Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You know that saying "it's as easy to fall in love with a rich man as it is a poor man"? It's true. And smart. As long as you really do fall in love with him. Don't marry for just money but money is icing on the cake. It makes life easier and that is just a fact.

If rich is a necessary element, then it's not icing. It's more like flour.

If money is more like flour, then you are likely to end up just another divorce statistic. The point is that you should be looking for the characteristics of the person that will make the two of your long-term compatible and if that person has wealth or a high paying job, that is a bonus. If you make money a primarly characteristic that you use to select a mate, don't be surprised when your affection and tolerance of each other wanes after 5, 10 or 20 years and you end up in your golden years as a lonely divorcee.

That's what I naively thought when I married my ex. We were both well educated, working in jobs we loved, had the same values, goals, outlook on life (or so I thought), and we loved each other. I knew he wasn't the type to make CEO, but that was ok with me. He would be there for me and for our family. Fast forward 18 years and he totally melted down, couldn't keep a job, was never home, decimated out finances and left me and our three kids deep in debt and penniless. So now I'm a poor divorcee with three kids. So yeah, I guess I should've filtered for money.

If I had money and were the marrying type, you can be damn sure there would be a prenup before I would walk down that aisle. If she balked at a prenup, the I wouldn't be walking be running the other way!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You know that saying "it's as easy to fall in love with a rich man as it is a poor man"? It's true. And smart. As long as you really do fall in love with him. Don't marry for just money but money is icing on the cake. It makes life easier and that is just a fact.

If rich is a necessary element, then it's not icing. It's more like flour.

If money is more like flour, then you are likely to end up just another divorce statistic. The point is that you should be looking for the characteristics of the person that will make the two of your long-term compatible and if that person has wealth or a high paying job, that is a bonus. If you make money a primarly characteristic that you use to select a mate, don't be surprised when your affection and tolerance of each other wanes after 5, 10 or 20 years and you end up in your golden years as a lonely divorcee.

I would just turn it around. Filter for rich and only consider those. Then look for the right match. My operating mentality is that most people in the world are a poor match for me but that leaves a lot of people. Filter for money.

Anonymous wrote:What rich people are particularly ethical? I'm sure there are some, but I think you are really limiting your pool.

Sour grapes that you're not smart enough to think of a legitimate way to become rich?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You know that saying "it's as easy to fall in love with a rich man as it is a poor man"? It's true. And smart. As long as you really do fall in love with him. Don't marry for just money but money is icing on the cake. It makes life easier and that is just a fact.

If rich is a necessary element, then it's not icing. It's more like flour.

If money is more like flour, then you are likely to end up just another divorce statistic. The point is that you should be looking for the characteristics of the person that will make the two of your long-term compatible and if that person has wealth or a high paying job, that is a bonus. If you make money a primarly characteristic that you use to select a mate, don't be surprised when your affection and tolerance of each other wanes after 5, 10 or 20 years and you end up in your golden years as a lonely divorcee.

Anonymous wrote:You know that saying "it's as easy to fall in love with a rich man as it is a poor man"? It's true. And smart. As long as you really do fall in love with him. Don't marry for just money but money is icing on the cake. It makes life easier and that is just a fact.

If rich is a necessary element, then it's not icing. It's more like flour.

I think everyone would probably be ok with a rich husband. I would be. But he'd also have to be smart, funny, honest, caring and attractive (and attracted) to me.

If you're seeking out "rich" beyond all other traits, that tells me you have an unhealthy attachment to money, or you have an unhealthy desire not to have to be financially pulling your weight. I think all adults should strive to have some degree of financial independence, or they're not really adults. I'm uncomfortable with anyone who is dependent on a spouse or parent for money beyond a certain age.

You know that saying "it's as easy to fall in love with a rich man as it is a poor man"? It's true. And smart. As long as you really do fall in love with him. Don't marry for just money but money is icing on the cake. It makes life easier and that is just a fact.

Sure is.

Watch the 1950's film, "How To Marry a Millionaire" with Marilyn Monroe, Lauren Bacall and Betty Grable and you can see before "feminism" this was once the ultimate goal in a woman's life.

To marry well.

Anonymous wrote:I think it's been brought up before, but what's the difference here between women wanting a man who has resources compared to men wanting a woman they find attractive? The stigma is not the same......the basic criteria is. I don't see men lining up for the great personality older woman because they don't want to be "shallow...." Also, as an aside, anyone can cheat.

I think it's because we have a lot of other, nonromantic, relationships where there are pretty clear rules about when and why you get to use someone else's stuff. If I declined to become someone's friend because he didn't have enough stuff for me to use, that would make me a pretty shitty person. Or if I became someone's friend just to use their stuff, that would make me a shitty person - if not a criminal.

There just isn't much of a nonromantic analog when it comes to relating to people based on their looks. And, after all, if I use someone for their stuff, they have less stuff when I'm finished using them. If I use someone for their looks, they will keep or lose their looks at the same rate as if I wasn't involved.

I think it's been brought up before, but what's the difference here between women wanting a man who has resources compared to men wanting a woman they find attractive? The stigma is not the same......the basic criteria is. I don't see men lining up for the great personality older woman because they don't want to be "shallow...." Also, as an aside, anyone can cheat.

So, OP, in your world, it's okay for a woman to want to marry a rich husband. But is it okay for a man to want to marry a rich wife? Or is he a lazy freeloader?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
It's not bad but make sure he has other good qualities. Men with money will have more women vying for their attention so make sure he is the faithful type. I work with several high paid men and I know several who sleep around. Broke men cheat too. But it seems that some men with money feel it's an entitlement to whore around.


+1


This. I am relatively wealthy, and many of the wealthy men I see in my circles cheat or attempt to cheat.

But sure, money makes other things in life easier. I wouldn't think it a good idea to only look for rich men, but all else being equal, money helps.

The reason they cheat is b/c the women like the money. the money makes life a lot easier.

LOL! Money will make life easier for the DW when she takes half!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
It's not bad but make sure he has other good qualities. Men with money will have more women vying for their attention so make sure he is the faithful type. I work with several high paid men and I know several who sleep around. Broke men cheat too. But it seems that some men with money feel it's an entitlement to whore around.


+1


This. I am relatively wealthy, and many of the wealthy men I see in my circles cheat or attempt to cheat.

But sure, money makes other things in life easier. I wouldn't think it a good idea to only look for rich men, but all else being equal, money helps.

The reason they cheat is b/c the women like the money. the money makes life a lot easier.

Your reasoning or lack thereof makes zero sense. Women like money. Men like money. They cheat because they lack impulse control.
Blame it on something, right?

Don't hate the player hate the game.