Anonymous wrote:I admire that you still pursue her company despite her not liking you. Honestly, I would be psyched if my mean MIL never visited us.
Anonymous wrote:My ex ILs are like this. They live a plane ride away, but were always very involved in the kids' lives - phone calls, letters, visits, gifts for birthdays/holidays etc. We always reciprocated and the kids sent thank you notes. This year my STBX split up, and it has been radio silence from his entire family, including the grandparents. The kids are confused and hurt, but there isn't much I can do. I have sole custody (ex's choice) I sent holiday presents as cards per usual, but nothing from them. They travel, but haven't even called my kids. STBX has pulled the same disappearing act, so maybe the fruit doesn't fall far from the tree. I just don't get how grandparents can cut off all contact with their grandchildren like that. It's fine if they don't want to talk to me, but the kids? And my kids are old enough to notice (HS, MS and ES). The kids have called them, but the conversations are short and leave the kids more confused. And there are quite a few other grandkids as well, who my ex ILs remain very involved with. At least that's what I hear via FB.
Bottom line, I think people do what they want to do, and sometimes what they do is shitty. Sorry.
Anonymous wrote:I don't push relationships. If my father (who is angry at me for not being friends with his ex-wife (who is not my mother)) wants to spend time with my daughters then he can reach out. The kids will be fine not having a relationship with him. They have people of all generations in their lives.
Sometimes family is the family you're born into and sometimes it's the family you create among friends.
Anonymous wrote:I don't push relationships. If my father (who is angry at me for not being friends with his ex-wife (who is not my mother)) wants to spend time with my daughters then he can reach out. The kids will be fine not having a relationship with him. They have people of all generations in their lives.
Sometimes family is the family you're born into and sometimes it's the family you create among friends.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:
She'll call around 11:30 or 4:30 (after she gets up for the day or after her nap) to see if he can come over.
That sounds pretty judgmental.
Anonymous wrote:
She'll call around 11:30 or 4:30 (after she gets up for the day or after her nap) to see if he can come over.
Anonymous wrote:OP, can you explain a little more?
MIL calls to see grandson every 6-8 weeks and rebuffs any invites to do activities with us (she has gone out with us to do something twice in 2.5 years)
Does she offer to do something specific and you counter-offer and she's not interested? Do you ask her if she has any ideas before you offer something? Or does she just call to say she wants to see him, but when you say "Great! What works for you?" she drifts into "I dunno . . . ."?