Anonymous wrote:We were told by administration that two students were counseled out at the end of the freshman year. One because of behavior and one because of poor academic performance. The school worked very hard at finding another environment for each student. Senior year two students were expelled over winter break for cheating. Whenever I hear someone vehemently curse a certain big three I always wonder if it's one of those two parents.

It speaks very poorly of the school that the administration would share this private information with everyone.

We were told by administration that two students were counseled out at the end of the freshman year. One because of behavior and one because of poor academic performance. The school worked very hard at finding another environment for each student. Senior year two students were expelled over winter break for cheating. Whenever I hear someone vehemently curse a certain big three I always wonder if it's one of those two parents.

We're in a non DC private and suspect that our son will be counseled out at the end of the year.

He is in 3rd grade and was diagnosed in 2nd grade with ADHD and a learning disability. He also has an extremely high IQ which requires academic differentiation. The teachers are catching it on both ends of the bell curve with my kid.

Warning signs- repeated requests for meetings covering the same issues even though we have given input into classroom management. Attendees now include the head of school. DS is getting into significant trouble for small things (i.e. things that other kids also do such as talking in class)-- and in my opinion, blowing many things out of proportion. I think it's to build a case and they want him gone-- easier to do that if they can show he's always in hot water.

In spite of sounding bitter and defensive, I'm a strict parent. If DS does the wrong thing, we advocate for his needs, but we don't defend his misbehavior. In this case, I think he's been mistreated and it's done some damage.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:13:48 here: @14:42 donation was made at the beginning of the year. The admin staff doesn't track the relationship to a child. I just made two donations to our two DCs schools (DCs now in college). I'm sure no one took the time to connect my donation to child. @15:02 why do so many posters think the posts are lies. The woman was our neighbor. She was our friend. She didn't know what to do if her DC was thrown out. She shared.

In what city did this occur? Not Washington DC, correct?

PP, you seem to under- estimate the NW DC parent community greatly.

EVERYONE knows that Advancement and Admissions are two way communication channels. No one in this town is naiive enough to actually hold the belief that admissions is blind to ability to contribute to each and every capital campaign. This is the life blood of Private schools.

What is obviously untrue is your rather ridiculous claim that it was a teacher who told a parent that their child would " not be invited back" and the claim that this occured in a parent teacher conference.

" pulling a contract" or " holding a contract back" is a decision made ulltimately by the HOS, there is a meeting with the Principal behind close doors only after the school makes sure with their lawyer raht the case is air tight and then you get a letter in the mail ( written notice).

Just like the previous PPs, you know nothing about what you are claiming to know.

Actually, I'm paid to know about this

We know, directly, of two counsel-out situations in which there was absolutely no written notice of any kind, and one additional counsel-out that was initiated in a parent conference without prior warning. Sorry PP, but your post is factually incorrect and you should amend it so as not to be misleading.

I call bs, name the school.

If a teacher did that unilaterally, on his/her own in a parent /teacher conference, it would be the teacher's contract that was not renewed.

name the school or you are bulls==ing.

We were counseled out of big 3. DD's grades hovered in the C range during freshman year. Then put on academic warning. Had meeting with class dean and director of upper school saying if grades do not go up she will need to look for a "better fit" for junior year. Grades did not really go up first quarter of sophomore year and she as taking 4 not 5 classes. Met after quarter 1 grades in and told to actively apply to schools. Applied out and was accepted at Edmund Burke, St. Andrews, Holy Child, not accepted at Field, Visi and Holton. Grades marginally improved and school said she could stay - but then said in light of college apps in a few year what schools would she get in to with a 2.3 GPA? Not good ones. Would fare better in college admissions if higher GPA from another school We ultimately sent our DD to Burke. Honors student and got into a selective liberal arts college. Much happier with the different pace and student body. School did us a favor in the end and though the process sucked, they were right.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:13:48 here: @14:42 donation was made at the beginning of the year. The admin staff doesn't track the relationship to a child. I just made two donations to our two DCs schools (DCs now in college). I'm sure no one took the time to connect my donation to child. @15:02 why do so many posters think the posts are lies. The woman was our neighbor. She was our friend. She didn't know what to do if her DC was thrown out. She shared.

In what city did this occur? Not Washington DC, correct?

PP, you seem to under- estimate the NW DC parent community greatly.

EVERYONE knows that Advancement and Admissions are two way communication channels. No one in this town is naiive enough to actually hold the belief that admissions is blind to ability to contribute to each and every capital campaign. This is the life blood of Private schools.

What is obviously untrue is your rather ridiculous claim that it was a teacher who told a parent that their child would " not be invited back" and the claim that this occured in a parent teacher conference.

" pulling a contract" or " holding a contract back" is a decision made ulltimately by the HOS, there is a meeting with the Principal behind close doors only after the school makes sure with their lawyer raht the case is air tight and then you get a letter in the mail ( written notice).

Just like the previous PPs, you know nothing about what you are claiming to know.

Actually, I'm paid to know about this

We know, directly, of two counsel-out situations in which there was absolutely no written notice of any kind, and one additional counsel-out that was initiated in a parent conference without prior warning. Sorry PP, but your post is factually incorrect and you should amend it so as not to be misleading.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:13:48 here: @14:42 donation was made at the beginning of the year. The admin staff doesn't track the relationship to a child. I just made two donations to our two DCs schools (DCs now in college). I'm sure no one took the time to connect my donation to child. @15:02 why do so many posters think the posts are lies. The woman was our neighbor. She was our friend. She didn't know what to do if her DC was thrown out. She shared.

In what city did this occur? Not Washington DC, correct?

PP, you seem to under- estimate the NW DC parent community greatly.

EVERYONE knows that Advancement and Admissions are two way communication channels. No one in this town is naiive enough to actually hold the belief that admissions is blind to ability to contribute to each and every capital campaign. This is the life blood of Private schools.

What is obviously untrue is your rather ridiculous claim that it was a teacher who told a parent that their child would " not be invited back" and the claim that this occured in a parent teacher conference.

" pulling a contract" or " holding a contract back" is a decision made ulltimately by the HOS, there is a meeting with the Principal behind close doors only after the school makes sure with their lawyer raht the case is air tight and then you get a letter in the mail ( written notice).

Just like the previous PPs, you know nothing about what you are claiming to know.

Actually, I'm paid to know about this

Anonymous wrote:What are the early signs of signs of being counseled out? Are there particular catch phrases that I need to be listening for?

LOTS of meetings between teachers and parents, counselor and parents. With comments like "xx really needs to pull up his socks/put more effort/do better". Subsequent letters documenting meetings.
At least those were the signs in 9th grade. By 10th grade my DC was asked to leave his non DC private.

War stories or apocryphal stories aside, counseling out does not happen overnight or without warning. Most often it happens at a school that admits at a younger age (pre-K) but has a very rigorous Upper School and it has become apparent that a child would struggle to find academic success. Sometimes there are sustained behavioral issues -- which could be a child acting out because of academic frustrations. Sometimes there's a diagnosis of learning issues and the school isn't set up to handle learning issues of the type or degree diagnosed.

It is usually a dialogue, and if you and your child are convinced the school is the one for them (e.g., the prior poster's example of boys in middle school with maturity issues who blossom once they grow out of some of the issues), then you can gently push back in the sense of saying "we want to stay, s/he wants to stay, and we're committed to taking steps to help him/her succeed." So, maybe summer school before 9th grade. Or testing to see if the normal range of academic accomodations (such as extra time) will help.

But it's also important to re-assess at natural points (maybe 6th or 8th grade at a K-12 or 4-12 school) if this school is the best place going forward. It's a terrible feeling going to school every day feeling like you're a failure or the "dumb kid in the class," so sometimes the warning signals can be the helpful external nudge you need to overcome inertia and aggressively explore alternate options.

Anonymous wrote:I am sorry. What was the question and how do these outlier stories, if true, have any informative value to the average person in this situation?

This. Please people why argue about the donation factor, I'm not capable of making s large donation nor is my family so can we please get back to the topic. Please.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:13:48 here: @14:42 donation was made at the beginning of the year. The admin staff doesn't track the relationship to a child. I just made two donations to our two DCs schools (DCs now in college). I'm sure no one took the time to connect my donation to child. @15:02 why do so many posters think the posts are lies. The woman was our neighbor. She was our friend. She didn't know what to do if her DC was thrown out. She shared.

In what city did this occur? Not Washington DC, correct?

PP, you seem to under- estimate the NW DC parent community greatly.

EVERYONE knows that Advancement and Admissions are two way communication channels. No one in this town is naiive enough to actually hold the belief that admissions is blind to ability to contribute to each and every capital campaign. This is the life blood of Private schools.

What is obviously untrue is your rather ridiculous claim that it was a teacher who told a parent that their child would " not be invited back" and the claim that this occured in a parent teacher conference.

" pulling a contract" or " holding a contract back" is a decision made ulltimately by the HOS, there is a meeting with the Principal behind close doors only after the school makes sure with their lawyer raht the case is air tight and then you get a letter in the mail ( written notice).

Just like the previous PPs, you know nothing about what you are claiming to know.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does STA council out the boys who can't keep up with the academics? Everyone always says the boys who come from Beauvoir are not prepared well enough for the rigors of STA, so do these boys ever get counseled out?

go away troll

LOL, for the last several years running the majority of boys getting the top academic honors on Prize Day , as well as the three who get the highest honor, have been Beauvoir grads.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:13:48 here: @14:42 donation was made at the beginning of the year. The admin staff doesn't track the relationship to a child. I just made two donations to our two DCs schools (DCs now in college). I'm sure no one took the time to connect my donation to child. @15:02 why do so many posters think the posts are lies. The woman was our neighbor. She was our friend. She didn't know what to do if her DC was thrown out. She shared.

In what city did this occur? Not Washington DC, correct?

PP, you seem to under- estimate the NW DC parent community greatly.

EVERYONE knows that Advancement and Admissions are two way communication channels. No one in this town is naiive enough to actually hold the belief that admissions is blind to ability to contribute to each and every capital campaign. This is the life blood of Private schools.

What is obviously untrue is your rather ridiculous claim that it was a teacher who told a parent that their child would " not be invited back" and the claim that this occured in a parent teacher conference.

" pulling a contract" or " holding a contract back" is a decision made ulltimately by the HOS, there is a meeting with the Principal behind close doors only after the school makes sure with their lawyer raht the case is air tight and then you get a letter in the mail ( written notice).

As an independent school teacher and parent, I agree that most kids who are counseled out end up faring very well at their new schools. I would note, however, that I've also seen a few cases where a school, having initiated this process, nonetheless allowed the student to continue and where the student went on to succeed in the upper school. This is particularly true with boys who are viewed as immature in middle school, but who then develop greater emotional and cognitive maturity. Often the middle school faculty are very surprised to see where these boys end up.

"Counseled out" and "not invited back" sound so much nicer than "expelled" and "kicked out".