Anonymous wrote:I think she's not wording it well but it is frustrating not to be able to plan properly. For example, if there's a large sum coming to her then she might want to reduce her own retirement savings. She might make different decisions now if she wasn't trying to save for college. Imagine that she's facing very low performing schools and trying to figure out if she can afford privates and still save for college. It would be frustrating to learn later that she could have spent more on her kids.

#tinyviolin

I think she's not wording it well but it is frustrating not to be able to plan properly. For example, if there's a large sum coming to her then she might want to reduce her own retirement savings. She might make different decisions now if she wasn't trying to save for college. Imagine that she's facing very low performing schools and trying to figure out if she can afford privates and still save for college. It would be frustrating to learn later that she could have spent more on her kids.

Boo Hoo

Anonymous wrote:I sound entitled because I am entitled. They have told me about this trust fund for years just no details.

God. I hope they spent it. You sound horrible

Serious question, OP:

What is there to discuss?

If it's in your name, you legally should be able to access it.

I get why OP is frustrated by this though. Even if it's just a revocable trust (i.e. no real promise of funds), by the time you're 40 it is nice for parents to have a conversation with you about what plans they have made for aging and after they are gone. My parents have done this with us and we have copies of the documents so we are all prepared in case of an accident or sudden illness. My in-laws have not done this and are not good planners, so whenever something eventually happens (they are not in the best of health), it will be much harder to pull together documents/information and coordinate decisions among the siblings. Putting money issues aside, I think these conversations are responsible among older parents and their grown children. I've seen my parents deal (for years!) with their own parents' estates because it wasn't polite, or something, to talk about money. It's a gift to children to plan well, and then to discuss (even in broad strokes) what those plans are and where documents can eventually be accessed.

Anonymous wrote:I have asked them in the past and they don't give me a clear answer. They are so secretive about their finances but I think at 40 I am a big girl. Married with 3 kids and 300k household income.

Poor lamb!

My daughter does not know about her trust fund. My wife's father set it up. He was going to leave the money to her directly. I suggested and he agreed, to a trust where she gets the money at thirty, but she can use it earlier for education. In her case, the trust will be on the order of 1.4 mil, though that may vary. The primary reason for it is to keep the money away from his other son in law.

Most likely they have a revocable trust that has you as the beneficiary. As such, it is not yours until they die. And it is fluid until they die. Even if they give you details, they can change those continuously by adding or removing assets into the trust.

OP, you are curious, but you really don't need to know until they die. At that point, you, as the beneficiary will be informed of the contents of the trust and if there are and who the executors are. Until then, you just have to be a little more mature about it and stop asking.

You most likely don't know because you are not a Trustee or entitled to any of the current income which makes your standing up in the air unless it is irrevocable then you maybe get the remainder unless it is a perpetual trust than you just get some income upon the demise of the trustees, etc etc. Bottom line is you know nothing because you are entitled to nothing at this point and you will not know what you are entitled to until the current boss is dead and depending on the type of trust they may have spent your inheritance by then so you should probably just MYOB.

I think you are right to ask. If it is really a trust for you, it's possible the trustee is taking funds out of it for their own use. Seems like there is little recourse for that, so you are right to protect your money.

Would your parents answer what kind of a trust it is - if it is their revocable trust, or is it one you are entitled to receive distributions to now or at a set time in the future?

You probably have to wait until either one or both parents die. If you were to get it at certain ages 18,21,25,30,35, etc., then you would know, and you'd already have it.
Who is the trustee? Most likely, he can use it (and keep the income annually) for health and welfare. Which means he can spend it.
My grandmother left me a trust that my aunt can use the income from while she's alive? She's also allowed to take principal distributions for her health and welfare. Guess what? She never saved for retirement and what do you think she's living on? Yep, "my" trust. I doubt I'll ever see any of it considering my grandmother died at 100.

Anonymous wrote:My husband told me his mom has a trust and he and his sister'S names are on it. His sister is listed as the executor. What does this mean ? Isn't it weird my husband doesn't know anything else about the trust? He may be making it up.

Why are you married to a man who makes things up like this?

Anonymous wrote:I sound entitled because I am entitled. They have told me about this trust fund for years just no details.

And.... guess what! They are equally entitled to change their minds!!! Maybe that's what's happened to YOUR money, OP!