We are DCUM poor. About $200K between us and at age 50 in our careers that's going to be the max. One kid in college and another within a year. No nannies, no summer homes, no housekeeper, no therapists. We cut our own grass. Our cars are both 5+ years old, but paid for.

I'd not trade any of it for some of the stuff I read here.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I'm the kind of idiot who believes that you don't divorce kids; step parenting is a commitment for life.

Sorry, the child's real father can pay for college.

"Real" father is deceased and has been for 4 years. My fiancé stepped up voluntarily.

I almost did but I couldn't go through with it at the end because he lacked ambition and didn't want to change his (or our) situation. If I saw potential in him, or if I felt he would strive for more in life, I would've stayed.

[He's 34, making $24,000 / year, and content with his parents paying for everything and milking it for as long as he can]

You are not the only one. Take a break from dcum, maybe?

Anonymous wrote:

I'm the kind of idiot who believes that you don't divorce kids; step parenting is a commitment for life.

Sorry, the child's real father can pay for college.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Real-world poor or DCUM poor?

My thoughts exactly.

Kinda midway between the two. Enough to pay the bills and keep our ten year old cars running. Not enough for vacations or luxuries beyond cable & internet.

If it is any consolation, I have good friends who drive 15 year old luxury cars. Their big new house is paid off. I think their beach house is, too. But they are humble, and they like their old cars.

That's awful. I feel terrible for you. Hopefully things will work out soon.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I'm marrying a teacher.

Teachers aren't poor...unless you live in the south.

I have to pick and choose which bills to pay every month. For people with advanced degrees, I think that's poor.

I am a teacher. If you cannot pay your bills every month then you mishandle your money. Teachers in our area make good money.

I make around $54K per year. I have 2 kids and one has special needs so I end up paying for certain therapies OOP. My ex thinks that paying the entire amount of court ordered child support is "absurd!" so I can't count on that. I don't mishandle my money. I just don't make enough to get by in this area.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

My fiance also teaches and brings in just under 80k. He voluntarily pays college tuition for his stepson from his first marriage and that'll go one another two years.

Anyone paying for the college educations of children who aren't theirs is an idiot.

Investing in someone's education is one of the best things you can do for this world. What do "you" do to make the world a better place?

He's 42 and makes $80k at a non-profit. I'm 35 and make $60k in an admin job. We have a 5 year old.

At this point, we have a 2 month emergency fund and $70k (me) and $30k (him) in retirement. Other than about $3500 we owe the IRS for last year's tax bill and the loans I just took out for the graduate program I'm in, we do not have debt.

Yes, it is stressful. No, I wouldn't trade it for a rich lawyer.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

My fiance also teaches and brings in just under 80k. He voluntarily pays college tuition for his stepson from his first marriage and that'll go one another two years.

Anyone paying for the college educations of children who aren't theirs is an idiot.

See, I was thinking that PP's fiancé was an excellent person.

I'm the kind of idiot who believes that you don't divorce kids; step parenting is a commitment for life.

Thanks! He is a good man.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I'm marrying a teacher.

Teachers aren't poor...unless you live in the south.

I have to pick and choose which bills to pay every month. For people with advanced degrees, I think that's poor.

I am a teacher. If you cannot pay your bills every month then you mishandle your money. Teachers in our area make good money.

Anonymous wrote:No, I'm marrying a teacher.

Teachers are not poor.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

My fiance also teaches and brings in just under 80k. He voluntarily pays college tuition for his stepson from his first marriage and that'll go one another two years.

Anyone paying for the college educations of children who aren't theirs is an idiot.

See, I was thinking that PP's fiancé was an excellent person.

I'm the kind of idiot who believes that you don't divorce kids; step parenting is a commitment for life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I'm marrying a teacher.

Teachers aren't poor...unless you live in the south.

I have to pick and choose which bills to pay every month. For people with advanced degrees, I think that's poor.