Anonymous wrote:My dad was a professor. My parents were education snobs. My best friend's mom was a poor single mom who had a lot of different boyfriends and had kids with different fathers. My mom hated that my best friend came from this family. She hated when I went to play at their house. Both my friend and mom were beautiful and always had pretty clothes. My parents did not value and/or could not afford fancy clothes for me. My friend was a straight A student and went to Columbia. 20+ yrs later, she is still the most kind and generous friend. Yes, her mom is on like husband number 6 or 7 and has had so much plastic surgery but my friend is humble and amazing.

We drive nice cars and live in a big house. I do not think we are materialistic. I go out of my way not to spoil my children. My kids are really sweet. They have friends from all different backgrounds. Sure, I am not especially fond of the family who allows unlimited tv and video games and eats a ton of junk food. I also don't like the family who seems obsessed with overly healthy food. Most people are somewhere in the middle. It all balances out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My very kind and influential dc just got into a youth group that is supposed to be composed of people in their ethnic, cultural background. The only issue is that these kids have only one thing in common with dc, race/skin color.
They have nothing else in common, not country of origin, religion, language, social class, economic class....
We are different.
The idea for this youth group came from the school and it brings together kids from all over who are labeled the same way on a form with regards to race.
Most of the families are so very different from us. We are middle class (low middle) academicians who teach at local colleges. None of the other families was similar. Many wealthier, many with less money, most less educated. Overall very different.
They simply aren't people that we would spend any amount of time with.
More interestingly, I completely disagree with the opinions of the group leaders. I know that they are trying to help, but to me, they are making matters worse.
I need to explain to dc why this group just doesn't work for our family. Not an easy discussion. Dc liked the group....

Why doesn't the group work for your family? Are you scared of your child mixing with people of different class than you?

Anonymous wrote:My very kind and influential dc just got into a youth group that is supposed to be composed of people in their ethnic, cultural background. The only issue is that these kids have only one thing in common with dc, race/skin color.
They have nothing else in common, not country of origin, religion, language, social class, economic class....
We are different.
The idea for this youth group came from the school and it brings together kids from all over who are labeled the same way on a form with regards to race.
Most of the families are so very different from us. We are middle class (low middle) academicians who teach at local colleges. None of the other families was similar. Many wealthier, many with less money, most less educated. Overall very different.
They simply aren't people that we would spend any amount of time with.
More interestingly, I completely disagree with the opinions of the group leaders. I know that they are trying to help, but to me, they are making matters worse.
I need to explain to dc why this group just doesn't work for our family. Not an easy discussion. Dc liked the group....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My very kind and influential dc just got into a youth group that is supposed to be composed of people in their ethnic, cultural background. The only issue is that these kids have only one thing in common with dc, race/skin color.
They have nothing else in common, not country of origin, religion, language, social class, economic class....
We are different.
The idea for this youth group came from the school and it brings together kids from all over who are labeled the same way on a form with regards to race.
Most of the families are so very different from us. We are middle class (low middle) academicians who teach at local colleges. None of the other families was similar. Many wealthier, many with less money, most less educated. Overall very different.
They simply aren't people that we would spend any amount of time with.
More interestingly, I completely disagree with the opinions of the group leaders. I know that they are trying to help, but to me, they are making matters worse.
I need to explain to dc why this group just doesn't work for our family. Not an easy discussion. Dc liked the group....

First, could you explain to me why this group just doesn't work for your family? Because I don't get the problem with associating with people of a different country of origin, religion, language, social class or economic class.

An Ethiopian-American probably has nothing in common with an African-American whose great grandparents lived in America. A Korean immigrant from Korea may have nothing in common with a Vietnamese-American whose grandparents were refugees in the 70's. Poor Mexican immigrant may have nothing in common with a wealthy Puerto Rican. Can go on and on.

OP here, this pp seems to have the closest understanding of where I am coming from. Every parent in some way selects their child's social circle. In this case, the school selected it and then some adults decided to tell the kids about their culture.
I remember years ago a Russian immigrant who was Jewish got upset when he found out that his child's teacher, who happened to be Russian, but Christian, decided to teach the four kids who were of Russian descent about Russian history. He said that the teacher knew nothing about his Russian history and he did not think it was appropriate for her to teach his son about that topic.
I feel the same way here. Attitudes and perspectives are different even within one country, but definitely within one race.
I don't want my kids to value certain things, I don't want them to have certain views.

I'm black and from another country. After moving here as a child, we lived to predominantly white neighborhoods. Culturally, I have more in common with white Americans because of where I grew up. That means absolutely nothing when I make friends, or with whom I allow my kids to associate. What if all the parents of the white kids in my school/neighborhood decided I wasn't good enough to associate with their kids because I'm black and from a different country. My kids have friends from all backgrounds. Our family was invited to an event for Eid and a Bat Mitzvah in the same month. My focus is on how the friends behave, not how much money their parents have, how educated they are, or what color they are. There is a picture from a summer a few years ago of DC and their friends that we joke looks like a Benetton Ad--not to date myself. It's sad you are so close minded.

NP here. Would you have wanted to be placed in a group of black kids just because you are black? How would you feel if your children were placed in a group by the school because of their race?

I do not agree with why OP does not want her children to be in the group but I can understand not wanting her children to stay in the group.

I wouldn't care if my kids were placed in a group made up of black kids if the group had a positive goal. OP is objecting because she thinks she's better than all these kids/parents, without even knowing them. Her term is "class," so she clearly thinks she is a better class.

Different class. Not better.
I don't ever want a fancy car. I don't ever want my kids to define success by being in charge, and owning everything. These are some of the crazy (IMO) attitudes that were reflected there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My very kind and influential dc just got into a youth group that is supposed to be composed of people in their ethnic, cultural background. The only issue is that these kids have only one thing in common with dc, race/skin color.
They have nothing else in common, not country of origin, religion, language, social class, economic class....
We are different.
The idea for this youth group came from the school and it brings together kids from all over who are labeled the same way on a form with regards to race.
Most of the families are so very different from us. We are middle class (low middle) academicians who teach at local colleges. None of the other families was similar. Many wealthier, many with less money, most less educated. Overall very different.
They simply aren't people that we would spend any amount of time with.
More interestingly, I completely disagree with the opinions of the group leaders. I know that they are trying to help, but to me, they are making matters worse.
I need to explain to dc why this group just doesn't work for our family. Not an easy discussion. Dc liked the group....

First, could you explain to me why this group just doesn't work for your family? Because I don't get the problem with associating with people of a different country of origin, religion, language, social class or economic class.

An Ethiopian-American probably has nothing in common with an African-American whose great grandparents lived in America. A Korean immigrant from Korea may have nothing in common with a Vietnamese-American whose grandparents were refugees in the 70's. Poor Mexican immigrant may have nothing in common with a wealthy Puerto Rican. Can go on and on.

wow-- how sad you think like this

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My very kind and influential dc just got into a youth group that is supposed to be composed of people in their ethnic, cultural background. The only issue is that these kids have only one thing in common with dc, race/skin color.
They have nothing else in common, not country of origin, religion, language, social class, economic class....
We are different.
The idea for this youth group came from the school and it brings together kids from all over who are labeled the same way on a form with regards to race.
Most of the families are so very different from us. We are middle class (low middle) academicians who teach at local colleges. None of the other families was similar. Many wealthier, many with less money, most less educated. Overall very different.
They simply aren't people that we would spend any amount of time with.
More interestingly, I completely disagree with the opinions of the group leaders. I know that they are trying to help, but to me, they are making matters worse.
I need to explain to dc why this group just doesn't work for our family. Not an easy discussion. Dc liked the group....

First, could you explain to me why this group just doesn't work for your family? Because I don't get the problem with associating with people of a different country of origin, religion, language, social class or economic class.

An Ethiopian-American probably has nothing in common with an African-American whose great grandparents lived in America. A Korean immigrant from Korea may have nothing in common with a Vietnamese-American whose grandparents were refugees in the 70's. Poor Mexican immigrant may have nothing in common with a wealthy Puerto Rican. Can go on and on.

OP here, this pp seems to have the closest understanding of where I am coming from. Every parent in some way selects their child's social circle. In this case, the school selected it and then some adults decided to tell the kids about their culture.
I remember years ago a Russian immigrant who was Jewish got upset when he found out that his child's teacher, who happened to be Russian, but Christian, decided to teach the four kids who were of Russian descent about Russian history. He said that the teacher knew nothing about his Russian history and he did not think it was appropriate for her to teach his son about that topic.
I feel the same way here. Attitudes and perspectives are different even within one country, but definitely within one race.
I don't want my kids to value certain things, I don't want them to have certain views.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My very kind and influential dc just got into a youth group that is supposed to be composed of people in their ethnic, cultural background. The only issue is that these kids have only one thing in common with dc, race/skin color.
They have nothing else in common, not country of origin, religion, language, social class, economic class....
We are different.
The idea for this youth group came from the school and it brings together kids from all over who are labeled the same way on a form with regards to race.
Most of the families are so very different from us. We are middle class (low middle) academicians who teach at local colleges. None of the other families was similar. Many wealthier, many with less money, most less educated. Overall very different.
They simply aren't people that we would spend any amount of time with.
More interestingly, I completely disagree with the opinions of the group leaders. I know that they are trying to help, but to me, they are making matters worse.
I need to explain to dc why this group just doesn't work for our family. Not an easy discussion. Dc liked the group....

First, could you explain to me why this group just doesn't work for your family? Because I don't get the problem with associating with people of a different country of origin, religion, language, social class or economic class.

An Ethiopian-American probably has nothing in common with an African-American whose great grandparents lived in America. A Korean immigrant from Korea may have nothing in common with a Vietnamese-American whose grandparents were refugees in the 70's. Poor Mexican immigrant may have nothing in common with a wealthy Puerto Rican. Can go on and on.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My very kind and influential dc just got into a youth group that is supposed to be composed of people in their ethnic, cultural background. The only issue is that these kids have only one thing in common with dc, race/skin color.
They have nothing else in common, not country of origin, religion, language, social class, economic class....
We are different.
The idea for this youth group came from the school and it brings together kids from all over who are labeled the same way on a form with regards to race.
Most of the families are so very different from us. We are middle class (low middle) academicians who teach at local colleges. None of the other families was similar. Many wealthier, many with less money, most less educated. Overall very different.
They simply aren't people that we would spend any amount of time with.
More interestingly, I completely disagree with the opinions of the group leaders. I know that they are trying to help, but to me, they are making matters worse.
I need to explain to dc why this group just doesn't work for our family. Not an easy discussion. Dc liked the group....

First, could you explain to me why this group just doesn't work for your family? Because I don't get the problem with associating with people of a different country of origin, religion, language, social class or economic class.

An Ethiopian-American probably has nothing in common with an African-American whose great grandparents lived in America. A Korean immigrant from Korea may have nothing in common with a Vietnamese-American whose grandparents were refugees in the 70's. Poor Mexican immigrant may have nothing in common with a wealthy Puerto Rican. Can go on and on.

OP here, this pp seems to have the closest understanding of where I am coming from. Every parent in some way selects their child's social circle. In this case, the school selected it and then some adults decided to tell the kids about their culture.
I remember years ago a Russian immigrant who was Jewish got upset when he found out that his child's teacher, who happened to be Russian, but Christian, decided to teach the four kids who were of Russian descent about Russian history. He said that the teacher knew nothing about his Russian history and he did not think it was appropriate for her to teach his son about that topic.
I feel the same way here. Attitudes and perspectives are different even within one country, but definitely within one race.
I don't want my kids to value certain things, I don't want them to have certain views.

I'm black and from another country. After moving here as a child, we lived to predominantly white neighborhoods. Culturally, I have more in common with white Americans because of where I grew up. That means absolutely nothing when I make friends, or with whom I allow my kids to associate. What if all the parents of the white kids in my school/neighborhood decided I wasn't good enough to associate with their kids because I'm black and from a different country. My kids have friends from all backgrounds. Our family was invited to an event for Eid and a Bat Mitzvah in the same month. My focus is on how the friends behave, not how much money their parents have, how educated they are, or what color they are. There is a picture from a summer a few years ago of DC and their friends that we joke looks like a Benetton Ad--not to date myself. It's sad you are so close minded.

NP here. Would you have wanted to be placed in a group of black kids just because you are black? How would you feel if your children were placed in a group by the school because of their race?

I do not agree with why OP does not want her children to be in the group but I can understand not wanting her children to stay in the group.

I wouldn't care if my kids were placed in a group made up of black kids if the group had a positive goal. OP is objecting because she thinks she's better than all these kids/parents, without even knowing them. Her term is "class," so she clearly thinks she is a better class.