I wouldn't ask someone who was driving to bring food like that. Certainly not a casserole, and probably not pie. Rolls or wine, sure.

I love to cook and bring dishes to holidays but now that we live 6 hours away with small kids I don't always bring. If I do it's something very portable like a pie. No one thinks that is problematic.

Go to Walmart and pick up a sweet potato pie.

Just kidding.

6+ hours in the car with small children - no way would I have asked you to bring something!

I would do some internet research and find places to buy the pies and some type of casserole when you arrive. If you are staying at hotel, you could call the hotel and ask for recommendations.

I can relate. My SIL is very insistent that everyone bring something and she'll assign things to people, including the amounts. She'll have everyone bring much more than is needed. We joke that the real party is the next day and that's when she'll serve all the wine, beer, appetizers, etc., that don't get touched.

Anonymous wrote:The pie - okay, sure you can bring that along, but the casserole sounds like a recipe for bacteria.

I'd offer to bake a loaf for cranberry bread instead - travels well.

+1
I don't think it's odd to ask that everyone bring something--even people who are traveling can bring a bottle of wine or something. But traveling with a casserole for 6 hours is gross. Yes to the pie, but ask to bring something more travel worthy instead of casserole.

I have brought the entire meal from my house 10 hours away before. It really isn't that hard. But, no, I don't ask that others bring food. But I never do.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it's a strange request. My FIL used to freeze food and pack it in his luggage with his clothes before a cross-country flight. It kind of wigged me out.

My MIL did this kind of stuff too. She came to visit (about a 1 hr plane ride) after my 3rd child was born and brought marinated meat (I think a roast or something!) on the plane! My 3rd child is 11 now, so I don't remember if this was before the restrictions on liquids? But yes, she had it all wrapped up and brought it on the plane so she could cook it when she got to our house!

Can you renegotiate?

"Happy to do it. Our space will limited though, so if it is all the same to you, we will being something non-perishable, like wine and (bread product)."

I don't think it is terribly strange. They are not putting themselves in your shoes, FOR SURE, but some families are more "potluck" driven and think it is fun.

They may be giving you no-fail items or wanting to be sure to include you. If you ask for a swap out, at least you know what the expectation is.

We are visiting someone just for dessert (they make great pies and cookies) to I offered wine and ice cream (to top it) but that's because I have a short trip.
I once made a cassarole for this group and i thought it was lame (not "foodie" food) and they asked me to make it every time I go to something with their family.
It was a warm compliment.

Family is family. They are not guests.

Anonymous wrote:I would never ask a guest but if a driving one offered to bring something I would suggest something that transports well - sodas, cider, bread/rolls, dessert - certainly nothing requiring refrigeration! Plane or train travelers dragging baggage would never be asked for anything!

+1000

I would never ask a guest but if a driving one offered to bring something I would suggest something that transports well - sodas, cider, bread/rolls, dessert - certainly nothing requiring refrigeration! Plane or train travelers dragging baggage would never be asked for anything!

No, our out of town relatives will probably pay for our dinner out one night.

This Thanksgiving, I'm grateful that I have family to whom I can directly address an issue like this and get a friendly answer, rather than having to worry about how to travel 6 hours with a casserole or how they'll react if I bring one from Whole Foods.

OP, just call them and tell them you're worried about traveling for 6 hours with a casserole and can you bring something else in addition to the pie? If they freak out, then they're weird and you should still bring whatever you can bring in the car with you. Because you shouldn't drive with your casserole and car full of kids if you don't want to. I drive 9+ hours for Christmas with a dog, a cat, a kid, and a husband who hates driving 9+ hours and I wouldn't bring a casserole with me no way no how.

No, I would never ask guests coming in from out of town to bring food. Most might bring wine or beer or something easy, but I definitely wouldn't expect it or make particular requests. I see their traveling to me as gift enough.

I would never ask someone to cook and then bring food if they're traveling. I might ask for a bottle of something, since I don't drink myself and have no clue what people like!