Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP,

Is this a new school for him or a new classroom? It may not be the right fit for him. My kid started acting out and with a different school, absolutely no problems. Is he getting picked on? Are possible delays causing him to act out? Are there new stressors at home?

At 4, I don't think a psychologist would be helpful unless it's play therapy. I do agree with other people about scheduling a global evaluation with a developmental pediatrician. (And definitely no to the paint brush. Jesus definitely wouldn't do this, let alone anyone in their right mind.)

It's a new school - we moved him because we didn't think the old school had fully prepared his sister for K. I started working from home (after a few years of being a stay at home mom), and I do worry that my stress has affected him. I've let one of my two projects go in an effort to reduce that stress. We noticed the physical delay in a class, and I do also wonder if his body not doing what he wants/not feeling good when he tries to do certain things isn't a big part of this too. I don't think he's being picked on but that was absolutely the cause when his sister had a rough patch in preschool, though it was different than this.

Anonymous wrote:OP,

Is this a new school for him or a new classroom? It may not be the right fit for him. My kid started acting out and with a different school, absolutely no problems. Is he getting picked on? Are possible delays causing him to act out? Are there new stressors at home?

At 4, I don't think a psychologist would be helpful unless it's play therapy. I do agree with other people about scheduling a global evaluation with a developmental pediatrician. (And definitely no to the paint brush. Jesus definitely wouldn't do this, let alone anyone in their right mind.)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many kids are in the classroom and how much structure is there?

My child had aggressive behavior in pre k. She wanted to engage with the other kids but didn't know how. Plus, the school, by design, was uunstructured and let kids take the lead on activities and interactions. This stressed her out, but she didn't have the emotional vocabulary to tell us. When we got her in a more structured supportive school, the aggression completely disappeared.

For a psychologist, I recommend Paula Elitov. She will observe at school and make recommendations. For us, we also had her evaluate and make a provisional diagnosis, which worked well until we got a neuropsych a few years later.

PP with a similar boy ... we think the same exact issue is happening with us! Wants to play, doesn't know how, and too much unstructured time in school (plus a really high teacher-student ratio). I really wish we could find a more structured and supportive school, but it seems like in this area that the ratios get pushed up as high as they can go as soon as licensing permits them to.

How did you determine that the new school offered better structures and support?

Uh - this is us, exactly, and I just posted and the overwhelming consensus was that we likely would not get into Maddux. I'm so hoping we do.

We went to Maddux, which is designed to be structured and socially supportive. I know, not a solution for everyone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many kids are in the classroom and how much structure is there?

My child had aggressive behavior in pre k. She wanted to engage with the other kids but didn't know how. Plus, the school, by design, was uunstructured and let kids take the lead on activities and interactions. This stressed her out, but she didn't have the emotional vocabulary to tell us. When we got her in a more structured supportive school, the aggression completely disappeared.

For a psychologist, I recommend Paula Elitov. She will observe at school and make recommendations. For us, we also had her evaluate and make a provisional diagnosis, which worked well until we got a neuropsych a few years later.

FTR, Paula Elitov does do neuropsych testing and is the only person I found who is willing to break the testing up into multiple sessions.

Anonymous wrote:How many kids are in the classroom and how much structure is there?

My child had aggressive behavior in pre k. She wanted to engage with the other kids but didn't know how. Plus, the school, by design, was uunstructured and let kids take the lead on activities and interactions. This stressed her out, but she didn't have the emotional vocabulary to tell us. When we got her in a more structured supportive school, the aggression completely disappeared.

For a psychologist, I recommend Paula Elitov. She will observe at school and make recommendations. For us, we also had her evaluate and make a provisional diagnosis, which worked well until we got a neuropsych a few years later.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many kids are in the classroom and how much structure is there?

My child had aggressive behavior in pre k. She wanted to engage with the other kids but didn't know how. Plus, the school, by design, was uunstructured and let kids take the lead on activities and interactions. This stressed her out, but she didn't have the emotional vocabulary to tell us. When we got her in a more structured supportive school, the aggression completely disappeared.

For a psychologist, I recommend Paula Elitov. She will observe at school and make recommendations. For us, we also had her evaluate and make a provisional diagnosis, which worked well until we got a neuropsych a few years later.

PP with a similar boy ... we think the same exact issue is happening with us! Wants to play, doesn't know how, and too much unstructured time in school (plus a really high teacher-student ratio). I really wish we could find a more structured and supportive school, but it seems like in this area that the ratios get pushed up as high as they can go as soon as licensing permits them to.

How did you determine that the new school offered better structures and support?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many kids are in the classroom and how much structure is there?

My child had aggressive behavior in pre k. She wanted to engage with the other kids but didn't know how. Plus, the school, by design, was uunstructured and let kids take the lead on activities and interactions. This stressed her out, but she didn't have the emotional vocabulary to tell us. When we got her in a more structured supportive school, the aggression completely disappeared.

For a psychologist, I recommend Paula Elitov. She will observe at school and make recommendations. For us, we also had her evaluate and make a provisional diagnosis, which worked well until we got a neuropsych a few years later.

PP with a similar boy ... we think the same exact issue is happening with us! Wants to play, doesn't know how, and too much unstructured time in school (plus a really high teacher-student ratio). I really wish we could find a more structured and supportive school, but it seems like in this area that the ratios get pushed up as high as they can go as soon as licensing permits them to.

How did you determine that the new school offered better structures and support?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How many kids are in the classroom and how much structure is there?

My child had aggressive behavior in pre k. She wanted to engage with the other kids but didn't know how. Plus, the school, by design, was uunstructured and let kids take the lead on activities and interactions. This stressed her out, but she didn't have the emotional vocabulary to tell us. When we got her in a more structured supportive school, the aggression completely disappeared.

For a psychologist, I recommend Paula Elitov. She will observe at school and make recommendations. For us, we also had her evaluate and make a provisional diagnosis, which worked well until we got a neuropsych a few years later.

Thanks for the recommendation. He is in a class of 10 with one lead and one assistant teacher. There is structure to the day but it isn't as rigid a structure as some other schools.

Anonymous wrote:If he doesn't behave like that at home, I would be concerned about what is going on at school. That's pretty extreme behavior. He may need more structure and if he is that bright, more academics. He may be bored, or something more going on.

I would do PT if he has gross motor concerns. OT is for fine motor. Or, try gymnastics, swim, karate or soccer.

There are two types of language - expressive and receptive. Often people assume the receptive (understanding) is as high as the receptive as it can be deceiving. Just because a child is highly verbal does not mean they are understanding everything told. This doesn't sound like an issue here. More going on and I'd be concerned about what is going on at school or it may not be the right fit.

Anonymous wrote:How many kids are in the classroom and how much structure is there?

My child had aggressive behavior in pre k. She wanted to engage with the other kids but didn't know how. Plus, the school, by design, was uunstructured and let kids take the lead on activities and interactions. This stressed her out, but she didn't have the emotional vocabulary to tell us. When we got her in a more structured supportive school, the aggression completely disappeared.

For a psychologist, I recommend Paula Elitov. She will observe at school and make recommendations. For us, we also had her evaluate and make a provisional diagnosis, which worked well until we got a neuropsych a few years later.