Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I remember listening to Dr. Laura in the car with my mother as a child. A woman called in asking about a baby shower. The pregnant woman was unmarried, the shower was at their church, and she felt uncomfortable with the situation but didn't want to be rude and not send a gift. Dr Laura advised her to NOT send a gift, go to the shower, or engage with her at all--to send a message that "that kind of behavior" (being a single mother) is unacceptable.
I asked my mom why she was being so mean. My mother never listened to her after that. This was in the mid 90s. I can't believe she's still on the air!
Actually, I completely agree with her advice on this. It has nothing to do with being "mean."
I remember that call, or maybe a very similar one. The caller's daughter was a teenager who had been invited to a shower. The party was being thrown for a pregnant teenager and most of the guests were other teenage girls. The concern was that the other girls were getting the message that teen pregnancy was the occasion for a party and gifts, rather than the beginning of a lot of responsibility and possible difficult times for an unmarried teen who hadn't yet graduated from high school, let alone college.
I'm not sure about this next part, but I seem to recall that she suggested quietly sending a gift of infant clothes or diapers or some needed baby supply that the caller could afford to help out the young woman. She did suggest not allowing the daughter to go to the actual party because she didn't think that a teen being pregnant was a reason to celebrate. Essentially, support the young mother and her baby, but don't act like getting pregnant in high school is a super fun idea and a good way to get started on adult life.