Anonymous
03/17/2015 19:03
Subject: Re:I regret not going to med school
Anonymous wrote:My husband is 35 and in his first year of residency. He didn't change careers but he was an international grad and practiced abroad for a while, and when he moved to the US it took him a few years of fumbling around to match into US residency.
So far it has been a miserable and very difficult experience.
I spent the first two years of our marriage wondering if I'd have to move away from my own job and family and to some random rural area on short notice, because he had interviews everywhere from North Dakota to Harlem to Florida and the Match commitment was binding. He was open to doing a commuter marriage where he lived in another state, but I was pregnant and I could not have managed. Thankfully he matched locally but after a nerve wracking two years.
We could not delay children further since I am also 35. I had my first just before he began residency and am presently pregnant with our 2nd. DH is rarely home and still is stressed that he isn't able to spend enough time at the hospital to do a really good job (I believe him).
He was unable to take any leave or help at all when my mom got cancer (our infant had just been born) and only got a couple of days of leave when she died. Even then the program asked him why he needed the time ("can't your wife organize the funeral?") (Even if I could have done it alone, I had an infant baby).
We don't have a great deal of money and are dependent on my salary since he makes barely enough to cover childcare. We can't live close to the hospital since I have a job too and am responsible for childcare so I need to be able to do pickups. So on top of never being home he has a long commute into the 'burbs.
The job prospects in his specialty are not good, so he is likely to have to do a couple of fellowships, at which point we will begin all of this again.
At 35, I am already done my own PhD. I am tired. I just want a normal life. I think medicine is fine if you can finish your training on time. If it drags on into your mid 30s and 40s it can cause a lot of havoc in your family life.
Just my $0.02.
-PGY1 wife
Doctor's wife here. We had our first child when DH was in residency and our 2nd when DH was a fellow. Thankfully, our first was born during DH's research block so he was home for 2 weeks. DH took no time off when or 2nd child was born. The surgeon he was working with was irritated that DH took a half day to take us home from the hospital.
I promise you that it does get better! DH now earns a very good living with fantastic hours. I didn't think we would survive those first years but we did.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 19:00
Subject: I regret not going to med school
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Op, I am an ambitious person with health related stamina issues as well. Just turned down an extra project at work due to stamina issues and it was really a struggle to decide so I get your dilemma.
Med school is really really hard on the body. I think it is ridiculous as it hardens doctors, and why should someone have to be super physically strong and have amazing stamina to be a doctor? Oh well, we can't change that.
I wonder if being a physicians assistant would be easier. No idea, but you might want to ask around about that.
I've looked into PA programs. I'm definitely interested, but they required 1,000 hours of patient contact (minus shadowing and volunteering) prior to acceptance. I'm not sure how I'd fit that in given my current job situation. I'm single, so I don't have outside financial support.
From what I know, if you want to get into a decent med school, in addition to good MCAT scores, you need to have lots of research experience in a lab, shadowing or volunteering experience, and meet all the course requirements (such as organic chemistry and etc..). I know many many pre-med majors in a prestigious private school need to take a gap year to meet all these before applying to med school. But if you are just aiming for any med school, I know there are schools in the Caribbean that dont even need MCAT scores.
You are not becoming an orthopedic surgeon with a MD degree from the Caribbean.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 18:57
Subject: Re:I regret not going to med school
DH is an orthopedic surgeon. You have a long road ahead of year. 2 years post studies + 4 years med school + 5 years ortho residency + 1-3 years fellowship = 12 years minimum before you can start practicing medicine.
Have you considered becoming a PA? DH describes PAs as forever residents. They can assist the surgeon during surgery.
Are you female? When do you plan to have kids in this decade+ journey?
We have a friend who started med school at age 38. He will graduate at 42. He already has a family and a supportive wife. I think he is doing quite well in his studies and seems very happy to fulfill his dreams.
Have you considered becoming a PA? DH describes PAs as forever residents. They can assist the surgeon during surgery.
Are you female? When do you plan to have kids in this decade+ journey?
We have a friend who started med school at age 38. He will graduate at 42. He already has a family and a supportive wife. I think he is doing quite well in his studies and seems very happy to fulfill his dreams.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 17:40
Subject: I regret not going to med school
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I've actually researched PM&R. I was interested in entering a PT program out of undergrad. I'm thinking about attempting to contact a physician to do a informational interview or a shadow. Not sure how to go about that.
15:08 here. Unfortunately I'm not from DC, othrwise I would have some contact suggestions. The Student Doctor forums have a lot of good information. This is a good link.
http://forums.studentdoctor.net/threads/updated-mother-of-all-stickies-if-you-need-info-check-here-first.400935/
Thank you
I'm familiar with the forum. I'm not in DC either, but I'll try to leverage my contacts where I am located.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 16:09
Subject: I regret not going to med school
Anonymous wrote:I've actually researched PM&R. I was interested in entering a PT program out of undergrad. I'm thinking about attempting to contact a physician to do a informational interview or a shadow. Not sure how to go about that.
15:08 here. Unfortunately I'm not from DC, othrwise I would have some contact suggestions. The Student Doctor forums have a lot of good information. This is a good link.
http://forums.studentdoctor.net/threads/updated-mother-of-all-stickies-if-you-need-info-check-here-first.400935/
Anonymous
03/17/2015 15:51
Subject: Re:I regret not going to med school
I actually regret going to medical school. Training is very long and grueling. I think you might be idealizing what it would really be like. Orthopedics is a VERY physically intense specialty.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 15:24
Subject: I regret not going to med school
I've actually researched PM&R. I was interested in entering a PT program out of undergrad. I'm thinking about attempting to contact a physician to do a informational interview or a shadow. Not sure how to go about that.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 15:08
Subject: Re:I regret not going to med school
http://www.aapmr.org/patients/aboutpmr/pages/physiatrist.aspx
OP, maybe being a physiatrist (physical medicine and rehabilitation physician) would be a good fit for you. It's not as physically demanding as a surgical field, and some of the medical issues overlap with orthopedics.
My father was a physiatrist, and he treated many kinds of patients, including children, trauma and accident victims, and stroke patients. He is deceased now, and near the end of his life, I met one of his former patients by chance in the hospital. One of the medical technicians had formerly been a policeman who had sustained a brain injury. He said that my father encouraged and supported his new career, even when others thought it would not be possible. My father's former patient actually came in to care for my father while he was dying, and his words provided me tremendous comfort.
I'm a physician, and I'm not sure if hospital administration is what you are looking for. From what I have seen, it's all business. The politics can be brutal. I've seen hospitals blackball individual physicians and force them out.
OP, maybe being a physiatrist (physical medicine and rehabilitation physician) would be a good fit for you. It's not as physically demanding as a surgical field, and some of the medical issues overlap with orthopedics.
My father was a physiatrist, and he treated many kinds of patients, including children, trauma and accident victims, and stroke patients. He is deceased now, and near the end of his life, I met one of his former patients by chance in the hospital. One of the medical technicians had formerly been a policeman who had sustained a brain injury. He said that my father encouraged and supported his new career, even when others thought it would not be possible. My father's former patient actually came in to care for my father while he was dying, and his words provided me tremendous comfort.
I'm a physician, and I'm not sure if hospital administration is what you are looking for. From what I have seen, it's all business. The politics can be brutal. I've seen hospitals blackball individual physicians and force them out.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 15:02
Subject: I regret not going to med school
Pediatric orthopedic surgery career path:
2 years premed classes
4 years med school
5 years orthopedic surgery residency
1 year pediatric orthopedic surgery fellowship
= mandatory 12 years of training.
2 years premed classes
4 years med school
5 years orthopedic surgery residency
1 year pediatric orthopedic surgery fellowship
= mandatory 12 years of training.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 14:57
Subject: Re:I regret not going to med school
Anonymous wrote:OP, what is motivating the interest in medicine? I am wondering whether hospital administration would fulfill that motivation, as it is very different from patient care.
I have a congenital disorder, so I've been exposed to medicine my entire life. I see it as a way of helping others with similar life experiences.
I've always found the human body to be interesting in regards to how all of our systems interact. The administration side is just an option as I have a business background and transferable skills.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 14:45
Subject: Re:I regret not going to med school
http://schools.studentdoctor.net/selector
This link has a quiz to find a specialty that matches an individual's personality.
This link has a quiz to find a specialty that matches an individual's personality.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 14:42
Subject: I regret not going to med school
I regret going to medical school too. I like helping/working with people and would have appreciated having a more financially rewarding job. I am only 30, but having a lot of friends and family members who are doctors I see what kind of lifestyle med school and residency entail and I am not interested in putting my kids through that just so I can have a more fulfilling career. I don't know if it's the right decision, but I think OP should go for it, but recognize that things will be hard when she is ready to have kids.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 14:39
Subject: Re:I regret not going to med school
OP, what is motivating the interest in medicine? I am wondering whether hospital administration would fulfill that motivation, as it is very different from patient care.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 14:31
Subject: I regret not going to med school
Either a Master of Health Administration or MBA with a Healthcare concentration. Plus progressive experience in the field.
Anonymous
03/17/2015 14:26
Subject: Re:I regret not going to med school
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:My husband is 35 and in his first year of residency. He didn't change careers but he was an international grad and practiced abroad for a while, and when he moved to the US it took him a few years of fumbling around to match into US residency.
So far it has been a miserable and very difficult experience.
I spent the first two years of our marriage wondering if I'd have to move away from my own job and family and to some random rural area on short notice, because he had interviews everywhere from North Dakota to Harlem to Florida and the Match commitment was binding. He was open to doing a commuter marriage where he lived in another state, but I was pregnant and I could not have managed. Thankfully he matched locally but after a nerve wracking two years.
We could not delay children further since I am also 35. I had my first just before he began residency and am presently pregnant with our 2nd. DH is rarely home and still is stressed that he isn't able to spend enough time at the hospital to do a really good job (I believe him).
He was unable to take any leave or help at all when my mom got cancer (our infant had just been born) and only got a couple of days of leave when she died. Even then the program asked him why he needed the time ("can't your wife organize the funeral?") (Even if I could have done it alone, I had an infant baby).
We don't have a great deal of money and are dependent on my salary since he makes barely enough to cover childcare. We can't live close to the hospital since I have a job too and am responsible for childcare so I need to be able to do pickups. So on top of never being home he has a long commute into the 'burbs.
The job prospects in his specialty are not good, so he is likely to have to do a couple of fellowships, at which point we will begin all of this again.
At 35, I am already done my own PhD. I am tired. I just want a normal life. I think medicine is fine if you can finish your training on time. If it drags on into your mid 30s and 40s it can cause a lot of havoc in your family life.
Just my $0.02.
-PGY1 wife
I'm so sorry for everything that has happened. I definitely understand what you mean by wanting a normal life. Which is why I am apprehensive. Currently, I work long hours, but I don't expect my body to be in the best shape in 10-15 years. Which is why I mentioned that the administrative side is a better fit. I'd love to have a family, but it's not imperative to do so. I probably will remain single for a while so that's not a big deal
OP, what do you mean by administrative side? There's not much administrative side for someone in pediatric orthopedic surgery.
Meaning a hospital administrator, Director, etc
What training would that entail?