Like I told her when she asked, "The dog is a helluva lot nicer to me than you are."

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:No I don't. I had my dog before I met my now DH and if they hadn't gotten along at the beginning of the relationship, it would have been a deal breaker. However, I love my husband and I care about him more than I do our dogs.

How strange.

Your husband had to live up to not only your standards, but your dog's, in order to be privileged to date you.

Lucky him.

My dog is a well behaved and affectionate dog. The only people who don't get along with him are people that actively dislike dogs in general. Which is fine but they are not the kind of people I would want to live with as they are not the kind of people that are ok with having dogs in their living space. I have always had dogs, have been active in dog rescue organizations and dog fostering, and will likely always have dogs. I don't think it's unreasonable to want a partner that is ok with dogs when I have always loved having dogs and want to continue having dogs.

I think dogs are OK and have nothing against them. However--they're very dirty and messy at best. They chew things up, get hair everywhere, crap everywhere, and are generally a source of chaos. Multiple dogs is even worse. I have no problem with dogs per se but do I necessarily want your dog hopping in the bed with me at night? No but that doesn't make me a bad person. Anyone who would put dogs above people has a screw loose. Sorry PP but that's you.

So, in your mind, a single person that has a dog should be willing to give that dog up if a person they've just started casually dating doesn't like their dog because the person they are casually dating is a person and the dog is just a dog? Even though they have no attachment to the person but they have a bond with and an obligation to the dog?

No they don't have to do anything they don't want to do.

Life is about choices. If some people think their relationship with a dog is more important than with a human, that simply means they don't regard the other person very highly. But it's kind of ridiculous to rule out a possible soulmate/life partner (human) simply because he and your dog might not happen to get along. In fact it's downright crazy.

Let me try to put it to you in other terms--let's say you meet a great guy, no problem, he even likes your dog, you get serious, set a marriage date. All of a sudden a previously unknown dog allergy crops up and he simply can't be anywhere around the dog and he can't live in a house where the dog lives because of the hair etc. causing his allergy to flare up.

It actually sounds like you are saying you would give up the human in favor of the dog. If so different strokes but it might explain why a lot of these ladies are stuck loving dogs rather than people in the first place.

Another example, you have this dog you really love, your husband loves it, you have a baby, for whatever reason it bites the baby. Do you get rid of the dog (maybe give it a way, not necessarily put it down) or the baby?

Anyone who is remotely sane has no difficulty at all making the right choice but I can tell you are thinking to yourself: "Baby...or dog? Baby...or dog?" It really shouldn't be such a tough choice for you.

This is a stupid thread to begin with. You can't categorize bonds in this way. It's like comparing how one loves a spouse over a child, a friend over another friend, a parent over a grandparent.There are those that can have very close bonds with animals which transcend what we understand as communication, and bonds for our spouse which involve other means. Those who love their pets deeply have a relationship with them as if they were children. It's not an either/or though.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No I don't. I had my dog before I met my now DH and if they hadn't gotten along at the beginning of the relationship, it would have been a deal breaker. However, I love my husband and I care about him more than I do our dogs.

How strange.

Your husband had to live up to not only your standards, but your dog's, in order to be privileged to date you.

Lucky him.

My dog is a well behaved and affectionate dog. The only people who don't get along with him are people that actively dislike dogs in general. Which is fine but they are not the kind of people I would want to live with as they are not the kind of people that are ok with having dogs in their living space. I have always had dogs, have been active in dog rescue organizations and dog fostering, and will likely always have dogs. I don't think it's unreasonable to want a partner that is ok with dogs when I have always loved having dogs and want to continue having dogs.

I think dogs are OK and have nothing against them. However--they're very dirty and messy at best. They chew things up, get hair everywhere, crap everywhere, and are generally a source of chaos. Multiple dogs is even worse. I have no problem with dogs per se but do I necessarily want your dog hopping in the bed with me at night? No but that doesn't make me a bad person. Anyone who would put dogs above people has a screw loose. Sorry PP but that's you.

NP. What an effing ridiculous thing to say. In the beginning of a relationship there are all kinds of tests a prospective partner has to pass before they can be permanent. Are you, pp, arguing that if I had a few good dates with a dog hater and they asked me to get rid of the dog that I had loved for years that I should do so based solely on the possibility that this relationship panned out? If my DH didn't like sushi at the beginning of our relationship I might not have pursued him, if he hated TV I might have dumped him.

Obviously a person that would prioritize dogs over a spouse either has some issues or the marriage has SERIOUS issues but the idea that while dating one wouldn't prioritize the dog over a boyfriend is ridiculous. Put a ring on it if you want to make such demands. And if someone asked me to get rid of something I loved as much as I love my dog on a whim I wouldn't really think they loved me enough for me to marry them. What a ridiculous oversimplification PP.

Or they have a shitty spouse.

Maybe you can love horizontally, I think many do. Doesn't have to be a 1st, 2nd, so forth.

It's funny this started such a controversy. DH knows that it would have been a deal breaker had he not gotten along with my dog when we met and he has no problem with it.

I had a toy poodle for many years, he was my kid. It was a package deal.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm thinking it depends on the dog and the spouse. If you have a spouse who isn't so great, then I would say the pet wins hands down. A cheater, someone that isn't there for you, put's their in-laws above you, that kind of thing.

People have close bonds with animals, certainly doesn't mean they have a screw loose. I can say there are many pets I would put above some of the crappy people I know or have encountered. Actually some people are shit bags. I've seldom met a shit bag dog or cat, lol.

Unfortunately you're wrong.

Even if my spouse was a cheater, and I hated her guts, if the choice was down to saving her life and that of the family cat or dog, you have to save the human being. That is, if you're sane.

No you don't have to, lol.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No I don't. I had my dog before I met my now DH and if they hadn't gotten along at the beginning of the relationship, it would have been a deal breaker. However, I love my husband and I care about him more than I do our dogs.

How strange.

Your husband had to live up to not only your standards, but your dog's, in order to be privileged to date you.

Lucky him.

My dog is a well behaved and affectionate dog. The only people who don't get along with him are people that actively dislike dogs in general. Which is fine but they are not the kind of people I would want to live with as they are not the kind of people that are ok with having dogs in their living space. I have always had dogs, have been active in dog rescue organizations and dog fostering, and will likely always have dogs. I don't think it's unreasonable to want a partner that is ok with dogs when I have always loved having dogs and want to continue having dogs.

I think dogs are OK and have nothing against them. However--they're very dirty and messy at best. They chew things up, get hair everywhere, crap everywhere, and are generally a source of chaos. Multiple dogs is even worse. I have no problem with dogs per se but do I necessarily want your dog hopping in the bed with me at night? No but that doesn't make me a bad person. Anyone who would put dogs above people has a screw loose. Sorry PP but that's you.

NP. What an effing ridiculous thing to say. In the beginning of a relationship there are all kinds of tests a prospective partner has to pass before they can be permanent. Are you, pp, arguing that if I had a few good dates with a dog hater and they asked me to get rid of the dog that I had loved for years that I should do so based solely on the possibility that this relationship panned out? If my DH didn't like sushi at the beginning of our relationship I might not have pursued him, if he hated TV I might have dumped him.

Obviously a person that would prioritize dogs over a spouse either has some issues or the marriage has SERIOUS issues but the idea that while dating one wouldn't prioritize the dog over a boyfriend is ridiculous. Put a ring on it if you want to make such demands. And if someone asked me to get rid of something I loved as much as I love my dog on a whim I wouldn't really think they loved me enough for me to marry them. What a ridiculous oversimplification PP.

Or they have a shitty spouse.

Maybe you can love horizontally, I think many do. Doesn't have to be a 1st, 2nd, so forth.

It's funny this started such a controversy. DH knows that it would have been a deal breaker had he not gotten along with my dog when we met and he has no problem with it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm thinking it depends on the dog and the spouse. If you have a spouse who isn't so great, then I would say the pet wins hands down. A cheater, someone that isn't there for you, put's their in-laws above you, that kind of thing.

People have close bonds with animals, certainly doesn't mean they have a screw loose. I can say there are many pets I would put above some of the crappy people I know or have encountered. Actually some people are shit bags. I've seldom met a shit bag dog or cat, lol.

Unfortunately you're wrong.

Even if my spouse was a cheater, and I hated her guts, if the choice was down to saving her life and that of the family cat or dog, you have to save the human being. That is, if you're sane.

If my spouse was an abuser, cheater, you name it - my dog or cat would come first. Not some piece of poo.

I'm not crazy about my spouse right now, but I think I like the dog less. At least spouse can help out around the house. Dog has to be walked.

Anonymous wrote:I'm thinking it depends on the dog and the spouse. If you have a spouse who isn't so great, then I would say the pet wins hands down. A cheater, someone that isn't there for you, put's their in-laws above you, that kind of thing.

People have close bonds with animals, certainly doesn't mean they have a screw loose. I can say there are many pets I would put above some of the crappy people I know or have encountered. Actually some people are shit bags. I've seldom met a shit bag dog or cat, lol.

Unfortunately you're wrong.

Even if my spouse was a cheater, and I hated her guts, if the choice was down to saving her life and that of the family cat or dog, you have to save the human being. That is, if you're sane.

Anonymous wrote:I've heard that extremely dysfunctional women can have more of an affectionate bond with their pets than they do with their husbands, because the pets can't talk back, and these women need to feel as if they totally dominate the relationship. These women are very uncomfortable with a differing viewpoint.

This is ridiculous. It really is.

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Anonymous wrote:I'm pregnant but would still choose DH over the unborn baby and my beloved dog. DH is my life partner.

Yikes hopefully after the child is born you'll feel differently.

Hopefully. Currently we could always have another pregnancy. Baby isn't even a real baby yet.

LOL you're crazy aren't you. I feel sorry for your fetus, why not just abort it right now rather than bring it into the hellish world it will face with you as its "mother."

Who wouldn't choose their living husband over a fetus? I know for a fact, DH would choose me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No I don't. I had my dog before I met my now DH and if they hadn't gotten along at the beginning of the relationship, it would have been a deal breaker. However, I love my husband and I care about him more than I do our dogs.

How strange.

Your husband had to live up to not only your standards, but your dog's, in order to be privileged to date you.

Lucky him.

My dog is a well behaved and affectionate dog. The only people who don't get along with him are people that actively dislike dogs in general. Which is fine but they are not the kind of people I would want to live with as they are not the kind of people that are ok with having dogs in their living space. I have always had dogs, have been active in dog rescue organizations and dog fostering, and will likely always have dogs. I don't think it's unreasonable to want a partner that is ok with dogs when I have always loved having dogs and want to continue having dogs.

I think dogs are OK and have nothing against them. However--they're very dirty and messy at best. They chew things up, get hair everywhere, crap everywhere, and are generally a source of chaos. Multiple dogs is even worse. I have no problem with dogs per se but do I necessarily want your dog hopping in the bed with me at night? No but that doesn't make me a bad person. Anyone who would put dogs above people has a screw loose. Sorry PP but that's you.

NP. What an effing ridiculous thing to say. In the beginning of a relationship there are all kinds of tests a prospective partner has to pass before they can be permanent. Are you, pp, arguing that if I had a few good dates with a dog hater and they asked me to get rid of the dog that I had loved for years that I should do so based solely on the possibility that this relationship panned out? If my DH didn't like sushi at the beginning of our relationship I might not have pursued him, if he hated TV I might have dumped him.

Obviously a person that would prioritize dogs over a spouse either has some issues or the marriage has SERIOUS issues but the idea that while dating one wouldn't prioritize the dog over a boyfriend is ridiculous. Put a ring on it if you want to make such demands. And if someone asked me to get rid of something I loved as much as I love my dog on a whim I wouldn't really think they loved me enough for me to marry them. What a ridiculous oversimplification PP.

Or they have a shitty spouse.

Maybe you can love horizontally, I think many do. Doesn't have to be a 1st, 2nd, so forth.

I'm thinking it depends on the dog and the spouse. If you have a spouse who isn't so great, then I would say the pet wins hands down. A cheater, someone that isn't there for you, put's their in-laws above you, that kind of thing.

People have close bonds with animals, certainly doesn't mean they have a screw loose. I can say there are many pets I would put above some of the crappy people I know or have encountered. Actually some people are shit bags. I've seldom met a shit bag dog or cat, lol.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No I don't. I had my dog before I met my now DH and if they hadn't gotten along at the beginning of the relationship, it would have been a deal breaker. However, I love my husband and I care about him more than I do our dogs.

How strange.

Your husband had to live up to not only your standards, but your dog's, in order to be privileged to date you.

Lucky him.

My dog is a well behaved and affectionate dog. The only people who don't get along with him are people that actively dislike dogs in general. Which is fine but they are not the kind of people I would want to live with as they are not the kind of people that are ok with having dogs in their living space. I have always had dogs, have been active in dog rescue organizations and dog fostering, and will likely always have dogs. I don't think it's unreasonable to want a partner that is ok with dogs when I have always loved having dogs and want to continue having dogs.

I think dogs are OK and have nothing against them. However--they're very dirty and messy at best. They chew things up, get hair everywhere, crap everywhere, and are generally a source of chaos. Multiple dogs is even worse. I have no problem with dogs per se but do I necessarily want your dog hopping in the bed with me at night? No but that doesn't make me a bad person. Anyone who would put dogs above people has a screw loose. Sorry PP but that's you.

NP. What an effing ridiculous thing to say. In the beginning of a relationship there are all kinds of tests a prospective partner has to pass before they can be permanent. Are you, pp, arguing that if I had a few good dates with a dog hater and they asked me to get rid of the dog that I had loved for years that I should do so based solely on the possibility that this relationship panned out? If my DH didn't like sushi at the beginning of our relationship I might not have pursued him, if he hated TV I might have dumped him.

Obviously a person that would prioritize dogs over a spouse either has some issues or the marriage has SERIOUS issues but the idea that while dating one wouldn't prioritize the dog over a boyfriend is ridiculous. Put a ring on it if you want to make such demands. And if someone asked me to get rid of something I loved as much as I love my dog on a whim I wouldn't really think they loved me enough for me to marry them. What a ridiculous oversimplification PP.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you care for your dog or cat more than your spouse or partner?

yes.

PP, you realize the issue is with you, not with your spouse or your dog?

And ?

I can replace my spouse. My pet ?

no.