Anonymous wrote:
and sometimes i feel awkward.
i grew up in the area so went to a big 3 here.
my kids are in public and i feel that whenever i mention where i went to school, i get an automatic, "why aren't you sending your kids there?"

the school in question has gone up in cost 3 fold since i went there and while we are well off, we can't afford 2 of these tuitions... and i'm actually perfectly happy at our public school. But the school i went to is so well-known and well-thought of that i think people think i'm a terrible person for not automatically putting my kids there...

anyone else in the same boat?

Where I went to high school has never come up since I graduated from college. How does this get brought up?

Went to a SFS reunion recently. Many more kids in public than in private; very few at SFS (although there was a fair bit of "maybe for HS" sentiment wafting about). It's a money issue for some, but not most.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, it's odd that where you went to school comes up in conversation. I mean consider all the people who are from elsewhere else, they never discuss their high school. Unless you're currently running w/your high school crowd, you need to drop it. Your decisions for the here-and-now, for your children, are sound. Stop trying to complicate your experience.

+1 No one has asked where I went to HS since college. OP, how old are you? How is this coming up in conversation?

NP, it comes up all the time for me. Generally when people are discussing where they're from - if someone else is local they often tell/ask what HS. Though in the same boat as OP I never feel any flack - maybe b/c I grew up EOTP and now live in good cluster in MoCo?

I think you're reading too much into small talk. I went to a MoCo public school & kids now in DCPS & I get the same question all the time. I'm not sure people are judging so much as curious as they are trying to figure out what to do with their own kids, or really just making parent-style small talk. In addition, if you are at the public and other public parents are asking you, the odds of them trying to get reassurance that even someone who went to a Big 3 isn't sending their kids there is actually affirming more than its a judgement.

Interesting thread. I attended a well known boarding school in the northeast in the 90s. It rarely comes up but when it does, people tend to be surprised and impressed. I'm ambivalent about it. Lots of cons and a few pros to the boarding experience imo. Won't be doing it with my kids.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, it's odd that where you went to school comes up in conversation. I mean consider all the people who are from elsewhere else, they never discuss their high school. Unless you're currently running w/your high school crowd, you need to drop it. Your decisions for the here-and-now, for your children, are sound. Stop trying to complicate your experience.

+1 No one has asked where I went to HS since college. OP, how old are you? How is this coming up in conversation?

If you're living in the area where you grew up its common. It's one of the first things I ask - not snobbishly but to see who we know in common! "Oh you're from Bethesda originally? Where did you go to high school?"

I also went to SFS (as we old schoolers call it) and am sending kids to MCPS.

Anonymous wrote:I'm in the exact same boat as you OP. And while I can't speak for OP about this, because people know I grew up here it's not uncommon for them to ask where I went to school.

So why do any of you care if you went to a super elite $$$ place and "have" to tell others that for whatever reason (none of their business but somehow you have a need to explain) that your kids are going to public/parochial school whatever.. are we still in High school that you care what people think? If so- move on. For your whole family's sake.

I'm in the exact same boat as you OP. And while I can't speak for OP about this, because people know I grew up here it's not uncommon for them to ask where I went to school.

Anonymous wrote:I went to an exclusive boarding school that cost $17k when I went. Now it costs $65k. All the alums I know understand why I won't send my kids there, and if uninformed people ask me why I will explain it to them.

That's what happenned to my college. I can't imagine sending my kids there, with the current costs. They've way outpaced inflation.

DH went to private catholic school all the way through - I went public. He wants our kids to go to catholic school as well. It's fine now in elementary, but the costs for high school are crazy and would take every penny we have. There'd be nothing left for college. I just can't see doing it that way.

Why do you tell people where you went?

Sidwell grad here. Our kids go public in DC, and at this point really thinking staying public all the way. It is the price tag -- was 10k when I graduated, now 40k? Well ahead of inflation -- and also the kids really like their school now. Makes me a little sad, but only a little.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, it's odd that where you went to school comes up in conversation. I mean consider all the people who are from elsewhere else, they never discuss their high school. Unless you're currently running w/your high school crowd, you need to drop it. Your decisions for the here-and-now, for your children, are sound. Stop trying to complicate your experience.

+1 No one has asked where I went to HS since college. OP, how old are you? How is this coming up in conversation?

Op here. I'm 40 and live in this area and grew up here. I have small kids in school and where I went to school comes up ALL the time bc people know I grew up here. I'm sure if I was from elsewhere, no one would ask. In addition, saying I'm from school X has made inroads with people at work. I'm in a field that might be parallel to the law firms (smallish enough that you know people by name, big enough that people are at all different forms) where you went to school carries weight when speaking with someone who is either 1) also local and went to a similar school or 2)is sending their kids to a private in the area. Which is a lot of people in my big-law-ish field. People love to talk about schools.

If you can't afford it, end of story, regardless of where you went to high school. Why apologize?

Anonymous wrote:Op, it's odd that where you went to school comes up in conversation. I mean consider all the people who are from elsewhere else, they never discuss their high school. Unless you're currently running w/your high school crowd, you need to drop it. Your decisions for the here-and-now, for your children, are sound. Stop trying to complicate your experience.

+1 No one has asked where I went to HS since college. OP, how old are you? How is this coming up in conversation?

I went to SFS and some of my kids went public, others to boarding schools, thanks to generous financial aid. I would hate to be in a work situation where my co-workers interrogated me about private school choices. It does seem that the decision is actually tougher for families with more income, not so much in terms of affordability but in terms of value for money.