If traditional hiring isn't working there are some other options.

1. Find a place that knows you. My SIL with a masters from an Ivy, took 12 years off from the workforce. She volunteered a lot at her youngest's pre-school. She offered to step in when they had issues - from admin to teaching. A position opened up and they offered it to her. Now she is employed full time, loves it and has some more recent work history to get back into her field.

2. Really small companies may be more flexible. Like under 50 (or 10 ppl). It's a way to get in the door, get something on your resume and then pivot to your next step.

3. Freelance, consult or contract. I've had a few friends who took up some side gigs before getting back to full time. Lawyers, business, marketing, federal - find one client and you have a business/job to put on your resume before interviewing. Obviously this is contingent on your field and skill set.

4. Research and find a VERY large company with a culture that promotes diversity and women. My current company generally would choose a SAHM with a story about getting into the workforce over a new grad. I tend to feel that we are really lopsided in our workforce as I'm a younger emplyee at 36 --- but, this could work to your advantage.

Best of luck. I admit I was a hiring manager twice for a situation like yours. My advice is if you are going for the lower level to be aware of your presentation. The first time a SAHM applied for a $30k a year 0-1 year experience entry level job. She spoke about 10 years of expertise and how she couldn't fulfill the travel requirement and needed to come in late and leave early to pick up her kids. She did not get a second interview. We wanted someone who we could mold, had flexibility etc.

The second time it was for a mid level manager spot. The woman kept open a freelancing business the last year of staying at home. She got through 3 rounds of interviews. Unfortunately, the panel selected another candidate -- but this woman got a great job elsewhere shortly after.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP, but I don't feel bad. This is a conscious choice you made, to give up your career and be supported by your husband, and you are now perceived as always putting career on the back burner. PTSA and HOA simply don't translate to the real world.

^^ burned by the ex-wife for alimony, are ya?

Uh, hardly. I'm a (female, with young kids) hiring manager who would never pass up a motivated young recent grad for someone who quit voluntarily and is now out of the game. Harsh but true. Based on OP's post I'm not alone.

You do understand that sometimes there are extenuating circumstances that are carefully weighed before a woman decides to quit her career and stay at home. It could be a special needs child, sick parents, husbands career involving travel, or maybe there are no pressing circumstances other than a mother choosing to be the primary caretaker of their child.

I know of not one SAHM that made this decision lightly, it is done because it is felt to be the best thing for that particular family at that given time. That should not forever more make a perfectly capable, smart, mature woman rendered unemployable. Taking several years off to raise a family (not just sit around eating cupcakes and playing video games) does not negate the decades of "working" life a person could have and also does not deem them as unmotivated.

The very fact that as a woman you could judge and dismiss so harshly another woman for valid life choices or circumstances because it is not the path that you would have chosen is arrogant and disturbingly sad.

AMEN GIRLFRIEND!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP, but I don't feel bad. This is a conscious choice you made, to give up your career and be supported by your husband, and you are now perceived as always putting career on the back burner. PTSA and HOA simply don't translate to the real world.

^^ burned by the ex-wife for alimony, are ya?

Uh, hardly. I'm a (female, with young kids) hiring manager who would never pass up a motivated young recent grad for someone who quit voluntarily and is now out of the game. Harsh but true. Based on OP's post I'm not alone.

You do understand that sometimes there are extenuating circumstances that are carefully weighed before a woman decides to quit her career and stay at home. It could be a special needs child, sick parents, husbands career involving travel, or maybe there are no pressing circumstances other than a mother choosing to be the primary caretaker of their child.

I know of not one SAHM that made this decision lightly, it is done because it is felt to be the best thing for that particular family at that given time. That should not forever more make a perfectly capable, smart, mature woman rendered unemployable. Taking several years off to raise a family (not just sit around eating cupcakes and playing video games) does not negate the decades of "working" life a person could have and also does not deem them as unmotivated.

The very fact that as a woman you could judge and dismiss so harshly another woman for valid life choices or circumstances because it is not the path that you would have chosen is arrogant and disturbingly sad.

Anonymous wrote:I think you are shooting too low. I wouldn't hire someone with your education and experience for an entry level job (and certainly not am internship), but I have hired many mothers returning to the workforce for mid level jobs with lots of flexibility.

You don't lose all your education and experience due to a career break, so stop acting apologetic and willing to start from the bottom. My guess is you are not portraying confidence and are seeming maybe a bit meek because you are over compensating for the time off. The self doubt about the break shines through in interviews, so work on your own paradigms and perception.

+1

my sister aimed too low at first after doing SAH and got nothing. She was not successful until she aimed higher.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP, but I don't feel bad. This is a conscious choice you made, to give up your career and be supported by your husband, and you are now perceived as always putting career on the back burner. PTSA and HOA simply don't translate to the real world.

^^ burned by the ex-wife for alimony, are ya?

Uh, hardly. I'm a (female, with young kids) hiring manager who would never pass up a motivated young recent grad for someone who quit voluntarily and is now out of the game. Harsh but true. Based on OP's post I'm not alone.

Just another example of women attacking other women for making different choices. Women are so much worse to other women that men every have or ever will be. Shameful.

Agree! My worst work situation have been when a woman was my direct supervisor. Why?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP, but I don't feel bad. This is a conscious choice you made, to give up your career and be supported by your husband, and you are now perceived as always putting career on the back burner. PTSA and HOA simply don't translate to the real world.

Alimony = a woman without pride

Alimony=one smart cookie who knows her worth!

Anonymous wrote:I think you are shooting too low. I wouldn't hire someone with your education and experience for an entry level job (and certainly not am internship), but I have hired many mothers returning to the workforce for mid level jobs with lots of flexibility.

You don't lose all your education and experience due to a career break, so stop acting apologetic and willing to start from the bottom. My guess is you are not portraying confidence and are seeming maybe a bit meek because you are over compensating for the time off. The self doubt about the break shines through in interviews, so work on your own paradigms and perception.

This! They aren't hiring you because you are overqualified. Or perhaps your skills are not outdated in the industry. Do you attend your field's annual conferences? Have you done any professional development in recent years. How about hiring a career coach? The conferences will give you insight into the who's who of your field and let you connect with others in your field who will consider you when a position opens up. You have to be more aggressive these days. Gone are the days of passively sitting around for a phone call from an interested employer. How can you get noticed in your field? Do you blog? If not consider it. Can you be a consultant? Can you work as a temp for a while? These are all ways that might be able to get your foot back in the door.

Another vote for preferring older and more experienced workers, despite a gap, to fresh out of school candidates with no real world experience.

Anonymous wrote:I'm a federal hiring manager and I have no problems hiring a SAHM who's ready to come back. I have a mix of staff and use the entry level positions as a doorway to more middle and upper level positions. While I like enthusiastic, eager candidates, I'm also interested in level headed, emotionally mature candidates. My expectation is that someone will be in an entry level position for about 2 years and move to another position - either within my office or elsewhere in the agency.

Ditto this only I staff government contracts. I find older workers more reliable and prefer to hire women with children, frankly. They are 100% *on* and focused at work FTMP since they are used to multitasking 24-7. Men and younger workers fresh out of college waste so much time in meetings (men) and dicking around on the internet (men and millenials).

Op, I think you may want to aim higher and apply to a variety of positions. I am in a similar boat, but took time off for my health instead, and it's turned into a much longer time off from work than I expected.

When I was a search committee chair, and childless, I remember I wanted to interview a former SAHM for a professional position--my supervisor (a mom) and the other committee member (also a mom) absolutely and completely refused to interview her. Instead they insisted we interview the SAHM who looked like a religious nutcase to me. The only difference was that the first SAHM was divorcing and explained her issue in the cover letter, while the second was married and had worked for a very recognizable company a while back--even though the experience was not useful for the job. It was nuts. The first woman was definitely more qualified, and the second woman was awful and bombed the interview. We ended up hiring another candidate entirely.

My point is that managers and some hiring committee members have their own biases and you may need to keep looking until you find a more open minded person. The managers who are mothers may or may not be as open as you think they would be.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP, but I don't feel bad. This is a conscious choice you made, to give up your career and be supported by your husband, and you are now perceived as always putting career on the back burner. PTSA and HOA simply don't translate to the real world.

^^ burned by the ex-wife for alimony, are ya?

Uh, hardly. I'm a (female, with young kids) hiring manager who would never pass up a motivated young recent grad for someone who quit voluntarily and is now out of the game. Harsh but true. Based on OP's post I'm not alone.

So, do you believe the "out of the game" person will not work as hard or as well, or do you simply feel they should be punished for their choice?
If it is the former, do you have evidence that supports this beyond confirmation bias?

It is unfair for you to make so many assumptions, and you are bordering on sexism and ageism. Women get 6-12 weeks of leave after birth, must pay crazy amounts for childcare, and generally have to work harder than men to be recognized... and you blame the SAHM. I don't think you would be so critical if you were truly secure in your decision - not because you have any reason to feel guilty about keeping your job and outsourcing childcare, but because that's how people tend to be. Insecure people tend to be excessively critical and judgmental of others. Confident, mature people - not so much.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP, but I don't feel bad. This is a conscious choice you made, to give up your career and be supported by your husband, and you are now perceived as always putting career on the back burner. PTSA and HOA simply don't translate to the real world.

^^ burned by the ex-wife for alimony, are ya?

Uh, hardly. I'm a (female, with young kids) hiring manager who would never pass up a motivated young recent grad for someone who quit voluntarily and is now out of the game. Harsh but true. Based on OP's post I'm not alone.

Just another example of women attacking other women for making different choices. Women are so much worse to other women that men every have or ever will be. Shameful.

No, it's an example of a hiring manager acting rationally. You seem to think she owes you special consideration or something.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP, but I don't feel bad. This is a conscious choice you made, to give up your career and be supported by your husband, and you are now perceived as always putting career on the back burner. PTSA and HOA simply don't translate to the real world.

^^ burned by the ex-wife for alimony, are ya?

Uh, hardly. I'm a (female, with young kids) hiring manager who would never pass up a motivated young recent grad for someone who quit voluntarily and is now out of the game. Harsh but true. Based on OP's post I'm not alone.

Sounds open minded.

I'm a federal hiring manager and I have no problems hiring a SAHM who's ready to come back. I have a mix of staff and use the entry level positions as a doorway to more middle and upper level positions. While I like enthusiastic, eager candidates, I'm also interested in level headed, emotionally mature candidates. My expectation is that someone will be in an entry level position for about 2 years and move to another position - either within my office or elsewhere in the agency.

Chiming in to say that I also think you should aim higher, for all the reasons stated previously. Show them you mean it and know your stuff.