Anonymous
Post 07/28/2015 10:48     Subject: estranged mom might be showing up on my doorstep
Highly recommend The Gift of Fear. Title sounds crazy, but it has hugely helpful information in dealing with manipulative people.
Anonymous
Post 07/28/2015 09:57     Subject: estranged mom might be showing up on my doorstep
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I packed an overnight bag and checked into a hotel.

According to our security camera she didn't come back. i called her, told her it wasn't ok to come to our house. She said "fine. I'm going home"

So, color me surprised that nothing more has happened.

Of course, she could be lying. Or she could do this again at a later date. But for now... I guess things are ok for now.


You know that by calling her you are encouraging her to engage and come back, don't you?


Do you have constructive suggestions for what OP CAN do besides sitting home in dread?


I'm sorry I wasn't more clear - 'Don't have any contact with your mother, OP. Any contact is engagement on only encourages her to act in ways that get your attention.'


But in the event it escalates, OP has "proof" that she was clear with her mother that attention wasn't wanted. Otherwise it could be construed that her mother never knew she was not welcome to contact, just that she never was able to reach her. This makes things abundantly clear.