Anonymous
Post 11/12/2015 09:51     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
I was born to teen parents and my father started over by having another family. It sucks because they have a better life than I did. My dad treats me poorly in comparison to them.I can clearly tell that I was unwanted, but I just deal with it.
Anonymous
Post 11/12/2015 06:42     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
Anonymous wrote:My father told me my surrogate mother was a jackal and that I was raised by a cabal of evil anti-priests, and that is why he has to stab me with seven mystical daggers.

Does he hate me?


Did he mean to kill you or just get the demons out of you?
Anonymous
Post 11/12/2015 06:38     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
Anonymous wrote:I was a big accident - mom had me at 19 - oops! I had major issues with this growing up, esp when I got to college and was the age my mom was when I was born. I let it hang me up for a long time, and now I understand that my mom had me because she wanted me, and that I was a blessing in her life.


This!
Anonymous
Post 11/12/2015 06:35     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
Anonymous wrote:My husband's family is pretty open about the fact that the youngest kid was an oops baby. There is no question that he is loved completely. Unplanned =/= unwanted or unloved.


Exactly!
Unfortunately too many kids are getting the opposite message from pop culture. Both mine are "Whoops!", were physically fought for through difficult pregnancies, and are throughly adored.
Anonymous
Post 11/12/2015 06:27     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
Anonymous wrote:I'm 13. My Parents own a Golf Course & Restaurant. In 2014, they did Dinners every Saturday. During one of them, my Mother was talking to one of her friends who showed up. I was on the other side of the room, but I still heard their conversation. Her friend asked if I was the youngest child, and my mother replied with, "Yes, he is my youngest. He was also not planned."
After her friend walked away back to her table, I walked over to my Mother and asked her if that was the truth, to which she replied, "You were an accident."
And then she just walked into the kitchen.

Mother never really seemed to care much about me. She'd always cared more about my siblings and my nieces and nephews.
Does my Mother hate me?


OP, the majority of babies born in the U.S. are unplanned. That doesn't mean they aren't loved. I think your mom has other issues. Ask to go to therapy. Individual or family. It will help you even if it never changes how she acts toward you.
Anonymous
Post 11/12/2015 06:06     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
I feel that your mother used the wrong term to let you know that you were a happy surprise.

I won't sugarcoat anything here. That was truly cruel of your mom to say this to you directly.

She owes you an apology as well as a year of counseling.

I am so sorry OP. I really am..
Anonymous
Post 11/10/2015 21:10     Subject: Re:My Mother told me I was an accident.
I'm pretty sure that except for people with fertility problems where everything is planned, many babies are "accidents"
Anonymous
Post 11/10/2015 21:05     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
I was an accident. My mom openly tells me that she was really shocked and she had hoped to space me and my sister out more.

I don't think this reflects on her love for you at all
Anonymous
Post 11/10/2015 20:53     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
My parents weren't married. My Mom got pregnant to trap my Dad into marriage. He still wouldn't marry her. So she was on the way to the airport to her home country where abortions were legal (not legal in the US at the time). Dad franticly begged her not to leave and abort me. So he married her.

Not a great start, but they both love and adore me. And they are still married 40+ years later.
Anonymous
Post 11/10/2015 20:25     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
I prefer to call it a "blessing" (not accident). A surprise well loved!
Anonymous
Post 11/10/2015 20:16     Subject: Re:My Mother told me I was an accident.
HA HA !

So was my brother, myself, my sisters, my kids ...

If most people actually planned for kids, there would be none.

But, she didn't kill you in the womb. Be grateful you're alive.
Anonymous
Post 11/10/2015 19:56     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
19:56- "my parents loved each other..." Oy.
Anonymous
Post 11/10/2015 19:56     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
My siblings and I were all accidents. They were married and loved each other and us.

My kid was an accident. I am pro choice so my decision to have her as an unmarried woman should tell her how much I wanted her.
Anonymous
Post 11/10/2015 19:49     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
Anonymous wrote:My brother was an accident too. He's clearly the favorite.


+1.
I could have written this. My Mom says she cried when she found out she was pregnant again, BECAUSE I WAS SUCH A HELLION TODDLER and how could she handle two.
Fortunately, he was a much calmer baby.
Anonymous
Post 11/10/2015 19:04     Subject: My Mother told me I was an accident.
Op most people were "accidents"! It's not a big deal. That's probably why your mom didn't couch the news very gently.