Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh. We all have our priorities in life.

I send my children to a weekend school in their native language. They hate it. I told them that I would rather lose my home and be homeless rather than pull them out of that school, because it was their link to our culture and language. End of discussion.

All of my friends have religious school, or their native language school (sometimes two native language schools if their parents are from different countries!), or something else of importance on weekends - your kids are NOT alone.

Leaning another language and culture is much more valuable than being taught that one religion's stories are real and more important than another religion's stories

To you and me, perhaps. But not to the OP and million of other people. Religion is an integral part of culture. It is best to be aware of all major religions, but if OP wants an in-depth experience of *her* religion for her child, that's totally understandable.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh. We all have our priorities in life.

I send my children to a weekend school in their native language. They hate it. I told them that I would rather lose my home and be homeless rather than pull them out of that school, because it was their link to our culture and language. End of discussion.

All of my friends have religious school, or their native language school (sometimes two native language schools if their parents are from different countries!), or something else of importance on weekends - your kids are NOT alone.

Leaning another language and culture is much more valuable than being taught that one religion's stories are real and more important than another religion's stories

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for weighing in, even those who say, in effect, stop torturing your child. The goal is a Bat Mitzvah at age 12, followed by lots of camps (she's still too young for sleepaway camp right now--she struggles with "sleepovers" at friends' houses, which she craves.) I do think that summer camp gives you the best positive experience, and I'm looking for a good religious summer camp, but she likes the camp she attends now. So. I'm encouraged that so many of us disliked Sunday school, but survived and I guess learned something.

We tried a different synagogue closer to home and it was nice but not for us (too religious/conservative). My parents belong to the synagogue we now attend, which is more our speed (relaxed), and my folks are thrilled that we attend. That's part of why we go. I might try the children's services, even though they are early in the morning. I find them dull, but they're short and sweet and she could more easily make a friend there. I will also ask, for next year, that she be placed with someone from her school. She just doesn't seem to reach out to the other kids in her class.

As to why go at all: I think to be culturally literate in the West, you've got to know Adam and Eve, Noah's Ark, David and Goliath, etc. My daughter asks a lot of questions about death and God that I'd like a rabbi to answer since the questions are often beyond me. Yes, we have books at home, but learning in a group matters. The music is also wonderful. I want my daughter to be comfortable in a synagogue, and next year I think they visit and work on some community projects with some churches nearby, which I also value. The synagogue offers a lot. It's kind of like the doctor's office--she doesn't like to go there, either. Yet she must go. Wish I knew how to make it something she values.

Do you go to shul as a family? Do you light candles on Fridays? Celebrate holidays other than Rosh Hashanah/Yom Kippur/Passover? i.e., do you practice what you preach? Or do you just send your kid to Sunday school and call it a day?

I find that kids are often happier to go to religious school at more observant congregations because Judaism is more a part of their family's daily lives. But if none of the things she learns at Sunday school are reinforced in her day to day life, I can see why she'd resent going.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, it's not as if there is anything wrong with the synagogue. The kid hates Hebrew school just like every Jewish child in the history of Judaism.

This made me laugh.

Anonymous wrote:Well, it's not as if there is anything wrong with the synagogue. The kid hates Hebrew school just like every Jewish child in the history of Judaism.

Anonymous wrote:Why has no one asked** which synagogue? I'm dying to know!

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for weighing in, even those who say, in effect, stop torturing your child. The goal is a Bat Mitzvah at age 12, followed by lots of camps (she's still too young for sleepaway camp right now--she struggles with "sleepovers" at friends' houses, which she craves.) I do think that summer camp gives you the best positive experience, and I'm looking for a good religious summer camp, but she likes the camp she attends now. So. I'm encouraged that so many of us disliked Sunday school, but survived and I guess learned something.

We tried a different synagogue closer to home and it was nice but not for us (too religious/conservative). My parents belong to the synagogue we now attend, which is more our speed (relaxed), and my folks are thrilled that we attend. That's part of why we go. I might try the children's services, even though they are early in the morning. I find them dull, but they're short and sweet and she could more easily make a friend there. I will also ask, for next year, that she be placed with someone from her school. She just doesn't seem to reach out to the other kids in her class.

As to why go at all: I think to be culturally literate in the West, you've got to know Adam and Eve, Noah's Ark, David and Goliath, etc. My daughter asks a lot of questions about death and God that I'd like a rabbi to answer since the questions are often beyond me. Yes, we have books at home, but learning in a group matters. The music is also wonderful. I want my daughter to be comfortable in a synagogue, and next year I think they visit and work on some community projects with some churches nearby, which I also value. The synagogue offers a lot. It's kind of like the doctor's office--she doesn't like to go there, either. Yet she must go. Wish I knew how to make it something she values.

Anonymous wrote:Eh. We all have our priorities in life.

I send my children to a weekend school in their native language. They hate it. I told them that I would rather lose my home and be homeless rather than pull them out of that school, because it was their link to our culture and language. End of discussion.

All of my friends have religious school, or their native language school (sometimes two native language schools if their parents are from different countries!), or something else of importance on weekends - your kids are NOT alone.