I feel that spanking creates a scared child, and later that fear comes out as anger.

Anonymous wrote:Willfully disobeying. Defiance. Talking back. Safety violations.

This exactly. And lying.

OP of this thread here: I am not the OP of the other thread.
I don't know why those of you that don't spank bothered posting, your opinion was on the other thread already.
I was curious for those that do spank to find out why/what reasons.
Thanks to those of you that responded honestly, IMO most of the reasons given on here, safety etc get a free pass from me for your decision.

Anonymous wrote:

The studies show that habitual spanking is bad, not that an occasional swat is bad.

I've only hit my child once, when he was a toddler. To get his attention quickly for a safety issue.

I didn't do it again, but I've definitely yelled at my child to get his attention. Sometimes, all the time outs and sitting down and talking to them just doesn't work.

What are you talking about? I have only seen a couple of studies on this, and they say exactly the opposite. Using spanking as a discipline method is fine. Losing your shit and hitting your kid on occasion is bad.

Anonymous wrote:I spanked once after TWO HOURS of trying to put DC in time-out, him getting up and running away, me carrying him back, him getting up and running away, etc.

Me too. That's the rule. If you get out of time out, you get a spanking. (starting around age 4)

They also get spankings for running across the street, hitting me, and hitting a sibling.

I don't do it out of anger. I don't really get angry, and I don't think I have ever gotten angry with my kids, but sometimes I have other shit to do besides put my 4 y/o in time out again and again.

Nothing.

I think kids under 5 are too young to be spanked for any misbehavior. Maybe some dangerous situations would warrant it.

We don't use spanking as a go to punishment. But, we've spanked our kids for:

1. being out of control when we are trying to do something, like get them dressed, dried after a shower, brush their teeth, etc.., and they just won't focus even after we've warned them several times
2. being disrespectful to parents - after a year of trying other discipline methods, and it wasn't working, DS got a smack on the bottom at 8. After that, when DS would go back to his ways, we'd just give him a warning and he'd temper his tone.

The studies show that habitual spanking is bad, not that an occasional swat is bad.

I've only hit my child once, when he was a toddler. To get his attention quickly for a safety issue.

I didn't do it again, but I've definitely yelled at my child to get his attention. Sometimes, all the time outs and sitting down and talking to them just doesn't work.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:safety violations. We've only spanked a handful of times (less than 5 for 2 kids). The last one was when my 5 yo went into the pool by herself, against my instructions. she's never done it again.

"Why do you not go into the pool by yourself?"
- "Because Mommy will beat me if I do."

I wonder if that's the lesson you wanted to teach...How about first getting over your own fear then sitting down calmly, explaining why it is dangerous, teaching your child how to swim safely and how to use the pool responsibly? I seriously don't get parents who think their spanking teaches anything but fear.

NP, but I would imagine the lesson was "Don't go into the pool by yourself."

If it takes a short time of fear to keep them alive, so be it.

Never spanked. I did slap DD's hand away from the hot stove once, and I grabbed her roughly by the ankle once after she kept repeatedly grabbing her baby brother's ankle and pulling him by it. I'm not proud of the latter because mainly I did it because I was frustrated-but it did finally sink in that I told her not to do that because it was painful for her brother. The hand slapping I'm more comfortable with because it hurt less than the burn it saved would have.

We don't spank. Kids are 3 and 5

I "spank" when baby's butt looks cute while going up the stairs

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:safety violations. We've only spanked a handful of times (less than 5 for 2 kids). The last one was when my 5 yo went into the pool by herself, against my instructions. she's never done it again.

"Why do you not go into the pool by yourself?"
- "Because Mommy will beat me if I do."

I wonder if that's the lesson you wanted to teach...How about first getting over your own fear then sitting down calmly, explaining why it is dangerous, teaching your child how to swim safely and how to use the pool responsibly? I seriously don't get parents who think their spanking teaches anything but fear.

I rather a spank than a dead child.

Yes. You are so right. Had you not spanked your kid, she'd be dead. Thank GOD you saved her life.

I spanked once after TWO HOURS of trying to put DC in time-out, him getting up and running away, me carrying him back, him getting up and running away, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:safety violations. We've only spanked a handful of times (less than 5 for 2 kids). The last one was when my 5 yo went into the pool by herself, against my instructions. she's never done it again.

"Why do you not go into the pool by yourself?"
- "Because Mommy will beat me if I do."

I wonder if that's the lesson you wanted to teach...How about first getting over your own fear then sitting down calmly, explaining why it is dangerous, teaching your child how to swim safely and how to use the pool responsibly? I seriously don't get parents who think their spanking teaches anything but fear.

I rather a spank than a dead child.