Anonymous
12/30/2014 11:28
Subject: Husband who hates hosting
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Some people are not hosts. I'm one of them. Home is my sanctuary. I socialize off-premises.
Then you should never ever accept invites to parties at other peoples homes.
I don't understand that mentality. We throw large annual gatherings. Lots of people. Many of whom never reciprocate. Our list evolves over the years as a result of that. We like to be guests sometimes too-not just be the ones doing the work and footing the bill.
I find your attitude really bizarre. Very tit for tat. You seriously think that your guests must reciprocate with large parties? You are a nutjob.
Anonymous
12/30/2014 11:26
Subject: Husband who hates hosting
He just needs to suck it up and deal with it. I love hosting with DW. She loves to cook and I don't mind the clean up. It isn't about us...it is about our guests. We like giving them a good time. They do the same in return.
Anonymous
12/30/2014 09:55
Subject: Re:Husband who hates hosting
OP I love socializing but dislike entertaining at home. My husband doesn't enjoy socializing at all but doesn't mind hosting at our house. We have one toddler.
I have never understood the appeal of entertaining at home. I dislike going to other people's homes--would much rather meet up at a restaurant, park, indoor play place, etc. So much more comfortable. That way there are no issues with food preferences, shoes issues, etc.
When I do entertain at home its not the cleanup that is an issue, its having other people in my space and being concerned that theyre going to mess it up somehow--spill on the sofa, rug, wear their filthy shoes inside, make negative comments on our homeetc. (we are a shoe feee house). It's not that we "live in a museum" but we have very nice and expensive furnishings and rugs.
Heres what makes entertaining at home less stressful for me:
-Limit the guests to one family at a time. I could not handle more guests than this at once--too chaotic and overwhelming.
-Have people over for a meal so there is more of a defined leaving time (i.e. come over for brunch, and they're here for 2 hours at the most)
-We have a finished basement that is our second family room, but I feel more comfortable entertaining there because the furniture is not as nice and is a dark color so spills would not be noticeable, and we have laminate down there and not carpet so its easy to clean. I put a buffet out on the bar and we can sit and eat and the kids can play.
-BBQ outside and eat on the deck
-Host parents only dinners more often than family events
-Entertain at home infrequently (2 or 3 times a year) but invite others to join us frequently at restaurants, festivals, etc. to show that we are interested in getting to know them.
Overall I'd be much more comfortable accepting an invitation to join another family out rather than in someone's home and I just don't get the appeal of having people over.
I have never understood the appeal of entertaining at home. I dislike going to other people's homes--would much rather meet up at a restaurant, park, indoor play place, etc. So much more comfortable. That way there are no issues with food preferences, shoes issues, etc.
When I do entertain at home its not the cleanup that is an issue, its having other people in my space and being concerned that theyre going to mess it up somehow--spill on the sofa, rug, wear their filthy shoes inside, make negative comments on our homeetc. (we are a shoe feee house). It's not that we "live in a museum" but we have very nice and expensive furnishings and rugs.
Heres what makes entertaining at home less stressful for me:
-Limit the guests to one family at a time. I could not handle more guests than this at once--too chaotic and overwhelming.
-Have people over for a meal so there is more of a defined leaving time (i.e. come over for brunch, and they're here for 2 hours at the most)
-We have a finished basement that is our second family room, but I feel more comfortable entertaining there because the furniture is not as nice and is a dark color so spills would not be noticeable, and we have laminate down there and not carpet so its easy to clean. I put a buffet out on the bar and we can sit and eat and the kids can play.
-BBQ outside and eat on the deck
-Host parents only dinners more often than family events
-Entertain at home infrequently (2 or 3 times a year) but invite others to join us frequently at restaurants, festivals, etc. to show that we are interested in getting to know them.
Overall I'd be much more comfortable accepting an invitation to join another family out rather than in someone's home and I just don't get the appeal of having people over.
Anonymous
12/30/2014 07:29
Subject: Husband who hates hosting
How about a party at a rec center? You can rent party rooms and soft playrooms for about $100, and bring Costco snacks. Might be worth it to avoid this fight.