Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What makes you unattracted to your spouse?
-Physically, his weight. He is 46 and very heavy. His pants size is 40 (waist). Also, he is just not that nice to me. I do not care to go on any form of birth control, and he does not wish to use condoms or get a vasectomy. We have 4 children already, and every time I've been pregnant, he's been especially mean to me. I'm not going through that again.

Are you still attracted to and turned on by other men (cute doctor, guy at the gym etc) or is that part of your brain just switched off entirely?
-I am still VERY attracted to other men.

What would you say is the main reason (relationship or otherwise) that you and your spouse are not sexually active?
-I have no desire. It was never "good" sex anyway. Why would I bother? It's a lose/lose situation for me---bad sex, possibility of getting pregnant...absolutely no good can come of it.

Do you still take care of your own needs? (Masturbation)
-nope. It's been YEARS since my husband and I have had sex. In the last year, I have started an affair. That takes care of my needs quite nicely. Before the affair, I just did without.

Thats a tough predicament. How often do you meet with your affair? Is the sex better?

I see my affair partner a few times a week but we don't always have sex---we go out to lunch, go for hikes, etc. Like a real "dating" relationship. We are in love. And the sex is AMAZING.

What makes it amazing? Is it just having a better connection?

He probably has several sex partners and sleeps with them before or after meeting up with you on your non "action' nights. Gross.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What makes you unattracted to your spouse?
-Physically, his weight. He is 46 and very heavy. His pants size is 40 (waist). Also, he is just not that nice to me. I do not care to go on any form of birth control, and he does not wish to use condoms or get a vasectomy. We have 4 children already, and every time I've been pregnant, he's been especially mean to me. I'm not going through that again.

Are you still attracted to and turned on by other men (cute doctor, guy at the gym etc) or is that part of your brain just switched off entirely?
-I am still VERY attracted to other men.

What would you say is the main reason (relationship or otherwise) that you and your spouse are not sexually active?
-I have no desire. It was never "good" sex anyway. Why would I bother? It's a lose/lose situation for me---bad sex, possibility of getting pregnant...absolutely no good can come of it.

Do you still take care of your own needs? (Masturbation)
-nope. It's been YEARS since my husband and I have had sex. In the last year, I have started an affair. That takes care of my needs quite nicely. Before the affair, I just did without.

Thats a tough predicament. How often do you meet with your affair? Is the sex better?

I see my affair partner a few times a week but we don't always have sex---we go out to lunch, go for hikes, etc. Like a real "dating" relationship. We are in love. And the sex is AMAZING.

What makes it amazing? Is it just having a better connection?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What makes you unattracted to your spouse?
-Physically, his weight. He is 46 and very heavy. His pants size is 40 (waist). Also, he is just not that nice to me. I do not care to go on any form of birth control, and he does not wish to use condoms or get a vasectomy. We have 4 children already, and every time I've been pregnant, he's been especially mean to me. I'm not going through that again.

Are you still attracted to and turned on by other men (cute doctor, guy at the gym etc) or is that part of your brain just switched off entirely?
-I am still VERY attracted to other men.

What would you say is the main reason (relationship or otherwise) that you and your spouse are not sexually active?
-I have no desire. It was never "good" sex anyway. Why would I bother? It's a lose/lose situation for me---bad sex, possibility of getting pregnant...absolutely no good can come of it.

Do you still take care of your own needs? (Masturbation)
-nope. It's been YEARS since my husband and I have had sex. In the last year, I have started an affair. That takes care of my needs quite nicely. Before the affair, I just did without.

Hot but how do you find the time with four kids?

Kids are older/self sufficient

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What makes you unattracted to your spouse?
-Physically, his weight. He is 46 and very heavy. His pants size is 40 (waist). Also, he is just not that nice to me. I do not care to go on any form of birth control, and he does not wish to use condoms or get a vasectomy. We have 4 children already, and every time I've been pregnant, he's been especially mean to me. I'm not going through that again.

Are you still attracted to and turned on by other men (cute doctor, guy at the gym etc) or is that part of your brain just switched off entirely?
-I am still VERY attracted to other men.

What would you say is the main reason (relationship or otherwise) that you and your spouse are not sexually active?
-I have no desire. It was never "good" sex anyway. Why would I bother? It's a lose/lose situation for me---bad sex, possibility of getting pregnant...absolutely no good can come of it.

Do you still take care of your own needs? (Masturbation)
-nope. It's been YEARS since my husband and I have had sex. In the last year, I have started an affair. That takes care of my needs quite nicely. Before the affair, I just did without.

Thats a tough predicament. How often do you meet with your affair? Is the sex better?

I see my affair partner a few times a week but we don't always have sex---we go out to lunch, go for hikes, etc. Like a real "dating" relationship. We are in love. And the sex is AMAZING.

Anonymous wrote:What makes you unattracted to your spouse?
-Physically, his weight. He is 46 and very heavy. His pants size is 40 (waist). Also, he is just not that nice to me. I do not care to go on any form of birth control, and he does not wish to use condoms or get a vasectomy. We have 4 children already, and every time I've been pregnant, he's been especially mean to me. I'm not going through that again.

Are you still attracted to and turned on by other men (cute doctor, guy at the gym etc) or is that part of your brain just switched off entirely?
-I am still VERY attracted to other men.

What would you say is the main reason (relationship or otherwise) that you and your spouse are not sexually active?
-I have no desire. It was never "good" sex anyway. Why would I bother? It's a lose/lose situation for me---bad sex, possibility of getting pregnant...absolutely no good can come of it.

Do you still take care of your own needs? (Masturbation)
-nope. It's been YEARS since my husband and I have had sex. In the last year, I have started an affair. That takes care of my needs quite nicely. Before the affair, I just did without.

Hot but how do you find the time with four kids?

Anonymous wrote:What makes you unattracted to your spouse?
-Physically, his weight. He is 46 and very heavy. His pants size is 40 (waist). Also, he is just not that nice to me. I do not care to go on any form of birth control, and he does not wish to use condoms or get a vasectomy. We have 4 children already, and every time I've been pregnant, he's been especially mean to me. I'm not going through that again.

Are you still attracted to and turned on by other men (cute doctor, guy at the gym etc) or is that part of your brain just switched off entirely?
-I am still VERY attracted to other men.

What would you say is the main reason (relationship or otherwise) that you and your spouse are not sexually active?
-I have no desire. It was never "good" sex anyway. Why would I bother? It's a lose/lose situation for me---bad sex, possibility of getting pregnant...absolutely no good can come of it.

Do you still take care of your own needs? (Masturbation)
-nope. It's been YEARS since my husband and I have had sex. In the last year, I have started an affair. That takes care of my needs quite nicely. Before the affair, I just did without.

Thats a tough predicament. How often do you meet with your affair? Is the sex better?

What makes you unattracted to your spouse?
-Physically, his weight. He is 46 and very heavy. His pants size is 40 (waist). Also, he is just not that nice to me. I do not care to go on any form of birth control, and he does not wish to use condoms or get a vasectomy. We have 4 children already, and every time I've been pregnant, he's been especially mean to me. I'm not going through that again.

Are you still attracted to and turned on by other men (cute doctor, guy at the gym etc) or is that part of your brain just switched off entirely?
-I am still VERY attracted to other men.

What would you say is the main reason (relationship or otherwise) that you and your spouse are not sexually active?
-I have no desire. It was never "good" sex anyway. Why would I bother? It's a lose/lose situation for me---bad sex, possibility of getting pregnant...absolutely no good can come of it.

Do you still take care of your own needs? (Masturbation)
-nope. It's been YEARS since my husband and I have had sex. In the last year, I have started an affair. That takes care of my needs quite nicely. Before the affair, I just did without.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I don't have more sex with my husband is because he doesn't want more.

Why didn't I marry someone like you?

I'd like it 3 or 4 times a week as a baseline, more if time and creativity permit. Ah well, in my next life.

How do you avoid chafing with that frequency?

If you don't have sufficient lubrication to avoid chafing, you need to supplement. But that would also explain a lot about why you don't have regular sex.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I don't have more sex with my husband is because he doesn't want more.

Why didn't I marry someone like you?

I'd like it 3 or 4 times a week as a baseline, more if time and creativity permit. Ah well, in my next life.

How do you avoid chafing with that frequency?

Chafing? I'm female. There's no chafing (?)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I don't have more sex with my husband is because he doesn't want more.

Why didn't I marry someone like you?

I'd like it 3 or 4 times a week as a baseline, more if time and creativity permit. Ah well, in my next life.

How do you avoid chafing with that frequency?

if you're chafing, you're doing it all wrong

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I don't have more sex with my husband is because he doesn't want more.

Why didn't I marry someone like you?

I'd like it 3 or 4 times a week as a baseline, more if time and creativity permit. Ah well, in my next life.

How do you avoid chafing with that frequency?

There's no chafing as long as you're really excited!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I don't have more sex with my husband is because he doesn't want more.

Why didn't I marry someone like you?

I'd like it 3 or 4 times a week as a baseline, more if time and creativity permit. Ah well, in my next life.

How do you avoid chafing with that frequency?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only reason I don't have more sex with my husband is because he doesn't want more.

Why didn't I marry someone like you?

I'd like it 3 or 4 times a week as a baseline, more if time and creativity permit. Ah well, in my next life.

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious about the points below:

What makes you unattracted to your spouse?

Are you still attracted to and turned on by other men (cute doctor, guy at the gym etc) or is that part of your brain just switched off entirely?

What would you say is the main reason (relationship or otherwise) that you and your spouse are not sexually active?

Do you still take care of your own needs? (Masturbation)

I was not attracted to my ex-husband for a variety of reasons. He was attractive, but often the way he treated me made me feel very insecure. He was critical about my weight and appearance - in what he believed was a helpful way - pre- and post-baby. When we got together, I was 5'7" and 140 pounds; when we married, same height, 145 pounds; gained 30 pounds with the baby and struggled to lose the last 10). It made me very insecure about being naked around him, and it was difficult to feel aroused when I was worried that he was judging/repulsed/whatever. I wouldn't say that I was attracted to other men during this time. I certainly noticed attractive men, but not in a fantasy sort of way. I didn't think about having sex with other people. I didn't think about having sex at all. Didn't masturbate either.

I will say that having a child was a hell of a dodge for me. It gave me something else to think about than the sorry state of my relationship with someone who I was supposed to be in love with. If I worried about the state of my marriage, it was easy to say, well, we have a baby together, and that's a hard time in life. Later, when we divorced, he told me that he just thought that things would get better. I guess he maybe missed the times when we had serious conversations about how the way he was acting was affecting me.

I would say that his anal abscess pretty much killed the magic. He claims that half of all men get them so that explains a lot.