Anonymous
Post 06/09/2025 15:00     Subject: Should I have just not said anything?
Anonymous wrote:I work in a hospital, and today I was headed to get some soup in the cafetria, and I noticed a woman had dripped the soup all over the styrofoam container. I do it all the time, the stupid ladles they have are terrible for pouring into the container. Anyways, she was busy trying to clean it up and I essentially said, "Ugh, that happens to me all the time, I know it's so frustrating." I was really just trying to make her feel better, because I always feel mildly stupid when that happens.

She turned around, kept saying "What?" louder and louder, and I thought maybe she was hard of hearing, and I said, "I'm just sorry that happened." She looked at me and said "This is none of your business. What happened here is none of your business."

I apologized (although I'm not sure why), and immediately wrote her off as a being a bit mentally off....

But... I got to thinking. Did I do something wrong? She's right, it's not any of my business, is it not normal to say things like this? I guess I personally kind of like it when someone tries to strike up a conversation like that, but perhaps others don't? Is it wrong that I think she may be mentally off? Perhaps her response was normal? Perhaps she's having a bad day in other regards (after all, she is in a hospital).

I guess I'm struggling with something socially (in terms of colleague relationships) and feeling left out, so I'm second guessing some of my normal social responses.

Perhaps I should just keep my mouth shut in the future if I don't know them.


Just wanted to say, you're not alone here. Do you have any good friends outside of work? I ended up feeling better after talking to an old friend - I didn't even mention the issue I was upset about, but she just said something about how she was so excited to see me in a few months and it made me feel better that someone who knew me so well really liked me and it took some of the sting out of the other issue. Anyway, I hope you feel better about that. (And ignore the lady's response, you were fine).
Anonymous
Post 06/09/2025 14:58     Subject: Should I have just not said anything?
Anonymous wrote:Stop thinking. You were fine. She was embarrassed and took it out on you.


This. She also might not have heard you correctly. Sometimes when people make mistakes they don't want them pointed out, but you weren't wrong in what you said. I mean, I've held the door for people who then glared at me when they walked by so you can't win them all.
Anonymous
Post 06/09/2025 13:19     Subject: Should I have just not said anything?
Anonymous wrote:I work in a hospital, too, and one thing that’s drilled into us is that most of the people who aren’t staff are probably having the worst day of their life - trying to support a loved one who is dying, getting bad news about a test result, that kind of thing. I always practice defensive driving on campus, in the halls, and in the cafeteria. They are having a worse day than I am.


The reception desk ladies at the hospital my dad was in for the six weeks before he died were angels. They'd call me sweetie and honey and were always so welcoming and warm - they'd usually print me out a couple of days worth of badges so I could just go up on the second day. Signing in with them was usually the only bright spot of the visit, them and there was one good CNA and one good nurse. If I had a visit without the good nurse or CNA, it was nice that the reception ladies were there. They clearly took PP's observation above to heart.
Anonymous
Post 06/08/2025 11:49     Subject: Should I have just not said anything?
Anonymous wrote:10 year old thread? WHY?!


27% of old threads are bumped. We are making up stats on this one.
Anonymous
Post 06/08/2025 11:49     Subject: Should I have just not said anything?
Anonymous wrote:Op here. She was black. I'm not. Never considered that would be a factor!


Since we are turning this into a thread that will likely be reported and locked soon - that’s probably not it. She was likely in the hospital and stressed for a number of reasons. Visiting a family member or waiting for someone in surgery and her mind was elsewhere. You were fine. She was cranky.

I talk to black people I don’t know in public all of the time. Her race wasn’t a factor.
Anonymous
Post 06/08/2025 11:48     Subject: Should I have just not said anything?
10 year old thread? WHY?!