Anonymous
06/16/2015 15:16
Subject: Re:I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Anonymous wrote:You can use generalizations and stereotypes to determine whether a specific relationship between two people will work or whether a certain facet of their relationship will matter. When you get that fine tuned, you have to go by the individuals. You wouldn't think to ask "do you think my boyfriend will like a purple shirt for a gift? Or should I get go with the tried and true blue for a guy?" because individual tastes and preferences are exactly that--individual.
I met my wife when I was 33 and she was 38. We were marrieda t 37 and 42. 13 years and 2 kids later, we're quite happily married and frankly, the age difference has never mattered. What mattered was whether we were at the same stages of our lives (ready to commit to a monogamous relationship, ready to get married, ready to have kids, etc) and whether we had enough in common to sustain a long-term relationship. We did and we do.
That should start "You can't use..."
Anonymous
06/16/2015 15:15
Subject: Re:I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
You can use generalizations and stereotypes to determine whether a specific relationship between two people will work or whether a certain facet of their relationship will matter. When you get that fine tuned, you have to go by the individuals. You wouldn't think to ask "do you think my boyfriend will like a purple shirt for a gift? Or should I get go with the tried and true blue for a guy?" because individual tastes and preferences are exactly that--individual.
I met my wife when I was 33 and she was 38. We were marrieda t 37 and 42. 13 years and 2 kids later, we're quite happily married and frankly, the age difference has never mattered. What mattered was whether we were at the same stages of our lives (ready to commit to a monogamous relationship, ready to get married, ready to have kids, etc) and whether we had enough in common to sustain a long-term relationship. We did and we do.
I met my wife when I was 33 and she was 38. We were marrieda t 37 and 42. 13 years and 2 kids later, we're quite happily married and frankly, the age difference has never mattered. What mattered was whether we were at the same stages of our lives (ready to commit to a monogamous relationship, ready to get married, ready to have kids, etc) and whether we had enough in common to sustain a long-term relationship. We did and we do.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 15:14
Subject: I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I was you OP. By the time I heard my dh real age I about lost it but it was too late as I loved him.
Two kids later me 41 he 36& everything is still grand!
Similar here. DH was 24 and I was 29 when we met and I had no idea. He was a superstar and we were the same level. Someome mentioned his age and I thought it was a joke. If anything, he was more ready for marriage and kids than I was. We married at 27/32 and had a child when we were 33/38. We are happy as clams and people assume I am the younger one.
The individuals involved are what counts.
+1 My best friend met her husband when she was 31 and he was 25, never seen a couple more in love than those 2.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 15:08
Subject: I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Anonymous wrote:I was you OP. By the time I heard my dh real age I about lost it but it was too late as I loved him.
Two kids later me 41 he 36& everything is still grand!
Similar here. DH was 24 and I was 29 when we met and I had no idea. He was a superstar and we were the same level. Someome mentioned his age and I thought it was a joke. If anything, he was more ready for marriage and kids than I was. We married at 27/32 and had a child when we were 33/38. We are happy as clams and people assume I am the younger one.
The individuals involved are what counts.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 15:07
Subject: Re:I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:He will leave you for someone his age or younger OP trust me.
this is my fear as well. when he is ready to get married he will dump you and propose to a much younger girl.
Guy here. I really think guys give way less of a shit about their significant other's age than women do. It is not impossible this relationship will fall apart because OP is ready to get married and this guy doesn't feel ready yet. It will not fall apart because one day the guy wakes up and thinks "She is 32 and I'd really rather be with a 28 year old." Guys do not have that thought.
Most guys want younger woman, in 5 years he is the 29 year old and can still date a 24 or 25 year old and has plenty of time to settle down, OP will be middle aged by then.
Are you male?
pp here no i'm a women and unfortunately i talk from experience.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 14:52
Subject: I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Definitely not! Have fun OP, and enjoy the ride (pun intended!)
Anonymous
06/16/2015 14:51
Subject: I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
The "guys want younger women" thing doesn't really kick in until they get into their 30s and start realizing that if they want to settle down start a family, they can't really date women much past their mid 30s. That's when men are at their most age-picky.
I can see a late-20s male being fine with an early 30s women. A late 30s male is not typically going to want to date an over 40 woman, assuming he wants kids. There's a painful age barrier I'm your mid thirties that we all have to deal with one way or another.
I can see a late-20s male being fine with an early 30s women. A late 30s male is not typically going to want to date an over 40 woman, assuming he wants kids. There's a painful age barrier I'm your mid thirties that we all have to deal with one way or another.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 14:23
Subject: I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
The complaints you all are worried about regarding him wanting a younger woman won't occur to him for a long time.
By then, the same thing would happen--if it were going to happen--even if they are the same age.
By then, the same thing would happen--if it were going to happen--even if they are the same age.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 14:19
Subject: Re:I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:He will leave you for someone his age or younger OP trust me.
this is my fear as well. when he is ready to get married he will dump you and propose to a much younger girl.
Guy here. I really think guys give way less of a shit about their significant other's age than women do. It is not impossible this relationship will fall apart because OP is ready to get married and this guy doesn't feel ready yet. It will not fall apart because one day the guy wakes up and thinks "She is 32 and I'd really rather be with a 28 year old." Guys do not have that thought.
Most guys want younger woman, in 5 years he is the 29 year old and can still date a 24 or 25 year old and has plenty of time to settle down, OP will be middle aged by then.
Are you male?
Anonymous
06/16/2015 14:11
Subject: Re:I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:He will leave you for someone his age or younger OP trust me.
this is my fear as well. when he is ready to get married he will dump you and propose to a much younger girl.
Guy here. I really think guys give way less of a shit about their significant other's age than women do. It is not impossible this relationship will fall apart because OP is ready to get married and this guy doesn't feel ready yet. It will not fall apart because one day the guy wakes up and thinks "She is 32 and I'd really rather be with a 28 year old." Guys do not have that thought.
Most guys want younger woman, in 5 years he is the 29 year old and can still date a 24 or 25 year old and has plenty of time to settle down, OP will be middle aged by then.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 14:04
Subject: Re:I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:He will leave you for someone his age or younger OP trust me.
this is my fear as well. when he is ready to get married he will dump you and propose to a much younger girl.
Guy here. I really think guys give way less of a shit about their significant other's age than women do. It is not impossible this relationship will fall apart because OP is ready to get married and this guy doesn't feel ready yet. It will not fall apart because one day the guy wakes up and thinks "She is 32 and I'd really rather be with a 28 year old." Guys do not have that thought.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 14:02
Subject: Re:I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Anonymous wrote:He will leave you for someone his age or younger OP trust me.
this is my fear as well. when he is ready to get married he will dump you and propose to a much younger girl.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 13:59
Subject: Re:I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
He will leave you for someone his age or younger OP trust me.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 13:53
Subject: Re:I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I'm 33 and DH is 26. When we first started dating, I didn't think it was going to lead to marriage. He was fun to be with and I enjoyed his company. He was actually the one that wanted to get serious and I hesitated a little because of the age gap. I was also uncomfortable about other people knowing about the age difference; it seems like other people make a big deal if it's an older woman dating a younger guy. When my mother found out about the age gap, she remarked that I "got lucky." I wanted to avoid comments like that. Other than that, what I thought would be a problem is virtually nothing. I even forgotten that he's quite younger than me. I don't see his age, or his youth. The only time it matters or when it's apparent is when I make 80s/90s pop references and he doesn't catch it.
At what age did you meet your dh? My husband is 7 years younger too, met him when i was 33 and he was 26 exactly the age you and your husband are now, 10 years and 3 children later and we are still happy, go for it op you never know.
Pp here. I met him when I was 31. We just got married this year. What age did you have your first child? I know of another couple where DH is 32 and DW is 37. They seen to be happy, no kids though.
I had my first at 37 and twins at 39, got pregnant both times naturally.
Anonymous
06/16/2015 13:52
Subject: I'm 29 he is 24, is that too much of a gap?
I don't think it's a big deal. If the genders were reversed, no one would bat an eyelash.
My concern is that a 24 year old man has all the time in the world before he has to settle down. He can goof off for the next 15 years, get married at 39 and be fine.
A 29 year old woman still has time, but he has a bit of leverage here. Just don't let things drift for more than a couple of years without a serious commitment from him. You don't want to wait until you're 35 and find that he's "not ready" and have to start over and go into panic mode.
My concern is that a 24 year old man has all the time in the world before he has to settle down. He can goof off for the next 15 years, get married at 39 and be fine.
A 29 year old woman still has time, but he has a bit of leverage here. Just don't let things drift for more than a couple of years without a serious commitment from him. You don't want to wait until you're 35 and find that he's "not ready" and have to start over and go into panic mode.