunch with drinks and game on. I really need to think about this. He has chosen to be with me. He comes a great distance to be with me but he has his day to days with her. Best of both worlds
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Super hot? And what about your boyfriend. Good looking?
OP - the sheer volume of texting for the past year has created an intimacy between them that both enjoy. A lot. Even if talk never went beyond pop culture or whatever show they like, they have already developed a bond and I bet the sexual tension is thick between them.
He works out daily, incredible body. Great face and jawline. Big sigh....so this maybe one of those things where opportunity just hasn't been there. One office party with booze, one lunch with drinks and game on. I really need to think about this. He has chosen to be with me. He comes a great distance to be with me but he has his day to days with her. Best of both worlds
Anonymous wrote:Super hot? And what about your boyfriend. Good looking?
OP - the sheer volume of texting for the past year has created an intimacy between them that both enjoy. A lot. Even if talk never went beyond pop culture or whatever show they like, they have already developed a bond and I bet the sexual tension is thick between them.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I can certainly see why you, as his girlfriend, would be intimidated by this. However, he's been friends with her for years and you've only been in his life for a few months. I would be pretty pissed if a new boyfriend started telling me that I shouldn't be friends with my close male friends because he was concerned that our texting about work BS and Game of Thrones was a threat to our relationship.
If I wanted to text my husband about these things, I would (and do!). Doesn't change that I'm also going to talk to other people in my life that I'm close to.
I think you need to figure out what exactly bothers you so much. That he chooses to talk to her instead of you? Do you want to talk to him for 3 hours while he's driving to see you? Do you want to text him incessantly?
I know this is my own insecurities. She is educated, I am not, she is single living extremely well(saw pictures of her home), I am back living with parents with son from previous relationship, she is well traveled, I haven't been off the east coast. I ask myself why has he picked me over her and if she isn't interested now but changes her mind and snaps her fingers does he just disappear out of my life. I feel like a second fiddle, like he settled for me cause he couldn't have her.
Well, think about it this way. She's a lot older than him and also is his superior at work. My husband has a pretty strong relationship with a woman who used to be his boss, but she's 15 years older than him and he definitely sees her on the same level as his aunt. He likes her, they talk regularly about mutual interests, and she has definitely played a really important role in his life, but he doesn't see her romantically.
Do you have anything other than a lot of communications to indicate that your boyfriend sees this woman romantically?
BTW...not his boss, just same company and in higher position than him. Not a mentor.
Well the only thing that does bother me is when I asked him what she looked like....first he hesitated then went on to say basically that she is super hot. This isn't a motherly, aunty, or sisterlyl type of relationship. I have seen a bad fuzzy picture of her, all I saw was a long slender leg and a lot of hair.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I can certainly see why you, as his girlfriend, would be intimidated by this. However, he's been friends with her for years and you've only been in his life for a few months. I would be pretty pissed if a new boyfriend started telling me that I shouldn't be friends with my close male friends because he was concerned that our texting about work BS and Game of Thrones was a threat to our relationship.
If I wanted to text my husband about these things, I would (and do!). Doesn't change that I'm also going to talk to other people in my life that I'm close to.
I think you need to figure out what exactly bothers you so much. That he chooses to talk to her instead of you? Do you want to talk to him for 3 hours while he's driving to see you? Do you want to text him incessantly?
I know this is my own insecurities. She is educated, I am not, she is single living extremely well(saw pictures of her home), I am back living with parents with son from previous relationship, she is well traveled, I haven't been off the east coast. I ask myself why has he picked me over her and if she isn't interested now but changes her mind and snaps her fingers does he just disappear out of my life. I feel like a second fiddle, like he settled for me cause he couldn't have her.
Well, think about it this way. She's a lot older than him and also is his superior at work. My husband has a pretty strong relationship with a woman who used to be his boss, but she's 15 years older than him and he definitely sees her on the same level as his aunt. He likes her, they talk regularly about mutual interests, and she has definitely played a really important role in his life, but he doesn't see her romantically.
Do you have anything other than a lot of communications to indicate that your boyfriend sees this woman romantically?
BTW...not his boss, just same company and in higher position than him. Not a mentor.
Well the only thing that does bother me is when I asked him what she looked like....first he hesitated then went on to say basically that she is super hot. This isn't a motherly, aunty, or sisterlyl type of relationship. I have seen a bad fuzzy picture of her, all I saw was a long slender leg and a lot of hair.